Q:How do you turn off a Jewish Lamp? A: You press the Auschwitz.

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Two guys walk into a bar... They sat down, had a few drinks and left without any incident.

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There is a car full of black people.

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised how far a can can preach in Chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he entered with a swine, and the muslim is embarrased for the horse.

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Why couldn't the orphans go on the field trip? Their parents couldn't sign the permission slip.

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There once was a beautiful princess named Snow White who lived with seven dwarves in the forest. One day, and old hag approached her and offered her an apple. She bit into the apple, chewed, and said,"Wow, that's tasty. Is this a Golden Delicious?" The hag said, "Why yes, it is. I have a private orchard. Perhaps I'll let you see it some time." The two promptly resumed their lives.

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What do you call a Mexican who steals a car? A criminal.

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Me: Knock Knock, Pornstar: Cum in.

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when do you go to heaven? Never, it doesn't exist.

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A Fish walks into a bar. It died of oxygen starvation.

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Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road? it said WALK.

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What's the deal with airline food? It's nourishing matter that sustains life, provides energy, and promotes growth distributed by flight attendants.

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why did every one in the world die? a Train pooped it's pants.

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What does mens "man sauce" and babies have in common? They're both fun to make and easy to kill...

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Why are "Polish" and "polish" spelled the same? The word is a homophone.

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What do you tell a girl with 2 black eyes? You should ice those to preven swelling aron the eyes

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Roses are red Violets are blue I rhyme like lil Wayne Fridge

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What is pink and fluffy? Pink Fluff.

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What happens every 10 seconds in Africa? 10 seconds passes by.

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What did David say to Goliath? Not sure, does anyone have a Bible?

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Why was the asian so good with computers? Because he spent 8 years in college getting a doctorate in computer programming at the University of Hartford

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Why couldn't the blonde divide 5 by 0? Because it's impossible to divide by 0.

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That's as _____ as a ______ guy. Works with anything, and people do laugh.

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how do you confuse a brunette? tell a joke about how there are no beaches in florida

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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