Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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Josh kissing a girl

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Why couldn't the cat eat it's food? It's face was stapled to the floor.

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Why isn't this joke funny Because i have cancer

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He removes the piece of lingerie from his face and continues shopping for clothes.

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What did the mother say to her baby? These little piggies taste good!

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Did you hear about the black man who went to college? Me too! I'm so proud of him!

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Did you hear about the anorexic with the yeast infection? Apparently she's really good at math, and if she can overcome her afflictions she wants to become an accountant one day.

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Why did the todler fall over? He's an iraqi child and has ben shot inboth legs being readied fro public excution for fighting on the opposing side a.w. j.p.

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What's worse than finding a real joke on anti-joke? Finding a repeated joke about no armed susy falling off a swing.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenia, and don't have any friends

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What's brown, dusty, and full of male? My asshole.

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What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

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Why was the plumber very sad Because i killed his family

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jordan HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHH

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What is 6 plus 9? 15

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how to you kill an Irish midget? You don't as murder is illegal and discriminating against a certain type of person is racist.

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sixty....eight.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing chair ? Gravity.

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whats better than a dead baby..... wait..... whats worse than a dead baby...... never mind its not that funny anymore

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Why did the indian man take the peanuts out of his lunch? Because he's allergic.

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Why is little Susie crying? Her entire family is dead.

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If a quiz is a quizzical what is a test? It is an assessment intended to measure the respondents' knowledge or other abilities.

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why did the bird fall out of the sky? it had been shot by a bird hunter, as it was bird season.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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