... and so the rabbi says "Don't worry. It was a kosher pickle anyway."

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everyone's always talking about the emperor's clothes, don't they know this is murica

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It's your mother, open the door.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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If life gives you melons.. You're just plain retarded.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT SALLY.

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How do you make an antijoke corny. How? Corn.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Cheese on toast.

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Did you see the blind man get hit by a car? Neither did he.

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Q: How do you kill a blonde? A: Put M&M's on the bottom of a pool, and tell her to arrange them in alphabetical order. By the time she starts to question this, the poison should be kicking in.

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What did the drug addict get for Christmas? He got hepatitis, fired from his job, and nothing from his family because their relationship was badly damaged by his addiction.

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Two guys walk into a bar, the third one is a duck.

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Women's rights.

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Knock knock Whos there? Orphan. Orphan who? Orphan miller. Orphan miller who? Orphan miller jones. Orphan miller jones who? Thats it. Oh okay, I get it you're doing a knock knock joke Yeah. did it go alright? Yeah I guess, untill we started talking in 3rd person.

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an invisible man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. No one noticed him cause hes invisible

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There was a blond girl, a redhead, and a brunette. They all walk into a hotel and are granted equally friendly desk service because hair color is not a reliable indicator of intelligence or economic status.

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Do you like fishsticks? If so you are not a homosexual fish as fishsticks are a frozen food rather than fish genitalia.

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A: Ask me if I'm a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

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Google Doodles

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Why was the man running from the cops? His car broke down.

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Gadaffi

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Are you a homophobe? No, I'm cake. ,.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing chair ? Gravity.

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Knock knock Who's there Heyyyy mackane!! ;)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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