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A blind woman walks into a bar... she stands there confused because she is blind and can't tell what going on.

my girlfriend keeps calling me a pedophile, thats a big word for a 3 year old

How many Chinese men people does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Anyone can screw in a light bulb, regardless of race or gender.

Pianca going ham

Why could the black man not fall asleep? The gunshots outside his home in Compton constantly awoke him

What do elephants have that no other animal has? Baby elephants.

What do you call a gay, black, Muslim physician? Doctor.

What did Abe Lincoln say before he gave the Gettysburg Address? No one knows, its not documented.

I am a real homosexual

What is the difference between a duck? One leg is both the same.

Why did the horse fall over? Because I shot it

Q: What do you call a black man sitting on a bench? A: Whatever his name is.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a pedophile

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

What is the same about a plum and an elephant? They're both grey except the plum

what did the deaf kid get for christmas ? An ipod.

Roses are red Violets are blue I own a lawn mower Can you swim?

What do you call a person with no legs, no arms, no eyes, and no heart? Well he'd be dead wouldn't he?

What's worse than a dead baby? A dead puppy.

What notes does the tightrope-musician have to worry about? They probably have to concentrate generally harder than the average musician in order to produce any correct, good quality notes.

George W. Bush

If life gives you melons.. You're just plain retarded.

What did the drug addict get for Christmas? He got hepatitis, fired from his job, and nothing from his family because their relationship was badly damaged by his addiction.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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