I'm on the seafood diet. A large proportion of my daily food intake is fish.

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Your life That's the joke

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Knock knock! Who's there? Your neighbor My neighbor who? I already told you, it's pronounced "Wu". I'm very sorry, Mr. Wu

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Why did Ashley run out of juice in her house? Because she drank it all!

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What is the difference between a black guy and a bucket of crap? Well, one consists of two inanimate objects (a bucket and feces) and the other is a human being of African/African-American descent. As you can see there really is no real comparison here.

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What's a Mexican who walks down the street called? A pedestrian.

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What do you call a Jewish lawyer, who is happily married to a woman, but goes and sees a man on the side? A gay Jewish lawyer who cheats on his fake wife.

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How did the jew reply to the racist comment? Judaism is not a race, it's a religion.

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What happened when the princess kissed the frog? She died, the frog was highly toxic.

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Man: Drink this. Man 2: Ok. (Drinks it) Man; You drank a powerful substance that is 20000 times stronger than hydrochloric acid! Man2: Oh FUCK! Kelvin Yang.

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Women's rights

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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69

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

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Knock Knock Who's there? I'm deaf. I'm deaf who? What?

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Whats blue, sticky and glows only during the morning? IDK -Lets go Mets

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What do you call a one-armed man Whatever his name is

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One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

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Knock Knock Who's There? ... knock a door run

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Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree Perpresher

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Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

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Yo momma's so short, it's probably because she's in a wheelchair.

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Whats 2+2=? ?= CHICKEN

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How do you wake Lady Gaga up? Poker face

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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