What's not red? No tomatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

A pregnant woman takes the bus, once inside she realizes that there are no seats. No one was pollite enough to let her sit down so she felt pretty uncomfortable on the way home.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What's worse than the holocaust? The Russian Revolution

thumb_up thumb_down +40

how many fish does it take to turn on a lightbulb None, lightbulbs dont work in the ocean

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What happened at the finish line of the marathon? People collapsed in exhaustion, it was a marathon.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

why did every one in the world die? a Train pooped it's pants.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

what's hard and pink going in a soft and wet coming out Gum

thumb_up thumb_down +40

OK, A plane carrying 200 passengers crashes on the border between America and Canada. Which side of the border do you bury the victims? Well, it would depend on where the passengers where from or what they had stipulated in their living will. I suppose some would be cremated which opens up a whole other can of worms entirely.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

A boy and a girl are playing catch. Why did the girl drop the ball? She had no arms. So why did the boy throw her the ball if she had no arms? Cause he's a Dipshit

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Dandelions are yellow, and so are sunflowers.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

How did the guy with aids die? He died of aids

thumb_up thumb_down +38

what do you call a dead baby in a blender? child abuse

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Your mom is so fat, her pants are starting to get tight.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

A black guy and a Mexican jump off a bridge. Who dies first? Nobody cares.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest is a former alcoholic, and has the strength to turn around and leave.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He let go of it.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What did Jerry Sandusky get for Christmas? Raped in jail.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Whats black and has a large penis? A dog with large genitalia.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why did the thief steal the kitchen sink? Everything else was stolen by another thief earlier in the day.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Rosea's afre rewd Voleasts a/ere bluejw I ahve parkinson's dise'ase it ttook 4 hoiurs to w'irite this

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Q: How do you fit a giraffe inside a refrigerator? A: You can't, it is physically impossible...

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did the black man win the staring contest? He's good at staring

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops