What's worse than 9 dead babies nailed to a tree? 1 dead baby nailed to 9 trees.

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

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Why is Michael J Fox so good at using shake weights? Because he is motivated to stay in good physical shape.

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What do you call a one-armed man Whatever his name is

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Why did the Jew pick up the loose change on the ground?Because he has to use it for taxi money to get back home.

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Is this Chick-fil-a? No, this is Joe.

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What is the difference between a bench and a mexican? the bench is an object

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Wanna hear a funny story? Sure Ok.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Why did the used car salesman stop selling cars? He got fired.

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What do you call a mexican without a lawn mower? .....unemployed

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How many Jews can you fit in a Jeep? Four.

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Simon Cowell's hair is real.

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Why can't a T-Rex clap his hands? Because its dead

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do you know a really good joke? i don't have one.

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Why couldn't the Little Boy hear his mother yelling at him? Because his mothers died

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whats better than shoes feet

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What is the difference between a bench and a black man? It is socially acceptable to sit on a bench to eat your lunch. If you did so to a black man you would probably be arrested.

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why did the koala fall out of the tree it was dead why did the 2nd koala fall out of the tree it was hit by the first koala why did the 3rd koala fall out of the tree it thought it was a game why did the 4th koala fall out of the tree it was fit by a fridge why did the 5th koala fall out of the tree it was inside the fridge why did the 6th koala fall out of the tree it was punished for dropping a fridge why did the 7th koala fall out of the tree it committed suicide after framing the 6th koala

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Why wasn't the child breastfed? Because it's mother died while in the process of giving birth and the father does not have the necessary mammary glands to produce human milk for the young child.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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A black man is packing heat while driving his car. He is a police officer

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Why did the 40 year old man quickly close his web page when his wife called his name? Because he had to leave.

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Q: What can a bench do that a mexican can't? A: Support a family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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