what did the man say when he got in the car?nothing he lost his voice in an accient that morning

What is a mexicans favorite sport? Whatever he is interested in.

the awkward moment when Rick Astley gives you up

Got milk? No.

what do you call a martial arts instructor with a medical degree who's name is Richard? Craig... just kidding, Richard

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? With the technology of compact fluorescent light bulbs they don't go out for much longer, so the question is nearly irrelevant.

Knock Knock Who's there? Ben. Ben who? Ben Dover.

two philosophers stood in silence at the foot of a very large mountain; a mountain not only too high to climb, but also too wide to walk around. So the first philosopher finally speaks: "...so, what do you do for a living?"

what did the man say to the other man? hi

What's worse than being raped? Finding out that because you were sexually violated, you are now a victim of unplanned pregnancy and have contracted AIDS and any number of other STD's from the horrible expirence that will forever haunt your nightmares.

Why didn't the man show up for work on Monday? He gets Mondays off.

A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

Jessica walks into a bar jokes jessica cant walk

A few black men walk into a bank... They all open seperate savings accounts and add a portion of that week's pay to put forward money to pay for their children's college education.

what do you call the one eyed man in the land of the blind? You call him an outcast

What's worse than the holocaust? The Russian Revolution

What did the cat say to the chicken? Nothing. Animals are not capable of speaking.

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest is a former alcoholic, and has the strength to turn around and leave.

why did every one in the world die? a Train pooped it's pants.

What do you call a banana that's about to be eaten? A Banana

What happens if you throw a red ruby into the black sea? It gets wet.

Rosea's afre rewd Voleasts a/ere bluejw I ahve parkinson's dise'ase it ttook 4 hoiurs to w'irite this

Whats long and hard? a pole

Q: how many Pollocks does it take to paint a house? A: 100. 99 to spin the house and 1 to hold the paint brush

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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