Jingle bells, batman smells, robin laid an egg.

I see says the blind man " no you don't" replied the deaf man... In the other room

How do you leave a man in suspense...

I'm ginger no more needs to be said...

What did the Atheist say in the church? His best friend's eulogy.

what is a vampires favorite dessert? a used tampon

What's the difference between a mouse and a dinosaur? A lot.

Why do you never hit a black man with your car? Because that's vehicular homicide.

*Knock-Knock* "Who's there?" "The police, you're under arrest for the murder of your wife and your two children."

Q) what happens when you tackle someone with 2 legs? A) you fall over

What is the black mans favorite color? -Time for you to get a watch

how do you make a blonde laugh on friday tell her shes a blonde on monday

Did you hear the one about the blonde who went to the grocery store? She walked in, purchased the items that she specified on her shopping list, then left and went to her daughter's piano recital.

A man about to get on a plane forgets to store his utility knife in his bag before the security scan. He is taken to a back room for private questioning and fined.

yo mama so fat she's fat

Why did James come back to drive the boat again this year? Because he likes driving boats and towing passengers

whats worss than getting a papercut gohnnarea

What do elephants have that no other animal has? Baby elephants.

A teenage boy tells his family that he is gay. His mother says she had always known, and they accept him for who he is.

why do sausage rolls taste of sausage and not roll? Seriously -_- what?

How do you make a panda toot? You punch it in the stomach.

Yo mama's so stupid, I told her it was chili outside so she went outside with a spoon.

What did Abe Lincoln say before he gave the Gettysburg Address? No one knows, its not documented.

why is 5 afraid of 6? it isnt

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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