It is cruel to want a "sky full of lighters" as, according to the Laws of Gravity, the lighters will eventually come back down to earth and incinerate everything below them.

Person 1: Do you like impressions? Person 2: Yes! P1: Why? ... P1: That was Socrates.

What happened to the man who was hit by a car? He was immediately rushed to a hospital and was reported to have a broken femur dislocated shoulder and several broken ribs. The driver was later found and was declared driving under the influence of alcoholic beverages and the victim's family sued the driver for the medical costs. The driver was arrested and was sent to a detention center for 3 months and the victim made a complete recovery.

Knock knock! Yes?

What do you call a man with no eyes or ears? - Deaf and Blind.

knock, knock. use the doorbell next time.

Your mom is so fat she beat up snorlax from pokémon, than got charged for abbuse because it is illegal to use physical violence on pokémon unless in a battle or in attempt to capture one.

What do you call an illegal citizen from the Middle East? Someone seeking a better life in a democratic country after suffering in a communist government for his entire life.

a black father

your face.

Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No...........

Whats worse than having no mother? Having no mother and father, enabling you to have to support a family at the age of 12, using the allowance that your parents are supposed to give you once a week.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a big dick, Lets have sex.

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an axe. -Tag

What's the differance between a pile of leaves and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a pile of leaves burning in my backyard.

What's blue and screams when you look at it Idk that's why I'm asking you

Hitler

Q: How many Jews can fit in a four door Sudan? A: Two in the front, three in the back, six million in the ash trey.

Lindsay Lohan is often caught flashing her vagina...

what did the nazi say to the jew? hi

Roses are red Violets are blue Get in the car or i'll shoot you

69

Roses are red Violets are blue Today is your birthday So happy birthday

Why did the orange put on the sun block? Because it was afraid of turning into a TAN-gerine!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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