You know what's worse than finding a worm inside an apple? finding crack, too late to spit it out.

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a fat black man walks into an aquarium he enjoyed his day viewing many sea animals while buying a souvenier on his way out.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Why so serious? Why bad grammar?

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Why did the monkey sit on the toilet? To have a bowelmovement

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One time i ate a sandwich it was good

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Why do Jewish people where hats in church? They feel there head will often get cold

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Why do women where make-up and perfume? because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Africa is great, you should get raped

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I'm ginger no more needs to be said...

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Knock Knock. Go away!

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roses are red, violets are blue, fudge is sweet, heres some fudge.

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Yo momma's so short, it's probably because she's in a wheelchair.

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*Knock-Knock* "Who's there?" "The police, you're under arrest for the murder of your wife and your two children."

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive Cause she's a woman

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Nice legs, what time do they open the free bar, I'd like to by you a drink.

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An Arian man walks into a German-owned bar and asks to use the restroom. The bartender sees this acceptable and allows it. Soon after, a Jewish man asks the same question, but this time the bartender said no. The Jewish man thought it was an outrage and demanded why, so the bartender calmly explained to him that the Arian man was still using the restroom and that when he was finished the Jewish man was free to poo as he pleased.

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Two guys walk into a bar, the third one is a duck.

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do you know a really good joke? i don't have one.

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What did the mole say? Nothing

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How do you make a kids fall off a swing? Throw an axe at them

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My friend said that onions are the only food that could make you cry. That was before I hit him with a watermelon.

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What does a girl with no arms on a swing? Falls.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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