What's the difference between uranium and plutonium? Blast radius

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A man walks into a bar. Ow!

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whats worse than one bee sting... two bee stings whats worse than two bee stings... the holocaust whats worse than the holocaust... three bee stings

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Why did people call the girl a cow? Because she was fat.

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What did the sexually promiscuous man get for Christmas? AIDS.

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What's red and round? A red and round solid.

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Jim and Larry work together. Jim works hard, and Larry is a bit of a prankster. One day, Jim is having a rather rough day, and Larry looks to cheer him up with a good-natured joke. Knowing that Jim's wife prepares dinner for him every night of the week, he calls her and tells her that their boss has decided to pay for a dinner out, that she should take the day off and just get ready for Jim to come home and pick her up. Larry will later follow up by calling a pizza delivery place and having them send a special no hard feeling message with two large delicious pizzas. He forgets to call the pizza delivery man until later that night, after which it's too late and he thinks "I'll just explain the joke to Jim tomorrow." And goes peacefully to sleep. Arriving home and finding that dinner is not prepared, Jim savagely beats his wife.

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Whats worse than finding one worm in your apple? Two worms.

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Yo Momma's sooo fat that the speed of light at her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s.

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Diseases show if a prerson lacks vitamins and minerals.

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Mean while... at Jerry Sandusky's house

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your mamas so old, her social security number is 1!

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Justin Littleton getting laid.

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Three blind mice walk into a bar, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative

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So Mel Gibson walks into a bar, and then everyone left.

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What do you call a blue duck that speaks? A dream.

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A horse walks into a glue factory..

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Binladen coming to a beach near you :D

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If you have alzeimers, wait, never mind i forget.

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What happened to the black man when his alarm went off? He got up and took a shower. Then he got dressed and went to church because it was Sunday.

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A Jewish man with a boner walks into a wall. What hit the wall first? Probably his penis.

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roses are red, violets are not, this poem makes no sense. Bananas

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Why did the fly get off the toilet? It got pissed off.

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What did your father say before he died? Nothing, he's already dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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