A Muslim boards a plane and he sits done quietly and politely just like everyone else, the plan lands safely at its destination.

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what do you call a retarded kid? jack kamstra

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How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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Yo' momma's so fat that when she steps on the scales the number seen to appear is proportionately larger than that seen to appear when the average human steps on them.

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A man hanged himself, leaving a note. Nobody found him, nor the note. Nobody cared for him.

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How do you make $10,000 in 1 day? I don't know, but I wish I did.

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Your mom.

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Two guys walk into a bar. You think the second one would've noticed and avoided it.

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You're mom is so slutty, she has sex with many men.

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Your momma is so fat that the late, great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook her breasts for clocks

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Stevie wonder walks across the road without looking both ways.

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Two rabbits are being chased by dogs and hide in a log in the forest. The male pushes the female to the dogs which are at both sides of the log and gets off Scott free.

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How many dead babies can fit in a bathtub. Twelve. A previous joke said seventeen, that person had their facts wrong. I know from experience

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What is a pirate's favourite letter? There is no definitive answer. It depends on the individual pirate, and the environmental and genetic factors that go to make up his or her preference for a particular letter.

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Q: What do cooks do for a living? A: Eh muffin.

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Q: What happens when you throw a green rock in the Red Sea? A: It gets wet.

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Why couldn't the boy ride his bike? He had no legs. Why didn't he have any legs? He was hit by a truck.

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If life gives you melons ... You might be dyslexic

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why was the chinese man so good at math it was his favorite subject

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What's the difference between a duck? An armchair because the vest has no sleeves.

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Roses are burning, Violets are burning, my house is on fire

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Why did the old man fart?? Because he had gas

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Why are anti-jokes so funny?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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