A man walks into a bar, he drinks, then leaves the bar.

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What is the most effective abstinence plan? There is none.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinson's Disease which causes his hands to shake uncontrollably thus making drawing anything relatively difficult and a perfect circle impossible.

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Q: How do find the population of Mexico? A: You Google it.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Your neighbor My neighbor who? I already told you, it's pronounced "Wu". I'm very sorry, Mr. Wu

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whats worse then getting raped by a giant scorpion? getting raped by 2 giant scorpions!!!!!

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Binladen coming to a beach near you :D

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What do you call someone who is blind and deaf? Dumb.

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Gloves.

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If you are going down the road in your boat and the pedal falls off how many cheese burgers can you eat 21 because a motorcycle doesnt have doors.

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Someone once told me a joke. It was funny.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? He was hit by a bus

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your all shit at jokes

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Whats better than a panda? A panda with an ice cream cone.

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Why could the black man not fall asleep? The gunshots outside his home in Compton constantly awoke him

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What did the American call the Arab? Nothing the American could not talk because he suffered from throat cancer because of the effects of 9/11 and thus causing his hatred towards Arabs and led to the Arabs death. Green

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Q- Why was Dan mourning the death of his wife? A- He wasn't he was mourning the death of his daughter who was killed in the same car crash as her mother.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenia, and don't have any friends

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Why'd the first koala fall out of the tree? He died. Why'd the second koala fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first koala. Why'd the third koala fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game. Why'd the refrigerator fall out of the tree? He thought he was a koala. Why'd the boy fall off the swing? He was hit by 3 koalas and a refrigerator. Why'd the boy fall off his bike? He had no arms or legs

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What happened to the kid who slept on a roof? He died

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Whats the definition of helpless? A quadraplegic in a washing machine

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What do you cal a thousand black people swimming to Africa with a Jew under each arm? Waterboarding.

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Kim Kardashian.

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Women's rights.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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