What do you call a man who gets off the train at Willoughby? Dead

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What do you throw a drowning guitarist? An emergency floatation device.

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Lindsay Lohan is often caught flashing her vagina...

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 9/11

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What's the differance between a pile of leaves and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a pile of leaves burning in my backyard.

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Who is Soulja Boy's best friend? YOUUUUUUUUUUUU

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A white guy drives to Home Depot in order to get supplies for remodeling his kitchen. He notices a few Mexicans standing around outside. He decides to go to to Lowe's instead.

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how do you make sure someone is dead shoot them

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N****R = nice israeli girl great education rich

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What do you call a black priest? Holy Crap

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Nero, what if you are using me now? Manipulating me? You think I enjoy falling in love after chatting with you in a site which is not even meant for chatting? You can do that, you are a "facilitator", I don't care as much for point zero, as I do care about you, hell, if things where different, id quit the whole thing to stay with you! I could say I will never forgive you if you make me feel safe by your side, accept your help only to get stabbed in the back for trusting you.

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How do you fit 90 Jews in a Volkswagen Bug? You can't.

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-Whats the worst part about being a black jew? -You have to sit in the back of the oven.

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whats red white and blue? i dont know

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Three jewish men are standing in at a bar. Its getting late and the bartender tells the three men its time to go home. As they walk out to the street, the bartender asks if they will be needing a ride home. Of course these three men had a few drinks, but did not live too far down the road, so they decided to walk. They pass the first mans house and he goes in to see his wife and three kids. They walk past the second mans house and he goes in to see his fiance leaving only one man left. He gets to his house, unlocks the door and goes inside only to find a note on the counter. He gets onto his computor and see that he forgot his wallet at the bar. He goes downstairs and walks out the door only to find himself falling into a giant pit. After falling for a while he starts thinking about his life. Then he remebered that he wasnt jewish.

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What do you call a shop dedicated to selling watermelon, fried chicken and corn bread? A poor business model.

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I slept with a girl with aids and now I do and so does everybody else I have sex with

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? Tortilla Chips

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What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Nothing. He is Jewish, therefore he does not celebrate Christmas, he celebrates Hanukkah. So he won't get a present for Christmas, he will get eight presents for Hanukkah. (He'll like getting a good deal).

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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What's funny and arousing? This joke.

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Connor "Rusty" McLeod

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Why was the mouse flying? Because an Owl picked it up, carried it to a tree and ate it.

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. "Where's my tractor?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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