Obamacare!

What did the deaf man say to the blind man? The deaf man spoke no identifiable words because he could not hear what he was saying. He mumbled a few phrases in jibberish, and the blind man continued looking for his favorite brand of Ramen Noodles at his local Harris Teeter.

What does a girl with no arms on a swing? Falls.

hi ....................... oh i thought this was a chat room !!!!!!!

What did Joel say to the mouse. We're both dead mouses.

Why was the boy un-able to talk He was retarded

Why did the man throw his alarm clock out the window? Because he has anger management issues.

Whats the definition of helpless? A quadraplegic in a washing machine

Your Mamma is so poor that she begs for money.

What does a ghost get when he watches pornography? A boner

Your mother smells so bad that people make comments about it behind her back, and one person mailed her some soap.

Whats the difference between a horse and a pile of wheat? Its a pile of wheat.

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(insert Anti-Joke here)

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

Did you hear about the anorexic with the yeast infection? Apparently she's really good at math, and if she can overcome her afflictions she wants to become an accountant one day.

How do you know if you've been drinking too much? You find yourself in a closet screaming, "I'm in Narnia!!!"

roses are red violets are black why is your chest as flat as my back

3 blonds walk into a bar ouch

What's green and has wheels? Grass...I was just lying about the wheels.

What do you call a bunch of balck men running down a hill. A bunch of balck men running down a hill.

Last night I had consensual sex with my long term girlfriend in the missionary position. It lasted approximately 4 minutes before I ejaculated into the durex extra safe condom.

the WNBA

A baby seal walks into a club.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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