Why did sally fall off her swingset? Because she was hit with a refrigerator.

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What happened to the little kid sitting next to a fat kid ? The little kid got DEVOURED

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A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin. However, the skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor their secret.

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Your mama's so fat, she's dead!

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Wanna hear 2 short jokes and a long joke? Joke, joke , joooooookkkeeee

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What do you call 2 black men sitting on a porch? Craig and Smokey

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a black father

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what was the dying mans last words? im dying

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Q: How did the blonde commit suicide? A: She shot herself in the head.

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how do you make sure someone is dead shoot them

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Whats funnier than an anti joke? a real one.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted to see his mother before she passed away of terminal cancer

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A murderer takes you hostage. He lists three ways that you will die, but he lets you choose your death: 1. A bullet in your head. 2. A knife in your heart. 3. A lethal injection. What do you choose? It doesn't matter. You're dead.

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Three men died and were met at the pearly gates of heaven by St. Peter. Which not only proves that there is a heaven but that St. Peter actually does greet all of its new inhabitants at the entrance which is in fact marked by gates of pearl.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.

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Roses are white Violets are white I did it in the garden

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what happened to the mexican who dropped his ice cream at work? He got a raise, won the $5 billion jackpot, was given ten car dealerships, then died.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Cos crossing the road usually doesn't work out too well for chickens.

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What did the Chinese restaurants do with dogs that wander into the kitchen? Kept them as pets.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was A bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy went through chemo. Fuzzy Wuzzy wasn't very fuzzy was he?

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-What's brown and rhymes with snoop? -Dr. Dre

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? With the technology of compact fluorescent light bulbs they don't go out for much longer, so the question is nearly irrelevant.

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roses are red facebook is blue you look f**kable so i'll add you by: matt

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Why did the little girl fail her test? She had mental retardation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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