A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What did the Atheist say in the church? His best friend's eulogy.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

once three middle easterns were walking down the street bomb bomb bomb

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why does Michael J. Fox make a great milkshake? Because he's had a successful career where he has made a substantial amount of money, allowing him to purchase high quality ingredients.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why do black people love watermelon? It's simply delicious.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why do you never hit a black man with your car? Because that's vehicular homicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Come in!

thumb_up thumb_down +22

The government wants us to stop using gas and be eco friendly. Tell that to Hitler.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Your feet are so big your gonna need bigger shoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

do you know a really good joke? i don't have one.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What is the black mans favorite color? -Time for you to get a watch

thumb_up thumb_down +20

why do sausage rolls taste of sausage and not roll? Seriously -_- what?

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because it's head's so far from his body.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why wasn't the child breastfed? Because it's mother died while in the process of giving birth and the father does not have the necessary mammary glands to produce human milk for the young child.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Any idea of his whereabouts Nero? I am the leader, I fund this myself, as you know money is not my problem, its rather loyalty.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Mmmmmmm Lemons

thumb_up thumb_down +16

jess is a drama queen am i right rishi ?

thumb_up thumb_down +16

When life gives you lemons you leave the earth in search of what strange lifeform sent you them.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

God.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Sam: Knock knock? You: Who's there? Sam: Sammy Sosa. You: Hi, Sammy Sosa. Sam: Hi.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why could the black man not fall asleep? The gunshots outside his home in Compton constantly awoke him

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why was 6 afraid of 7 Because 7 was black

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why are white people typically not as good at basketball as black people? They don't have the hard work and dedication as those who are better.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Avery has crabs.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops