what do you call a martial arts instructor with a medical degree who's name is Richard? Craig... just kidding, Richard

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...Jack Vale

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ben. Ben who? Ben Dover.

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A Mexican and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have a couple drinks. Then they leave because it turns out that wasn't the bar they were meeting the Jew at.

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Why did the little girl fail her test? She had mental retardation.

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What do you call 4 Mexicans hopping the border? 4 Mexicans in search of a better lifestyle from poverty.

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What's the difference between a black man and water? All black men have water in them, but not all water has a black man in it.

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My dog has no nose, so how does it smell? It can't, I just told you it has no nose.

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I am black.

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Wanna hear a "Friday" parody? No, that would be copyright infringement.

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SPAMS!!!

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Knock Knock Whos there? smell map smell map who?...really? I was in the middle of a phone call with my paraplegic wife's doctor, who was telling me that her condition has gotten worse and doesn't think she'll make it to the end of the month. You interrupted that in order to get me to say something that sounded like "smell my poo". Forget being allowed into my house, you should be worried about being allowed into heaven. Hopefully as you walk home today, someone will murder you.

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar, they then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, peace, harmony and understaning between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, essentially they are all the same, and want happy existences with family and friends, and that equality and peace between religions should be a prime focus of religious institutions and governments. They then band together to criticize aetheists, who present a much more probable explanation for why the Universe is the way it is. An eavesdropper then mulls over the idea that the various religions represented behind him are willing to debate philosophical standpoints, so long as their monotheistic beliefs are not contradicted.

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? Carrots! ... well if they were invisible..

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Relax, and I do not mean as in hypnotic "relax as you do not not... Okay I used it again I am just joking" Nice, so are they like pretty doubles or not?

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A boy and a girl are playing catch. Why did the girl drop the ball? She had no arms. So why did the boy throw her the ball if she had no arms? Cause he's a Dipshit

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Lightening never strikes the same place twice. But it killed both my parents.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick

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When life gives you melons, you know you're dyslexic.

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What's worse than being raped? Finding out that because you were sexually violated, you are now a victim of unplanned pregnancy and have contracted AIDS and any number of other STD's from the horrible expirence that will forever haunt your nightmares.

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Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness ... Hello?

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Why is Joe white? Because he's white.

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Mmmm, donuts

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Why did the black guy hate the white guy??? Because the white guy enslaved his ancestors.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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