What word starts with 'f' and ends in 'uck'? Firetruck

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Whats worse than having no mother? Having no mother and father, enabling you to have to support a family at the age of 12, using the allowance that your parents are supposed to give you once a week.

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what was the dying mans last words? im dying

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Knock Knock Whos there? Its dad mom died....

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Whats funnier than an anti joke? a real one.

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To hold their pants up.

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lol

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What do you get when an Alabama and an LSU kid are mixed?A small child who grows up in a world of fighting and domestic violence.

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How do you know if a monster is hiding under your bed or in your closet? Go and look.

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*Knock* *Knock* Who's there? The IRS

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Justin Bieber

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Q: What's better than a dead baby? A: Knowing who killed it, because then you can report them to your local authorities, thus creating a safer community.

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What did one muffin say to the other? I don't know, but you need a psychiatrist.

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Did you hear about that one time (@ band camp lol) where there was a little boy and he wanted to go swimming sooooo abd and then ooo look squirrel

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What's the difference between a bunch of slaves and a porsche? A: i don't have porsche in my basement

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A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he felt the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies,"You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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What is green and has wheels? Grass, i was lying about the wheels

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a man walks into a bar, sits down, sighs and says, "i had the worst day ever." the bartender replies with, "worse than 9/11?" the man then says "well, 9/11 wasn't that bad."

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-What's brown and rhymes with snoop? -Dr. Dre

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Why did the blond fail her Calculus test? She had a Biology test on the same day, and being that she is a bio major she felt it would be to her interest to put more emphasis on the bio test because she is only taking cal as an advanced elective credit, which would not effect her major GPA.

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what do you call a martial arts instructor with a medical degree who's name is Richard? Craig... just kidding, Richard

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Q .What robin told to batman before they got into the car? A. Get into the car!!

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What's big, grey and can't swim? A castle

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What do nine out of ten people enjoy? Gang rape.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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