I have the heart of a child... in a jar on my desk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken probably crossed the road because of some sort of impulse or external stimuli (most likely a bug or a worm located on the other side of the road) in which he or she responded to by proceeding to cross the road in order to get to the other side as chickens have a sense of cause to effect in which the effect would be consuming the bug or other living life form.

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where's waldo? in a picture book.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 1

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What did your father say before he died? Nothing, he's already dead

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What did the pig say to the banana? Oink.

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A man walks into a bar, he drinks, then leaves the bar.

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One day, Little Timmy asked his mother this question, "Mommy, why are boys and girls different?" She responded, "You're adopted and Santa Claus is dead."

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Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree Perpresher

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3 ducks are sitting in a pond. one with blonde feathers. one with brown feathers, and one with white feathers. A Transvestite Inbred Donkey Man kills them instantly.

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Why do women where make-up and perfume? because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he was dead.

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how do you wash clothes in the diswasher? you turn it on.

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What is 18 inches long and makes a woman scream all night? Crib death.

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What did Sally get for Christmas? Nothing, Sally is dead

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your mamas so old, her social security number is 1!

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What did one guy say to the other guy?? Well he just hi but hi backwards is ih and that reminded him of his days in Nahm because that's what his Sargent said and that reminded him of ice-cream because his Sargent smelled like ice-cream and that reminded him of the song that the ice-cream played which reminded him of Disney world which reminded him of a priest raping little boys which mad him laugh because that reminded him of a Jew picking up a penny which reminded him of Osama be shot in the f**k**g face and that reminded him to say how are you to the other guy.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running. From the forest. That hell hole. He had got away, but he could remember. The darkness. The silence. Until the unmistakable scream of the guns and then- The Running. The Screaming. The Blood, oh the blood. Seeing Charlie. Oh, that damned soul Charlie. The bullet went right- But that was long ago. So long. But sometimes, in the silence, Chicken remembers. The Running. The Screaming. The Blood. And he screams.

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What begins with "f" and ends with "uck"? A curse word.

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Guess what? Chicken butt

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A man walks into a bar.

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Your mother gets so hungry, she eats.

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whats the difference between santa claus and jewish people santa claus goes down the chimney and jewish people go up

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Today I had sex with a married man, but thats OK he's my husband

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops