How do you wake Lady Gaga up? Poker face

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A blind woman walks into a bar... she stands there confused because she is blind and can't tell what going on.

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my girlfriend keeps calling me a pedophile, thats a big word for a 3 year old

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Pianca going ham

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person 1-As me if I'm purple... person 2- Are you purple? person 1- no

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Why did the black man win the race Because he was faster than all the other contestants

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I think I may be colorblind.

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What do you call a gay, black, Muslim physician? Doctor.

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I am a real homosexual

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jess is a drama queen am i right rishi ?

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Why did the horse fall over? Because I shot it

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What is the difference between a duck? One leg is both the same.

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Hey you want to hear a joke? Oh well. Goodbye

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Q: What do you call a black man sitting on a bench? A: Whatever his name is.

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What is the same about a plum and an elephant? They're both grey except the plum

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Roses are red Violets are blue I own a lawn mower Can you swim?

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what did the deaf kid get for christmas ? An ipod.

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What do you call a person with no legs, no arms, no eyes, and no heart? Well he'd be dead wouldn't he?

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George W. Bush

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What's worse than a dead baby? A dead puppy.

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What did the drug addict get for Christmas? He got hepatitis, fired from his job, and nothing from his family because their relationship was badly damaged by his addiction.

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Why doesn't the chicken wear pants? Beacuse its pecker is on its face.

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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