Why did Tyrone attack? Because he was getting made fun of

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What's purple and green and has a criminal record including two counts of armed robbery, five counts of possession with intent to sell, one count of attempted murder, several citations for underage drinking, and a parking ticket? Barney, but ignore all that other stuff. His record was expunged.

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Why did Joseph kick the pig in the face? He though it'd be funny.

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Nero, what if you are using me now? Manipulating me? You think I enjoy falling in love after chatting with you in a site which is not even meant for chatting? You can do that, you are a "facilitator", I don't care as much for point zero, as I do care about you, hell, if things where different, id quit the whole thing to stay with you! I could say I will never forgive you if you make me feel safe by your side, accept your help only to get stabbed in the back for trusting you.

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What's grosser than gross? Grosser. What's grosser than that? Grossest.

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What Mary short for? Due to the fact she has no legs, on account of the flesh eating she contracted after a visit to argentina thanks to the make-a-wish foundation. Mary also has cancer

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a black man and a mexican are sitting in the back seat of a car....whose driving? the cop

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A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he felt the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies,"You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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What do you call a shop dedicated to selling watermelon, fried chicken and corn bread? A poor business model.

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Why do you put a baby in the blender but first? To see the facial expressions

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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What's big, grey and can't swim? A castle

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Why did the girl's cat fall from the ceiling? Because she didn't use enough tape.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ben. Ben who? Ben Dover.

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I am black.

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Q:How do you turn off a Jewish Lamp? A: You press the Auschwitz.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, we know you've been pirating movies.

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My dog has no nose, so how does it smell? It can't, I just told you it has no nose.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, go ask the chicken.

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What type of food was the black guy eating? fruit, he is on a diet

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Knock Knock Whose there? Yes I am a convicted child molester and by state law I must go door-to-door explaining the many cruel and vigorous crimes I have committed.

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What did a cat said to another cat? Nothing because cata dont talk.

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A man walks into a bar and says ouch, as he stubbed his foot when he became fully enclosed in the tavern.

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Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they have an in depth understanding of astrophysics and interstellar travel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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