What do you call an illegal citizen from the Middle East? Someone seeking a better life in a democratic country after suffering in a communist government for his entire life.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some chapstick, put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because as all people know, Ducks cannot speak, however, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need chapstick anyway, since he has no lips.

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did you know Helen Keller had a dog? neither did she.

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what do you call a needle with two heads? a two headed needle

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Q: What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas. A: A specially modified coffin.

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What do u get when you mix a young asian woman and a black man? Tiger Woods

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A van drives into a car.

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your mom is so old that she farts dust.

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So this guy walks into a bar. He is promptly rushed to the hospital due to the risk of brain damage, concussion, or other serious head injury.

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69

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How did the dog die? It was wet because of the rain so the little boy put him in the microwave for 30 minutes to warm him up

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Roses are red Violets are blue Get in the car or i'll shoot you

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Where else? The junk yard

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why were there moans coming from the sandusky household Mike sandusky, was having sex with his beutiful wife, maria meanwhile Mike's cousin, jerry was sitting in a jail cell

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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A man walks into the bar, goes up to the bar tender and says "exuse me, please could I have a pint of bitter" the bartender says "sure"

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Q:"Wanna Here a Joke?" A:"Yea Sure" Q:"Why can't Stevie Wonder read?" A:"Umm....because he's blind?" Q:"No, because he's black."

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What is a mexicans favorite sport? Whatever he is interested in.

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When geese fly, they often fly in a V-formation. Why is one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

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A person walks into a store. He goes to a worker an asks "were is the potatos?" . The worker says, there on that shelf.

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Your mom is so fat that it's becoming a serious health concern...

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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If you say gullible over and over again, it sounds like stupidity.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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