poop.........

chuck norris

Santa Clogged my toliet

Chuck Norris walks into a bar, the bartender, a known drug smuggler for the Mexican Cartel fires three shotgun rounds. As the bartender reloads Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks first the shotgun out of the man's hands followed by three very quick blows to the head. The bartender goes down unconscious and he is arrested. Though the program is no longer produced, Walker Texas Ranger was a somewhat enjoyable, although poorly written and low budgeted made for television action crime drama series produced from April 21, 1993 to May 19, 2001.

Think of a number between -1 and 1 That's how many friends you have

Q: What did the man with no arms and no legs receive for Christmas? A: Cancer

How do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the Brake

What do you call an anti joke website? http://anti-joke.com

Roses are red Violets are blue Get in the car or i'll shoot you

What's the difference between a porsche and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a porsche in my garage.

A fellow walks into a bar very down on himself, so he goes into the bathroom and hang himself from the pipes.

A: make me a sandwich woman! B: your a sandwich.

why did the man have solar panels on his house? because he had some money left over cos he won the lottery

What did one muffin say to the other? I don't know, but you need a psychiatrist.

What's the difference between Stevie Wonder and Kevin Bacon? There's none. Neither of them is a taxi driver.

One man said to another 'I think I'm going to have a chinese tonight.' the other replied 'it is wrong to eat people, even if they are chinese.'

Why did the black guy get arrested? Homicide.

Whats worse than one pregnancy scare... two pregnancy scares...whats worse than two pregnancy scares? being forced to having consensual sex with a grizzly bear.

An underaged man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, but the bartender says we don't serve minors. The boy then rushes out if the bar for fear of being caught.

whats blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF

Why are blonds so stupid? Because our society is insecure and we need a common denominator to pick on, so we can feel more comfortable with our mediocre lives.

Two black people passed me in an alley at night...... They said hi

When my Xbox died, my girlfriend said: "Finally, you can treat me the same way you treated that thing!" So I tapped her so hard that she died

Why was the baseball player arrested after stealing a base? Because he pulled out a knife and stabbed the shortstop in the chest.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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