What's samller than a table but can't go under it? A baby with hay fork in his back.

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what do you call a cup?... a cup

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why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to get the waffle ice cream cone that was on the ground next to the little child who got hit by a bus.

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two boys break out in a verbal fight. the first boy says your so stupid youd sell a cow for a gallon of milk. the second boy replied, i agree with you 110%.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

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what's hard and pink going in a soft and wet coming out Gum

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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An Irish man, a Scottish man and an English man walk into a bar ... The Irish man's a bit dim, the Scotsman's tight with money and the Englishman's a bit of a racist.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He let go of it.

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How do you kill a blue elephant, with a blue elephant gun, how do you kill a pink elephant, you strangle it until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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What do you call Jesus Christ? Jesus Christ.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was infamous for stealing people's laundry, and 6 was insecure about his bare body

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Where did Betsy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His motives so far are unknown as he is a chicken, and therefor cannot divulge the information.

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Why did the black man win the staring contest? He's good at staring

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Yo mama so fat that her weight is starting to tear her and your father apart.

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How do you kill a Russian? You shoot him with a gun.

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Knock knock. Who's there? President. President who? The President of the United States.

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Why did the man eat the apple? Because he was hungry.

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Q:why are lamas cool? A:because m&m's are poisoned with deadly dosages of viagra.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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What does a Mexican do in a landslide? Lose a good deal of his hard earned property to the disaster.

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why did jimmy fall off the swing? because he was a tree.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops