Want to hear a joke? Jerry Sandusky's innocence

What is the difference between you and Chuck Norris? You're reading this and he's probably doing something productive.

Why did the man eat the apple? Because he was hungry.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? The Police, your family just died in a car accident/

What do you call a diving-board factory worker threatening to jump off the roof? Names.

What did the twin towers get at the pizza place? 2 planes

Why did Hitler cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways. Only after practicing proper safety procedure did he venture across the busy thoroughfare to retrieve his asthma medication from his car.

A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

Knock knock. Who's there? I am.

penis

Your life That's the joke

What do you get when you make a website to put jokes on? People repeating the same joke over and over again, and still managing to get good ratings.

Wanna hear a joke!? Miley Cyrus.

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 1

A baby seal walks into a club...

A baby seal walks into a club. And is brutally murdered for a hunting round.

Why was the truck covered in blood? The chicken tried crossing the road

What's huge, gray, and has a trunk and wings. An elephant with wings glued to it.

Mean while... at Jerry Sandusky's house

Knock Knock Who's There? Bad-mannered Bad-mannered who? F*ck Off

Oliver's friends

Q:What did a young Arnold Schwarzenegger say when his friends wanted to play a game pretending to be 18th century composers? A: "I'll be Mozart!"

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because people kept making the same joke about her not having arms so she was hoping the fall would break her neck.

What do a large mouth bass and my wife have in common? They are both in the Animal kingdom, both are vertebrates and they share many other traits such as eyes, a notochord, and epaxial/hypaxial musculature.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...