Q: how many Pollocks does it take to paint a house? A: 100. 99 to spin the house and 1 to hold the paint brush

A kid with no arms or legs is stuck in the desert. Sucks to be him.

Why was the black man screaming? The KKK was coming to lynch him.

whats the difference between a dog and a cat? ones a dog.

Shit.

They say under Chuck Norris's beard, is just a chin.

One time i ate a sandwich it was good

3 black men walk into a bar. They order their drinks, tip the bartender, and could not have been more courteous.

Why aren't jokes funny in base 8? Because 7, 10, 11.

I'm ginger no more needs to be said...

Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree Perpresher

Jingle bells, batman smells, robin laid an egg.

If John has 50 candy bars, and he eats 45, how many cadybars does John have? Diabetes, John has diabetes.

why did the chicken cross the road? why do you care?

What does does an elephant and a grape have in common? They are both grapes except for the elephant.

What's worse than listening to a teacher talk? This joke.

Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

justin littleton. nuff said

how do you make a blonde laugh on friday tell her shes a blonde on monday

roses are red violetes are blue you need to shut up or I will kill you

How do you wake Lady Gaga up? Poker face

Your mother smells so bad that people make comments about it behind her back, and one person mailed her some soap.

9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape

two muffins are in an oven one muffin says man its pretty hot in here and the other muffin says oh my god a talking muffin

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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