"Oh yeah?!" "Yeah!" "You wanna go?!" "No, sorry. I got plans." (walks away)

Why did the old man die? Because everyone dies

A kid with no arms or legs is stuck in the desert. Sucks to be him.

Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducked.

The chicken came before the egg. Because eggs are an unborn chicken, and it is impossible for an unborn chicken to ejaculate.

What do you call a diving-board factory worker threatening to jump off the roof? Names.

Womens rights. Are extremely valuable because women are equal.

Your Mama is so poor. I begin to worry about you and your familys' finacial situation.

Knock knock. Who's there? I am.

What is the first step in making an ugly girl pretty? Shave her genitals.

Why did the boy miss a day off school? He was in a coma

Q) what happens when you tackle someone with 2 legs? A) you fall over

Why did the man loose his balls? he had testicular cancer and had to get them removed.

What did your father say before he died? Nothing, he's already dead

A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink and then goes home and beats his wife.

Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

A man walks into a bar, he drinks, then leaves the bar.

Why aren't jokes funny in base 8? Because 7, 10, 11.

Why did the plane full of Arabs crash? One of The engines failed

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Come in!

your mamas so old, her social security number is 1!

What is the difference between a bench and a mexican? the bench is an object

What did Gene give Carla for Christmas? AIDS

What's yellow and can not swim? A Bulldozer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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