A Muslim terrorist walks onto a bus, with the mindset to blow him and the other 27 people up*. Before he steps onto the bus, he realizes the error in his ways and decides to not follow through. He goes to the airport instead.

If Vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat? Probably both plant life, sea-based creatures, and land-based animals. However, depending on the personal preference of the person, they can also be a vegetarian or not. They could also be cannibals, but the literal definition of humanitarian would go against any cannibalistic traditions due to the fact that humanitarians help others for the benefit of humanity as a whole, eating people would go against such beliefs.

What do You call a black porn star from alaska? By their first or full name depending on your relationship with them and the situation.

Niko isnt a mexican douche

whats small, black, and crispy? a baby in a drier

Roses are green Violets are yellow I have mental problems Doobah haga Blakatrabbit

why does andy thomson speak that slow because he speaks that way

What happend when Chuck Norris did a push up? He did one push up.

how many fish does it take to turn on a lightbulb None, lightbulbs dont work in the ocean

The geese of Growmore

What happens when you mix 3 pounds of baking soda, 2 dozen cans of Mr. Pibb cola, and a live tortoise? It makes a terrible mess and your wife gets upset at you for getting the house so dirty. She refuses to clean it up.

whats slower then a turtle A FATTY

What runs faster than a dead baby? Almost everything.

Why doesn't Rick Moranis come out with anymore movies? He left the film industry in 1997, six years after the 1991 loss of his wife, Anne, to liver cancer.

What did the giraffe say to the monkey? Nothing

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Dandelions are yellow, and so are sunflowers.

A man walks into a bar, looks to the right and sees a man one foot tall playing the piano, he sits at the bar and says to the bar tender,"I'm feeling kind of down" the bar tender gives him a bottle of very strong alcohol and later that night he goes home and hangs himself.

What did the pedephile do to the young boy? Smiled at him, said hello, and kept on walking.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the chicken.

Q: How do you surprise a newt? A: Jump on it while shouting, "slippers." This may not work as the newt may die before it has the chance to be surprised, however the slippers should be intact.

Katlin Poladian liked her own status again.

Whats a good source of iron? A piece of iron.

this website...

yo mamma so fat she seen a yellow train full of white people and she said stop that twinkie

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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