A man walks into a bar, but it's really not his fault because his seeing eye dog led him right into it.

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why didnt the dog bark? he died in his sleep

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what's the difference between a lamborghini and you're mother. cars don't scream when you rape them

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the iPod hand is such a great deal It's only seven ninety-nine..........................................ninety nine for one hundredth of a dinosaur wait a minute...

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A kid with no arms or legs is stuck in the desert. Sucks to be him.

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What's better than nailing a baby into the wall? Football.

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Q:What do you call a dog with no legs? A:It doesnt matter he's not gonna come

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What do you call an insect that has 8 legs? A spider.

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What happened when the princess kissed the frog? She died, the frog was highly toxic.

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What did the black man say to the latino man? Nothing he was far to busy trying to get a cab to his office meeting for his board of directors do not appreciate tardiness

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Just kidding, Stephen Hawking doesn't drink.

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What is the difference between a bench and a mexican? the bench is an object

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Why was the panda sad? It's family died when China had an earthquake.

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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What do a baker and gynecologist have in common? They can smell it, but they can't eat it.

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How did Hitler like his steaks? He didn't like steaks, he was a vegetarian.

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? Call the police and have them deal with the tragedy.

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What is 69? A two digit number.

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W.N.B.A.

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a black guy leaves prison

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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I am funny, yes? No, you are not.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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