your mamas so old, her social security number is 1!

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This is not Will Smith.

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One day, Little Timmy asked his mother this question, "Mommy, why are boys and girls different?" She responded, "You're adopted and Santa Claus is dead."

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Your mother gets so hungry, she eats.

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What did one guy say to the other guy?? Well he just hi but hi backwards is ih and that reminded him of his days in Nahm because that's what his Sargent said and that reminded him of ice-cream because his Sargent smelled like ice-cream and that reminded him of the song that the ice-cream played which reminded him of Disney world which reminded him of a priest raping little boys which mad him laugh because that reminded him of a Jew picking up a penny which reminded him of Osama be shot in the f**k**g face and that reminded him to say how are you to the other guy.

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what is a vampires favorite dessert? a used tampon

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How do you start up a good conversation? Wanna have a good conversation?

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for his 8th birthday? Prosthetic arms and legs.

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Why did Bob the Builder die? I threw a fridge at him

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Obamacare!

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Whats the definition of helpless? A quadraplegic in a washing machine

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What does a ghost get when he watches pornography? A boner

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Why did the kids stop playing tag? Because the boy was "it" was kidnapped and never seen again

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Whats worse than dieing of Alhzymers? Anal Rape

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Why did the old man step on the caterpillar? For fun.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and and no legs in front of a door? A: A quadruple amputee.

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A Man walks into a bar and orders a scotch. His alcoholism is tearing his family apart

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a women picks up her phone and screams! There were 3 missed calls from her mother-inlaw

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Last night I had consensual sex with my long term girlfriend in the missionary position. It lasted approximately 4 minutes before I ejaculated into the durex extra safe condom.

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What's green, fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree and lands on you, you'd die? A pool table.

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SAY

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What happens when you are caught in the serious offense of killing somebody with intent? You get in trouble.

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What did the cheese say to his friend, who was also a cheese, before the cheese took a picture? ''Cheese''.

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jokes r dumb

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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