What does a Mexican do in a landslide? Lose a good deal of his hard earned property to the disaster.

Knock Knock Who's there? I'm deaf. I'm deaf who? What?

Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell down and bumped his head He suffered a serious concussion and was never the same again.

No entiendo PORQUE cada día amanezco

Why can't Hank swim? Hank is a rock

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running. From the forest. That hell hole. He had got away, but he could remember. The darkness. The silence. Until the unmistakable scream of the guns and then- The Running. The Screaming. The Blood, oh the blood. Seeing Charlie. Oh, that damned soul Charlie. The bullet went right- But that was long ago. So long. But sometimes, in the silence, Chicken remembers. The Running. The Screaming. The Blood. And he screams.

Why was Susie screaming profusely? Susie has autism.

What do you call a Jewish lawyer, who is happily married to a woman, but goes and sees a man on the side? A gay Jewish lawyer who cheats on his fake wife.

One day, Little Timmy asked his mother this question, "Mommy, why are boys and girls different?" She responded, "You're adopted and Santa Claus is dead."

What do you get when you cross a horse and a pony? A mule

What did the pig say to the banana? Oink.

Knock Knock Who's There? Bad-mannered Bad-mannered who? F*ck Off

How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Who knows? They all just sit and bitch about it.

knock knock who's there a black person SHIT!!!!

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for his 8th birthday? Prosthetic arms and legs.

How do you make a small fortune? Be financially smart, work hard, save money, all while you make sure you don't let your earnings become a "large" fortune.

A: Ask me if im a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

“Anything that moves ey?” – William Deane

A bear walks into a bar and says to the barman "I'll have a pint of................ beer please." The barman says "why the big pause?"

Knock, Knock Who's there? Dementia Dementia who Knock, Knock

Avery has crabs.

whats worse then getting raped by a giant scorpion? getting raped by 2 giant scorpions!!!!!

why do sausage rolls taste of sausage and not roll? Seriously -_- what?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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