Why did the todler fall over? He's an iraqi child and has ben shot inboth legs being readied fro public excution for fighting on the opposing side a.w. j.p.

How do you kill a fox in Canada? Cut it's leg off and let it run!

Why did the penguin cross the road? Chicken

WHY DID THE KID RID HIS BRICK HE WAS BLIND

When does the Trogdor come? In the Niiiiighhhttttt.

What did the white guy the black guy and the Asian all have in common Penises

What is purple and flies? A purple plane.

Indeed.

A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

What happens if Pinoccio says my nose is about to grow?

beiber i straight

Jim fell of his bike, wanna know how. Someone threw a car at him. Knock knock, who's there, not Jim

Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

Knock knock Whos there? Orphan. Orphan who? Orphan miller. Orphan miller who? Orphan miller jones. Orphan miller jones who? Thats it. Oh okay, I get it you're doing a knock knock joke Yeah. did it go alright? Yeah I guess, untill we started talking in 3rd person.

What's the difference between a single mom and a stripper? Job status.

why did the chicken cross the road? because he felt like it.

what's better than animal crackers? your mom.

What's the difference between a Mercedes and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Mercedes in my garage.

What's worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Finding half a worm and wondering where the other half is. o.O

Write your own

How do you get an elephant into a fridge? You can't - elephants are too big to fit in fridges. How do you get a giraffe into a fridge? You can't, see above. If there is a raging fire in the jungle, which animal will survive? Most likely the parrots and other birds, as they can fly away.

Two men walked into a bar, the third followed close behind.

What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

Why did the man throw the clock out the window? The man's loving family had recently been murdered, and the clock was a constant reminder of their mortality, as it had served as the center of those horrific events.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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