whats small, black, and crispy? a baby in a drier

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness ... Hello?

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

thumb_up thumb_down +41

OK, A plane carrying 200 passengers crashes on the border between America and Canada. Which side of the border do you bury the victims? Well, it would depend on where the passengers where from or what they had stipulated in their living will. I suppose some would be cremated which opens up a whole other can of worms entirely.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What happend when Chuck Norris did a push up? He did one push up.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

how many fish does it take to turn on a lightbulb None, lightbulbs dont work in the ocean

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Shes dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Jessica walks into a bar jokes jessica cant walk

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Q: How do you fit a giraffe inside a refrigerator? A: You can't, it is physically impossible...

thumb_up thumb_down +35

There's a American, Mexican, and a Canadian stranded in the desert. They couldn't find any food, water, and shelter. They were all really hungry and thirsty. Later that day the Mexican dies from a very bad infection on his neck.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What is the hardest part of a vegtable? The wheel chair 0.o

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Yo Aodhan yer hands smell of pish

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Noah is Smart.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did Pikachu say to Ghandi? Pika Pika

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A kid with no arms or legs is stuck in the desert. Sucks to be him.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

They say under Chuck Norris's beard, is just a chin.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the man eat the apple? Because he was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

why did the chicken cross the road Kill yoself

thumb_up thumb_down +31

3 black men walk into a bar. They order their drinks, tip the bartender, and could not have been more courteous.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What happens when you eat too many breadsticks? You get constipated.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you call a boy with no arms and a hunchback? -names

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What has human male genitalia? A human male

thumb_up thumb_down +29

wanna hear a joke?... Womens rights

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do divorce and a loose bear in a zoo have in common? They both tear families apart

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops