Knock Knock? Whos there? akward neighbor. akward neighbor who?

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its shoulders.

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Why'd the girl commit suicide? Because Justin Bieber admitted he was gay.

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Which of the following is NOT true? A. The lemon is walking to a store. B. The store is walking to a lemon. C. The man is a lemon and a store. D. Peanuts are stuck in my anus

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What do you call Jesus Christ? Jesus Christ.

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What did the sexually promiscuous man get for Christmas? AIDS.

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A man hanged himself, leaving a note. Nobody found him, nor the note. Nobody cared for him.

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Simon Cowell's hair is real.

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Penis

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Why....... Because.

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How do you kill a down-syndrome kid? fire.

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A man walks into a doctor's office. He is diagnosed with cancer. After three years he dies.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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There once was a genie With a sevenfoot weenie And he went to the lady next door She thought it was a snake So she hit it with a rake And then he murdered the shit out of her.

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I don't hate you because you're fat. You're fat because I hate you

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-What do you get when you graph the division of x by the square root of 69? - I don't know, what? -I was asking you, as my family's low economic status hinders my ability to buy a graphing calculator.

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A fish walks into a bar

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what do you call a black priest? holy shit!

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar He sits down and has some trouble reading the menu but orders a beer

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Why did Bob the Builder die? I threw a fridge at him

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What's the best part about seventeen-year-olds? There's seven of them.

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Why did the sprinter lose the race He had no legs

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What do you call 400 black men rolling down a hill? 400 black men rolling down a hill.

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How do you make a grilled cheese for a black guy? Butter two pieces of bread, place two slices of any kind of cheese in between the pieces of bread, then fry it in a pan with butter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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