What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What do u call someone who lies? Jack eckert qnd colin

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Your mom is so fat, her pants are starting to get tight.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Haha pizza

thumb_up thumb_down +36

?2 guys walk into a bar. One gets a beer the other get water.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What happens if you throw a red ruby into the black sea? It gets wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

yo mamma so fat she seen a yellow train full of white people and she said stop that twinkie

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Fruitcake

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Q:why are lamas cool? A:because m&m's are poisoned with deadly dosages of viagra.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why did the black guy hate the white guy??? Because the white guy enslaved his ancestors.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why did the black man win the staring contest? He's good at staring

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why was the black man screaming? The KKK was coming to lynch him.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Knock knock. Who's there? President. President who? The President of the United States.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

How do you kill a Russian? You shoot him with a gun.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

One time i ate a sandwich it was good

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What do you call a boy with no arms and a hunchback? -names

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What does a Mexican do in a landslide? Lose a good deal of his hard earned property to the disaster.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Have you ever seen the mexican that went to college? Yes, the DREAM act increased the number of minorities in public universities

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What's better than winning the lottery? Winning it twice.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Q:What do you call a dog with no legs? A:It doesnt matter he's not gonna come

thumb_up thumb_down +28

whats worse the being in a car crash? finding out that your mother and father were in the other car and were fatally injured.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops