When life gives you lemons. You make beef stew. #andymilinokis

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the man who was punched in the throat say to his friend?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you get a beautiful woman to go to bed with you? "How?" It's not a joke, it's a legitimate question!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Your mom is such a slut that she has herpes.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what did the noob say to the gamer your a gamer nooob

thumb_up thumb_down +6

whats better than a dead baby..... wait..... whats worse than a dead baby...... never mind its not that funny anymore

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why did the bird fall out of the sky? it had been shot by a bird hunter, as it was bird season.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Have you ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Well it's really nice.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a girl with no arms and an eyepatch? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the indian man take the peanuts out of his lunch? Because he's allergic.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

It is cruel to want a "sky full of lighters" as, according to the Laws of Gravity, the lighters will eventually come back down to earth and incinerate everything below them.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What does a man like. food.

thumb_up thumb_down

Want to hear an anti-joke?

thumb_up thumb_down

Whats worse than than Holocaust.? Finding two worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did sally fall off her swingset? Because she was hit with a refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What happened to the man who was hit by a car? He was immediately rushed to a hospital and was reported to have a broken femur dislocated shoulder and several broken ribs. The driver was later found and was declared driving under the influence of alcoholic beverages and the victim's family sued the driver for the medical costs. The driver was arrested and was sent to a detention center for 3 months and the victim made a complete recovery.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A father gives some golf balls to his son on his son's birthday. The son then goes into the woods with the golf balls, and then comes out without the golf balls. "What did you do with the golf balls?" asks the father. The son says nothing. On Christmas the father gives his son more golf balls, and the son does the same thing. He goes into the woods with them, and leaves without them. Again the father asks what he did with the golf balls, and the son says nothing. This happens for many holidays to come, until the son gets hit by a bus. In the ambulence, the father asks; "One last question ,what did you do with the golf balls?" The son dies

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Violets are red Roses are blue I scrrewed that up Now can i screw you?

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the black guy walk into the supermarket and buy 100 bananas? Because he works at the zoo you racist!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

"Doctor do i have aids?" asked the worried 13-year old.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's the difference between Jews and boy scouts? Boy scouts come back from their camps

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what's the difference between a bearded man and bearded lady the bearded man has a PENIS

thumb_up thumb_down -8

chuck norris

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do Ed Milliband and David Milliband have in common? They are brothers.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops