Why did little Timmy get absolutely nothing for Christmas? He is Jewish.

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What is the black mans favorite color? -Time for you to get a watch

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whats better than shoes feet

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What's brown and sticky? Human Feces

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I walked into a dark ally at night and ran into 2 black men They severely beat me then while unconscious brutally raped me. I then spent 5 weeks in the hospital in a deep coma.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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What's black and white and red all over? Lots of things, including certain ugly clothing.

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Why did the dog go in the bar? Because the door was left open

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One night you tell your mom to make you a sandwich, the next day in school you ate a delicious peanut butter and jelly sandwich for lunch

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Doctor, Doctor I keep getting pains in the eye when I drink coffee! It's not the coffee, you have a deadly case of ocular melanoma, a form of cancer that affects the eye. You'll be blind within the next 24 hours.

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Sam: Knock knock? You: Who's there? Sam: Sammy Sosa. You: Hi, Sammy Sosa. Sam: Hi.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

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God.

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... and so the rabbi says "Don't worry. It was a kosher pickle anyway."

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Why is the dinosaur yellow? He's not.

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How do I recover from my Pokémon addiction? Catch 'em All!

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A black man, an Asian, a Jew, and an American all jump off a building. Unfortunately, they all died on impact and their families will mourn for years to come.

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It's your mother, open the door.

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Why did the monkey scream? He was hungry

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What's the leading cause of pedophilia? Sexy kids.

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What's worse than finding a real joke on anti-joke? Finding a repeated joke about no armed susy falling off a swing.

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A boy goes into Mourne View and meets a girl what happens next? He's now a father living off of the dole.

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What do you call five white guys sitting on a bench? THe NBA

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WHY DID THE KID RID HIS BRICK HE WAS BLIND

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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