A woman refuses to make a sandwich and walks away unharmed.

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Two men walked into a bar, the third followed close behind.

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What's the difference between The Holocaust and baking pizza? Pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

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Ah dead on it was all Taggart!!!

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What do you call two guys hanging by your window? Kurt and Rod

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How do you get an elephant into a fridge? You can't - elephants are too big to fit in fridges. How do you get a giraffe into a fridge? You can't, see above. If there is a raging fire in the jungle, which animal will survive? Most likely the parrots and other birds, as they can fly away.

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Why dont dinosaurs speak english? Because a meteor hit the earth and ran them into extinction

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms. They were lost in a tractor accident.

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Want to hear an anti-joke?

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what the orphan boy get for christmas? Not his parents

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If you look up stupid in the dictionary the definition would say stu·pid? ?[stoo-pid, styoo?] -er, -est, noun adjective 1. lacking ordinary quickness and keenness of mind; dull. 2. characterized by or proceeding from mental dullness; foolish; senseless: a stupid question. 3. tediously dull, especially due to lack of meaning or sense; inane; pointless: a stupid party. 4. annoying or irritating; troublesome: Turn off that stupid radio. 5. in a state of stupor; stupefied: stupid from fatigue.

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What is x (4 - 10) + 6879 (333) x 678912345 - 9.87537 when x equals pi? Answer: YOUR FACE!!!

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What color is my lamp? Brown

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you just lost the game!

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A man is cheating on his wife. His wife finds out and is instantly distressed and begins to cry.

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This is a haiku The second line is longest Hippopotamus.

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Roses are red Roses are red What is big Cherenets head

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how do you get a cat out of a tree? -call the fire department

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Why don't rhetorical questions need answers? Because that is what makes them rhetorical.

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Roses are red Vilots are blue God made people pretty What the happend to you

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Are you from Tennessee? Cause Jamaican me crazy.

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*Knock Knock* "whose there?"... "me"

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What did the fat man get for his birthday? diabetes

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Anal cheese curds.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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