I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus, the divorce papers were filed soon thereafter.

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Three blondes are walking through the woods when the come upon a set of tracks. The blondes stepped away from the tracks to watch the train as it went by.

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Why couldn't the woman go grocery shopping? She was paralyzed from the neck down.

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I am black.

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Knock Knock Whose there? Yes I am a convicted child molester and by state law I must go door-to-door explaining the many cruel and vigorous crimes I have committed.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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how do you kill a blonde? -a gun, knife or any other lethal object

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Why did the insect play marco polo? It couldn't. Marco polo requires multiple players.

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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What's wrong with him? He lit the flashlight at both ends.

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What do you get when you cross an African-American, a bird, and ice cream? I don't know.

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If you say gullible over and over again, it sounds like stupidity.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it is common to find chickens and other wild and/or domesticated animals roaming through the streets in a multitude of countries.

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Why did the man fall down the steps? I shot him in the face.

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What did the man say to his wife when he bought a dog? I bought a dog.

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'Hey do you know a joke?' 'No' 'Me too'

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How do you start a Mexican parade? Close off the streets you plan to have the parade on, and be sure to have a decent amount of floats and marching bands.

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Do you know what Ethiopian food tastes like? Neither do they

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whats the best thing about fukkin twentyone year olds...theres twenty of them

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A man walks into a bar, looks to the right and sees a man one foot tall playing the piano, he sits at the bar and says to the bar tender,"I'm feeling kind of down" the bar tender gives him a bottle of very strong alcohol and later that night he goes home and hangs himself.

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What is the difference between you and Chuck Norris? You're reading this and he's probably doing something productive.

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Knock, Knock! Who's there? Matt. Matt, who? You're friend Matt that you texted twenty minutes ago telling me to come over.

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What do you call a deaf person? You don't they can't hear you.

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Whats long and hard? a pole

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops