Knock Knock? Whos there? akward neighbor. akward neighbor who?

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how do you confuse a brunette? tell a joke about how there are no beaches in florida

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A man walks into a bar, but it's really not his fault because his seeing eye dog led him right into it.

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What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza? One is a popular Italian food and the other is a human being.

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Q:What do you call a dog with no legs? A:It doesnt matter he's not gonna come

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the iPod hand is such a great deal It's only seven ninety-nine..........................................ninety nine for one hundredth of a dinosaur wait a minute...

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Your momma's so fat: She has found a value in relationships beyond an aesthetic level.

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How do you kill a down-syndrome kid? fire.

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What do you call a Jewish lawyer, who is happily married to a woman, but goes and sees a man on the side? A gay Jewish lawyer who cheats on his fake wife.

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Sea World Japan.

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Women's Basketball.

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What happened when the princess kissed the frog? She died, the frog was highly toxic.

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What do you call a mexican without a lawn mower? .....unemployed

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What's the difference between a dead baby in my garage and a Ferrari in my garage? I don't have a Ferrari.

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Do you know any good bird jokes? Well this is hawkward...

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what is a vampires favorite dessert? a used tampon

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Hello, ladies, look at your man, now back to me, now back at your man, now back to me. Sadly, he isn’t me, but if he stopped using ladies scented body wash and switched to Old Spice, he could smell like he’s me. Look down, back up, where are you? You’re on a boat with the man your man could smell like. What’s in your hand, back at me. I have it, it’s an oyster with two tickets to that thing you love. Look again, the tickets are now diamonds. Anything is possible when your man smells like Old Spice and not a lady. I’m on Sarah Jessica Parker.

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If John has 50 candy bars, and he eats 45, how many cadybars does John have? Diabetes, John has diabetes.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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What is the difference between a bench and a black man? It is socially acceptable to sit on a bench to eat your lunch. If you did so to a black man you would probably be arrested.

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Three men are walking down the street to buy groceries. They then take a left and continue walking towards the store.

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Why does Michael J. Fox make a great milkshake? Because he's had a successful career where he has made a substantial amount of money, allowing him to purchase high quality ingredients.

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why did the kangaroo jump? because its a kangaroo

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I LIKE TURLES.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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