What do black men do in the South? Hang around

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Why did the little girl fail her test? She had mental retardation.

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A Mexican and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have a couple drinks. Then they leave because it turns out that wasn't the bar they were meeting the Jew at.

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How do you estimate the number of jippos in an area? Take the dole's numbers from that area and measure how far away they are from the nearest council landfill site.

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throbbing slobber

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Waseem likes to talk with his mouth full.

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So I walked upstairs and I told the guy, "No." And he then asks, "Why?"

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? Tiger Woods is an American professional golfer whose achievements to date rank him among the most successful golfers of all time and Santa Claus is a very jolly fellow who brings gifts to the homes of the good children during the late evening and overnight hours of Christmas Eve.

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How do you check that you are not dreaming, but in actual fact, you are wide awake? Try to bite off our finger (this is actually possible, but the brain does not allow you to do it).

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Relax, and I do not mean as in hypnotic "relax as you do not not... Okay I used it again I am just joking" Nice, so are they like pretty doubles or not?

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Roses are green Violets are yellow I have mental problems Doobah haga Blakatrabbit

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why can't the black man get a job? The economy is suffering and unemployment rates are at an all time high

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What's the only part of a vegetable that you can't eat??? His wheelchair

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Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness ... Hello?

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When life gives you melons, you know you're dyslexic.

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The geese of Growmore

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Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

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What was the latino gardener doing? Working hard to keep his job in these tough economic times.

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What happens when you mix 3 pounds of baking soda, 2 dozen cans of Mr. Pibb cola, and a live tortoise? It makes a terrible mess and your wife gets upset at you for getting the house so dirty. She refuses to clean it up.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Yo' mama so stupid, she has a lower IQ than the average person.

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Why does my girlfriend pee standing up? Because he is a man.

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Q: What did the Miracle Whip say when the refrigerator door was opened? A: Nothing. Miracle Whip cannot speak.

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whats slower then a turtle A FATTY

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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