Did you hear about the anorexic with the yeast infection? Apparently she's really good at math, and if she can overcome her afflictions she wants to become an accountant one day.

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What is the same about a plum and an elephant? They're both grey except the plum

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Why are mexicans such hard workers? I don't know.

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Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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penis

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? Statistically speaking, in a brief survey done by the United States Traffic Commission, they stated that a standard 4-door sedan had the highest percentile of drivers. So, in regards to the legal system, a person may only fit, in fact, 5 jews in a car.

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(Q)What do you call 4+4? (A) A math problem.

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When life gives you lemons. You make beef stew. #andymilinokis

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Osama Bin Laden. Oh wait...

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Q; Why does paint dry? A; Because plankton are single cell organisms

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why did the little old lady die? she was mugged then shot in the head 5 times.

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jordan HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHH

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What is green but looks like a silver car? A silver car....I lied about the green part.

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...and I'm a Mormon.

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Baseball

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I am really good at math debating

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roses are black violets are black your going to die with hate and sorrow

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husband : honey , can i have stuff candy wife : no husband : can i have milk and cookies wife : what kind of milk wink wink husband 2% you pervert

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Whats worse than breaking your pencil? Getting a cactus shoved up your ass.

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What do you call a pickle that is sad? A pickle!????

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a duck walked into the 7-11, grabbed a slurpee and told the man at the register, "put it on my bill". But the man behind the counter was Indian, and could not understand what the duck was saying. The duck then walked out confused, wondering why he was buying a slurpee in the first place

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Knock knock Who's there? FBI

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Lets make like trees and stand still

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Why does a chicken lay an egg? If she'd throw it, it would break.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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