What did the black man say to the white man? Hello.

Why couldn't dracula's wife get to sleep? She had insomnia.

What do you call an anti joke website? http://anti-joke.com

why did the chicken cross the road? because he was being chased.

Whats the difference between the holocaust and Norm McDonald? One can be laughed at the other is Norm McDonald.

Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

two philosophers stood in silence at the foot of a very large mountain; a mountain not only too high to climb, but also too wide to walk around. So the first philosopher finally speaks: "...so, what do you do for a living?"

What do black men do in the South? Hang around

what did the duck say to the dog. quack

A rat scurries into a bar. Six days later, all of the people in that bar die of bubonic plague.

Knock Knock Whos there? smell map smell map who?...really? I was in the middle of a phone call with my paraplegic wife's doctor, who was telling me that her condition has gotten worse and doesn't think she'll make it to the end of the month. You interrupted that in order to get me to say something that sounded like "smell my poo". Forget being allowed into my house, you should be worried about being allowed into heaven. Hopefully as you walk home today, someone will murder you.

What's funnier than 24? 25.

Knock knock! "It's unlocked"

Why did the burglar rob the bank? because he needed money due to the economic decline.

A pregnant woman takes the bus, once inside she realizes that there are no seats. No one was pollite enough to let her sit down so she felt pretty uncomfortable on the way home.

What do you call a jew with no money It doesn't really matter because all jews have money

why does andy thomson speak that slow because he speaks that way

STOP LOOKING AT MY JOKE

What do you call a monkey? A monkey.

'Hey do you know a joke?' 'No' 'Me too'

Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

Q:why are lamas cool? A:because m&m's are poisoned with deadly dosages of viagra.

AROUND

roses are red, violets are blue, fudge is sweet, heres some fudge.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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