A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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Do you know what paper I get?.... Loose leaf :o

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The husbant is back from work. He opens the door of closet and finds... Narnia.

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Quit repeating the damn jokes you jackasses it ruins the laughter. Like if you agree.

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If one train goes east at 30mph and another train goes south at 53mph, how many pancakes does it take to make a mattress? 7 because peanut butter can't climb trees.

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your moms so fat she has a heart attack when she walks to the pantry.

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What do you call Justin Bieber having sex with a women? Sex.

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What did the Chinese restaurants do with dogs that wander into the kitchen? Kept them as pets.

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? Tortilla Chips

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what did the man say to the other man? hi

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I tried to post an unfunny punch-line-less joke on anti-joke. It worked and I got tons of emotional affirmation from it and stuff, so thanks.

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Why was the mouse flying? Because an Owl picked it up, carried it to a tree and ate it.

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how many jews can you fit in a honda civic 1 in the driver seat, 1 in the passenger seat and 3 in the back properly fixed with safety belts.

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Q. How do you make an atheist appreciate life? A. Break his legs.

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Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness ... Hello?

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The WNBA

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why does andy thomson speak that slow because he speaks that way

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What's worse than being raped? Finding out that because you were sexually violated, you are now a victim of unplanned pregnancy and have contracted AIDS and any number of other STD's from the horrible expirence that will forever haunt your nightmares.

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Katlin Poladian liked her own status again.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

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What did Jerry Sandusky get for Christmas? Raped in jail.

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What do you call a black armless legless man I Don't know but im kind of hungry

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Q. What is brown and sticky? A. Creosote.

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Why did the black guy hate the white guy??? Because the white guy enslaved his ancestors.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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