that awkward moment when you get in the van and there are no sweets...

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef What do you call a cow that's been chopped in half? Dead

what did the deaf kid get for christmas ? An ipod.

How do you kill a fox in Canada? Cut it's leg off and let it run!

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Do you think people can change? No. They can change their mind.

Why did the monkey scream? He was hungry

Why did the todler fall over? He's an iraqi child and has ben shot inboth legs being readied fro public excution for fighting on the opposing side a.w. j.p.

Did you hear the Joke about the Deaf kid? Neither did he.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she didn't have woman's rights Knock knock Who's there? NOT Sally, she's in the kitchen

whats the oposite from anti-jokes? uncle-jokes. LOL

I am really good at math debating

Two business men, a priest and three boys are on a plane which is going down. There are only three parachutes. One business man says that they should allow the children to have the parachutes as they have long lives ahead of them. The other business man says screw the children. The priest looks up at the second business man. After a short but heated argument they all agree to let the children have the parachutes. The three children then proceed to jump out of the plane with the parachutes. The two business men and the priest watch as they descend upon the earth. The plane then crashes into a mountain, killing the business men and the priest. Once the boys were safely on land they went back to their daily lives in their individual homes. Turns out a serial killer had escaped from prison, all three children were found dead the next morning, the cause of death of course being that each had contracted some form of a sexually transmitted disease from the priest.

What is the difference between a black man and a bike? Bikes are not human beings and therefore cannot experience the ups and downs a human being experiences.

Why was the elderly, Asian, blond pulled over by the officer? She was, and has been completely blind since birth.

why did stacey marry bally because she loves him

Knock knock Who's there Heyyyy mackane!! ;)

Gadaffi

what's black, long, and moves around a lot? a van.

Knock knock.* Who is it? The police. We have news that your daughter was molested and will never been seen again for the man who stole her has takin' her out of our jurisdiction.

Hi colton

When life gives you Lebanon, make lebanonanade.

Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? He was blind.

Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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