Roses are red violets are next thing you know my D*** is in you

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Why is there velcro on the edge of the table. Because its there to hold the microwave.

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Why couldn't the girl charge her phone? The charger wasn't plugged in.

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You mamma's so fat that even Dora can't explore her!

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This desk is two chromebooks wide. It will be one once I push yours off.

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What's the best thing about sex with 24 year olds? They're in their sexual prime.

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I JUST HAD SEEX! How blantant, eh?

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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james schmitt whats your last name

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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When is a joke funny? When you read it.

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A: Knock knock B: Who is it? A: You'r wife. B: My wife? A: Yes! B: Ok, then i think i pass that question.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra but like he actually did not a bar a womens breats.

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What is bad about being black and Jewish? Your gonna have to sit in the back of the oven

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Two girls were sitting quietly. Badum tss

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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what is the worst thing in the galaxy? runing out of dr.pepper :(

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barack osama

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haha.

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Chocolate tastes good.

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Knock Knock Whos there? smell map smell map who?...really? I was in the middle of a phone call with my paraplegic wife's doctor, who was telling me that her condition has gotten worse and doesn't think she'll make it to the end of the month. You interrupted that in order to get me to say something that sounded like "smell my poo". Forget being allowed into my house, you should be worried about being allowed into heaven. Hopefully as you walk home today, someone will murder you.

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Knock knock. Whos there? To get to the other side.

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Two women were sitting in silence.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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