Hey! did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she...

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whats round and like a ball a ball

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Two women were sitting in silence.

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What did the pedephile do to the young boy? Smiled at him, said hello, and kept on walking.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to.

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There's a American, Mexican, and a Canadian stranded in the desert. They couldn't find any food, water, and shelter. They were all really hungry and thirsty. Later that day the Mexican dies from a very bad infection on his neck.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the chicken.

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"Oh yeah?!" "Yeah!" "You wanna go?!" "No, sorry. I got plans." (walks away)

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Why did the passenger plane crash? Well, if not mechanical failure or human error, probably because a bomb was detonated onboard.

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How do you starve colored people? deny them food stamps

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What's the difference between a train and a lamp? A lot

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Why did the white man rub the black man's hair for good luck? Because it's good luck to rub a black man's hair.

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What has human male genitalia? A human male

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Why did the lion get lost? -The jungle is massive

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Why couldn't the blonde divide 5 by 0? Because it's impossible to divide by 0.

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penis

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What do you call a diving-board factory worker threatening to jump off the roof? Names.

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I have the heart of a child... in a jar on my desk.

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An elderly lady walks into an elevator. She falls over and I kick her in the head.

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- If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together. - You don't need to because N and O are already together. - Then maybe a cyber-relationship would work. - Why ? - Look at your keyboard, U and I are next to each other.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken probably crossed the road because of some sort of impulse or external stimuli (most likely a bug or a worm located on the other side of the road) in which he or she responded to by proceeding to cross the road in order to get to the other side as chickens have a sense of cause to effect in which the effect would be consuming the bug or other living life form.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Bad-mannered Bad-mannered who? F*ck Off

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Why is the world round? Because oranges are purple.

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What do you call a dragon that doesn't breathe fire? A Griffin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops