Two peanuts were walking down the street and one was asalted

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Nick. Nick who? Nick Wyatt

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how do you stop a train? you cant..

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What's orange and can fly through walls? A Magic Orange.

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Your mom is so fat she beat up snorlax from pokémon, than got charged for abbuse because it is illegal to use physical violence on pokémon unless in a battle or in attempt to capture one.

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25

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A mushroom walks into a bar, the bartender says, "We don't serve your kind." the mushroom asked why, the Bartender said, "Because your under aged"

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Excuses are like butt holes...they are round

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Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No...........

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What did the homosexual say to the purse walking down the street? - I'm a homosexual.

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wanna hear a really funny joke? sure women's rights.

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Hey your name is really Tifa? Sorry, I hate scheming, but in this kind of situation I have to play things safe, I have a wife to take care off, I mean it, I really hate it. Anyway, I got your number, location everything, now if you did send people to harm or even worse kill me, you wont be doing that again, trust me, if I die of an assault, you die next, whoever you are.

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Q: What did the guy say to his girlfriend? A: "I like turtles!" Then he smacks her ass.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Get in the car or i'll shoot you

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Whats funnier than an anti joke? a real one.

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abortion, it really brings out the kid in you.

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What's the best thing about sex with 24 year olds? They're in their sexual prime.

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What's long, hard and full of seamen? A submarine.

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why were there moans coming from the sandusky household Mike sandusky, was having sex with his beutiful wife, maria meanwhile Mike's cousin, jerry was sitting in a jail cell

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.

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What is bad about being black and Jewish? Your gonna have to sit in the back of the oven

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what happened to the mexican who dropped his ice cream at work? He got a raise, won the $5 billion jackpot, was given ten car dealerships, then died.

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A plane carries 500 bricks. 1 falls out. How many bricks are left? 499. How do you put an elephant in a fridge in 3 steps? Open the fridge, put in the elephant, and close the fridge. How do you put a deer in a fridge in 4 steps? Open the fridge, take out the elephant, put in the deer, then close the fridge. The Lion King is having a party. All the animals are there except for one; who is it? The deer: He is still in the fridge. An old lady is crossing a swamp, but it is a crocodile swamp. How does she cross? Normally, all the crocodiles are at the Lion King's party The old lady dies at the edge of the swamp. How? A brick falls from the sky and kills her.

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What's worse than finding gum stuck on the bottom of your desk? A clown following you around carrying a shotgun and throwing toothbrushes at you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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