Why did Justin Bieber smile in his mug shot? He did not understand the consequences of his horrible actions that could have killed many innocent men, woman, or children and, in jail, there could be very dangerous people living there.

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What is 18 inches long and makes a woman scream all night? Crib death.

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What's the best joke of all? YOUR SOCIAL LIFE!!!!!!!

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Why did somebody text "lol"? Because they laughed out loud.

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arse

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Why did the Jew pick up the loose change on the ground?Because he has to use it for taxi money to get back home.

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Q: I am an over-protective father looking for my son who was kidnapped and am suddenly traveling with a mentally retarded woman who cant remember her name. By the way my wife was murdered and my son has physical disorder. Then, im hooked up with a hippy who doesnt care about anything. Who am I? A: Marlin the clownfish (from Finding Nemo).

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what do you call a black guy in a cop car a cop

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A man witnessed a car crash. He was traumatized

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how do you keep a blond in sespence you dont tell her

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? Jelly doesn't contain pieces of fruit.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. Your family is dead.

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a fat man eats porkchops all day ling shit a just craped my pants

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In Soviet Russia! People were much more finacially secure than they are now.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb. Two. But it would have to be a very big lightbulb to fit both of them in there.

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Why did the old man fart?? Because he had gas

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What's a Mexican who walks down the street called? A pedestrian.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Stop being racist!Be a panda. They are black white and asian!!!!

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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Roses are #FF0000 Violets are #0000FF

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An Arian man walks into a German-owned bar and asks to use the restroom. The bartender sees this acceptable and allows it. Soon after, a Jewish man asks the same question, but this time the bartender said no. The Jewish man thought it was an outrage and demanded why, so the bartender calmly explained to him that the Arian man was still using the restroom and that when he was finished the Jewish man was free to poo as he pleased.

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What do you call a black armless legless man I Don't know but im kind of hungry

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Why didn't Sally eat the meatballs The meatballs ate her

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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