There was an old woman who lived in a shoe. She had so many children her uterus fell out.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

What is the difference between a Jew and pizza? a pizza doesn't yell when it goes into an oven

thumb_up thumb_down -42

How do you get a baby out of a blender? Tortilla Chips

thumb_up thumb_down +69

what do you call a martial arts instructor with a medical degree who's name is Richard? Craig... just kidding, Richard

thumb_up thumb_down +65

Got milk? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

Fuzzy Wuzzy was A bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy went through chemo. Fuzzy Wuzzy wasn't very fuzzy was he?

thumb_up thumb_down +61

-What's brown and rhymes with snoop? -Dr. Dre

thumb_up thumb_down +61

What do you call 4 Mexicans hopping the border? 4 Mexicans in search of a better lifestyle from poverty.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

What do nine out of ten people enjoy? Gang rape.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

What do you call a black Arnold Schwarzenegger? Arnold Schwarzenegger.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Why was the mouse flying? Because an Owl picked it up, carried it to a tree and ate it.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Why did the panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second panda fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first panda. Why did the third panda fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

thumb_up thumb_down +49

You're so straight!

thumb_up thumb_down +49

haha.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

barack osama

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why did the man go to the restaurant? Because he wanted to get some food.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

69

thumb_up thumb_down +45

A man has 72 cookies, he eats 64 of them. What does he have left? Diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Whats 10+10? A mathematical equation.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What did the cowboy say to the alien? Nothing, this is a dream. Wake up.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

whats small, black, and crispy? a baby in a drier

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Niko isnt a mexican douche

thumb_up thumb_down +43

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised how far a can can preach in Chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he entered with a swine, and the muslim is embarrased for the horse.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops