How do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the Brake

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Roses are red Violets are blue Get in the car or i'll shoot you

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*Knock* *Knock* Who's there? The IRS

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What's the best thing about sex with 24 year olds? They're in their sexual prime.

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why were there moans coming from the sandusky household Mike sandusky, was having sex with his beutiful wife, maria meanwhile Mike's cousin, jerry was sitting in a jail cell

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Why did the orange put on the sun block? Because it was afraid of turning into a TAN-gerine!

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Whats worse than being a Jew? Being black.

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your moms so fat she has a heart attack when she walks to the pantry.

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There was an old woman who lived in a shoe. She had so many children her uterus fell out.

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What is bad about being black and Jewish? Your gonna have to sit in the back of the oven

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? Tortilla Chips

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what do you call a martial arts instructor with a medical degree who's name is Richard? Craig... just kidding, Richard

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Got milk? No.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was A bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy went through chemo. Fuzzy Wuzzy wasn't very fuzzy was he?

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Person 1) Yo mama's so fat Person 2) My mother died in a horrible car accident last week

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What do you call 4 Mexicans hopping the border? 4 Mexicans in search of a better lifestyle from poverty.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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Waseem likes to talk with his mouth full.

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Why did polly fall of her swing ??? She had no arms

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What do you call a black Arnold Schwarzenegger? Arnold Schwarzenegger.

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What do nine out of ten people enjoy? Gang rape.

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Why did the panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second panda fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first panda. Why did the third panda fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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Why was the mouse flying? Because an Owl picked it up, carried it to a tree and ate it.

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haha.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops