What's worse than a dead baby? A dead puppy.

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What notes does the tightrope-musician have to worry about? They probably have to concentrate generally harder than the average musician in order to produce any correct, good quality notes.

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How do you beat someone in a video game? You win it.

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Do you know what Chuck Norris does for a living? He's an actor, I also heard he's quite good with martial arts.

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How do you get a beautiful woman to go to bed with you? "How?" It's not a joke, it's a legitimate question!

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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Two business men, a priest and three boys are on a plane which is going down. There are only three parachutes. One business man says that they should allow the children to have the parachutes as they have long lives ahead of them. The other business man says screw the children. The priest looks up at the second business man. After a short but heated argument they all agree to let the children have the parachutes. The three children then proceed to jump out of the plane with the parachutes. The two business men and the priest watch as they descend upon the earth. The plane then crashes into a mountain, killing the business men and the priest. Once the boys were safely on land they went back to their daily lives in their individual homes. Turns out a serial killer had escaped from prison, all three children were found dead the next morning, the cause of death of course being that each had contracted some form of a sexually transmitted disease from the priest.

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Guess what? Chicken butt? Poultry gluteus maximus!

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why did the bird fall out of the sky? it had been shot by a bird hunter, as it was bird season.

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Why did the penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

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Lets make like trees and stand still

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Gadaffi

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Have you ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Well it's really nice.

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What's your middle name? (Interrupt them) It doesn't matter what your middle name is! What does deduce mean? Fall down the stairs.

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A horse walks into a bar...n

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knock knock come in

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What did the boy and girl do at the wedding? 69:)

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gesss what happen u promis not to tell anyone ok this is what happen !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOTHING

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What did the goat say to the dolphin dogs don't lay eggs

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What did the Canadian Goose say to the Snow Goose? You're white.

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There is a penguin at the bakery: i want 2 loaves said the baker white or brown bread says the penguin does not matter I'm a moped

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Whats worse than your camera not working? getting hit by a fridge during the Holocaust

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a mexican, an asian and a black are all in a car, who's the driver? their friend bill who offered to take them to the upcoming three days grace concert.

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The biggest lie on earth: I have read and agree to the terms of use.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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