What did the doctor say to his patient? You have cancer

Two women were sitting in silence.

Do you want to hear a joke? Sure. Justin Bieber is straight.

How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Two.

Why....... Because.

Q: What is worse than loosing your arms? A: Dying

why are these jokes so funny? why are u so fat bitch

How do you win a war? Drop a fridge on your enemies.

The chicken came before the egg. Because eggs are an unborn chicken, and it is impossible for an unborn chicken to ejaculate.

What do you call a diving-board factory worker threatening to jump off the roof? Names.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? The Police, your family just died in a car accident/

How do you know that a woman is having an orgasm? They go like OH YAH OH YAH:D

Knock knock Whos there? D D who D's nuts!

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A Kinect

milly, milly, milly, cat

Why can't Hank swim? Hank is a rock

What did the guy say to the mushroom?

What's better than winning the Silver Medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 1

Whats worse than The Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he was dead.

How do you make a small fortune? Be financially smart, work hard, save money, all while you make sure you don't let your earnings become a "large" fortune.

Why do women where make-up and perfume? because they are ugly and they smell bad.

whats worse then getting raped by a giant scorpion? getting raped by 2 giant scorpions!!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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