I have no joke. u mad?

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A fellow walks into a bar very down on himself, so he goes into the bathroom and hang himself from the pipes.

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What's sweaty, fat, and Italian? Italians

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What did the frog say Magican? Ribbet.

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what do you call a jewish ladies boob? a joob

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How did the dog die? It was wet because of the rain so the little boy put him in the microwave for 30 minutes to warm him up

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What's worse then a dead baby? a dead baby in a blender

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Do you know what's funny? Retarded people.

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A man walks into the bar, goes up to the bar tender and says "exuse me, please could I have a pint of bitter" the bartender says "sure"

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue It is Valentines Day So I had to get them for you or we would get into a big fight, which will end up with me on the couch.

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Lilys are from england violets from japan. I've got a knife now get in the van

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Why did the mushroom go to the party??? Cuzz he was a fungi (fun guy)

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I have a door you don't have to say, knock knock.

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Would I ever lie to you? No, because lying is bad.

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how do you get a chicken to sleep you slit it"s neck,and feed the body to your pet tiger

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Why was the blonde woman crying? -because she witnessed her infant get sucked into a jet engine and was very sad.

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What does spongebob do to get high. Nothing, spongebob doesnt exsist.

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Daddy daddy daddy. What. Will you buy me a porn for my birthday. What! I want porn daddy. Shut up gosh your a 8 year old girl

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A plane carries 500 bricks. 1 falls out. How many bricks are left? 499. How do you put an elephant in a fridge in 3 steps? Open the fridge, put in the elephant, and close the fridge. How do you put a deer in a fridge in 4 steps? Open the fridge, take out the elephant, put in the deer, then close the fridge. The Lion King is having a party. All the animals are there except for one; who is it? The deer: He is still in the fridge. An old lady is crossing a swamp, but it is a crocodile swamp. How does she cross? Normally, all the crocodiles are at the Lion King's party The old lady dies at the edge of the swamp. How? A brick falls from the sky and kills her.

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What did the Chinese restaurants do with dogs that wander into the kitchen? Kept them as pets.

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The racist uncle went to attend his nieces bat-mitzvah. Although he is racist, he is smart enough to not speak his mind, for he is in a temple, and may offend many people at the service.

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What is a mexicans favorite sport? Whatever he is interested in.

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I have read and agree to terms of service.

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Humpty dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty dumpty had a big fall. All the king's horses and all the king's men did not come to help him because the United States does not have a patriarchal system of government.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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