What do you call a duck with a mustache? A duck with a mustache.

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your moms so fat she has a heart attack when she walks to the pantry.

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Three men died and were met at the pearly gates of heaven by St. Peter. Which not only proves that there is a heaven but that St. Peter actually does greet all of its new inhabitants at the entrance which is in fact marked by gates of pearl.

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what did the man say when he got in the car?nothing he lost his voice in an accient that morning

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The man who ran behind the bus got exhausted. The man who ran in front of the bus got tired. The first one survived.

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a man walks into a bar, sits down, sighs and says, "i had the worst day ever." the bartender replies with, "worse than 9/11?" the man then says "well, 9/11 wasn't that bad."

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-What's brown and rhymes with snoop? -Dr. Dre

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I have read and agree to terms of service.

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What's wrong with him? He lit the flashlight at both ends.

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What do you call a black Arnold Schwarzenegger? Arnold Schwarzenegger.

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Why was the mouse flying? Because an Owl picked it up, carried it to a tree and ate it.

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What happened to the chicken who crossed the road ? Quite obviously he got to the other side to be greeted by a 50 foot half man half chicken who had one leg.

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Why didn't the man show up for work on Monday? He gets Mondays off.

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"What starts with F and ends with a K?" "firetruck?" "no, f u c k"

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What is a girl with one leg called ( iliene )

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two boys break out in a verbal fight. the first boy says your so stupid youd sell a cow for a gallon of milk. the second boy replied, i agree with you 110%.

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What do you call a banana that's about to be eaten? A Banana

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a boy walked into a pet store to get his bird some food. they were all out. the bird died.

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There's a American, Mexican, and a Canadian stranded in the desert. They couldn't find any food, water, and shelter. They were all really hungry and thirsty. Later that day the Mexican dies from a very bad infection on his neck.

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Whats sad about a black women killing herself? She was my mother

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Your mom is so fat, her pants are starting to get tight.

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What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza? One is a popular Italian food and the other is a human being.

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Two guys walk into a bar, one is treated for a concussion.

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Q: how many Pollocks does it take to paint a house? A: 100. 99 to spin the house and 1 to hold the paint brush

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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