alcoholism kills

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Roses are Red, violets are blue, I have STD, Now so do you. :3

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What is green and has wheels? Grass, i was lying about the wheels

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What do you call someone that hates gay people? An asshole.

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Why do mexicans jump the gate Because theres a sale at chipotle

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3 guys and 2 women walk into a bar and sat down........... good to see both sex`s were welcome in the bar

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Roses are red, violets are blue; So go in bed, where I'll join you...

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? Tortilla Chips

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Boy: Is your body from McDonalds ? Girl: Aww is it because your lovin' it? Boy: No, it's because your greasy and fat!

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What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Nothing. He is Jewish, therefore he does not celebrate Christmas, he celebrates Hanukkah. So he won't get a present for Christmas, he will get eight presents for Hanukkah. (He'll like getting a good deal).

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Why did the girl's cat fall from the ceiling? Because she didn't use enough tape.

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Two guys walk into a bar... They sat down, had a few drinks and left without any incident.

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Q:How do you turn off a Jewish Lamp? A: You press the Auschwitz.

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When geese fly, they often fly in a V-formation. Why is one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

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Why did the insect play marco polo? It couldn't. Marco polo requires multiple players.

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A man walks into a bar and says ouch, as he stubbed his foot when he became fully enclosed in the tavern.

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What's worse than being raped? Finding out that because you were sexually violated, you are now a victim of unplanned pregnancy and have contracted AIDS and any number of other STD's from the horrible expirence that will forever haunt your nightmares.

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What s faster than a black guy with a TV? His brother with a VCR.

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A Poem that would be from a stocker: Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a Gun Get in the Van and NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What did the cowboy say to the alien? Nothing, this is a dream. Wake up.

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Lightening never strikes the same place twice. But it killed both my parents.

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What do you call a Mexican who steals a car? A criminal.

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why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

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What should I name my dog?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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