I jizzed in my pants. It tasted good

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Why did the fly get off the toilet? It got pissed off.

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Herman Cain

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25

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Real jokes.

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Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree Perpresher

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What's the similarity between a grape and an elephant? Both are purple except for the elephant.

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I'm ginger no more needs to be said...

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What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

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why did jimmy fall off the swing? because he was a tree.

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What do you call an elderly women who after the death of her late husband had many enconters witb men? A whore.

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Simon Cowell's hair is real.

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Knock Knock. Go away!

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What is the difference between a bench and a mexican? the bench is an object

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Whats 2+2=? ?= CHICKEN

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because people kept making the same joke about her not having arms so she was hoping the fall would break her neck.

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An Arian man walks into a German-owned bar and asks to use the restroom. The bartender sees this acceptable and allows it. Soon after, a Jewish man asks the same question, but this time the bartender said no. The Jewish man thought it was an outrage and demanded why, so the bartender calmly explained to him that the Arian man was still using the restroom and that when he was finished the Jewish man was free to poo as he pleased.

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What's funnier then an anti-joke? People who fail at making them.

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why did the kangaroo jump? because its a kangaroo

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What is purple, covered in pus, and squeals? A purple hippo with an infected scab yelling at the pain

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Two black guys are in an elevator, one guy gets off at the sixth floor, and the other on the eighth. And thats it.

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Oliver's friends

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What did Tommy's father tell him on Christmas? Nothing, he was violently stabbed to death on Christmas Eve.

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What does a ghost get when he watches pornography? A boner

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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