What do homeless people get for Christmas? Nothing, they are homeless.

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Three blind men walk into a bar but they were unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from them would be exploitative.

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where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

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Penis

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What is x (4 - 10) + 6879 (333) x 678912345 - 9.87537 when x equals pi? Answer: YOUR FACE!!!

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what did one bum way to the other? we're shit out of luck

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Why is little Susie crying? Her entire family is dead.

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Knock knock Who's there? FBI

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How did the guy drown if he wasn't in water? A shark threw up on him

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why is my brother white and i am brown? the milk man is very fast!

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Knock knock? Whose there? Who's. Who's who? No you used the wrong form of who's.

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

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Why did the black guy walk into the supermarket and buy 100 bananas? Because he works at the zoo you racist!

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What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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¿Por qué seis de los siete miedo? ¡Porque siete ocho nueve!

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Benevolent villain.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing... she's ugly

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abortion, it really brings out the kid in you.

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if it's friday, it must be China

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Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

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Nero, what if you are using me now? Manipulating me? You think I enjoy falling in love after chatting with you in a site which is not even meant for chatting? You can do that, you are a "facilitator", I don't care as much for point zero, as I do care about you, hell, if things where different, id quit the whole thing to stay with you! I could say I will never forgive you if you make me feel safe by your side, accept your help only to get stabbed in the back for trusting you.

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Santa Clogged my toliet

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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What did the homosexual say to the purse walking down the street? - I'm a homosexual.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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