Yeah, you cant make nukes without certain components which are illegal to come by, you know Iranian Uranium I believe, I still feel pretty ill, if you dont mind, lets change the subject. Say, does the word yellowcake mean anything to you?

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What's the difference between a bowl of cereal and a bowl of pudding? A bowl of cereal has milk in it.

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How many militant feminist does it take to change a lightbulb? 2, one to change the bulb and another to suck my dick.

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Whats red, green, and goes 60 mph? A frog in a blender.

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What does the Christian celebrate on Christmas? Christmas

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What's the difference between a kleenex and a man? One absorbs your tears while the other makes you cry.

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Yo mama's so fat, we are all extremely concerned for her health.

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what goes plop, plop, fizz, fizz? baby twins in an acid bath.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? I don't keep a Ferrari in my garage. (????)?

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Why did the man fall off the cliff? I don't know, I have mental AIDS.

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Why can't Tom go horse back riding? He is paralized from the neck down

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why are fire engines red? well books are red magazines are red 2 two plus two is four four times three is 12 there are 12 inches in a ruler queen elizabeth was a ruler, queen elizabeth was also a ship, ships sail in the sea fish swim in the sea, fish have fins, fins fought the russians, russians are always red, fire engines are always russian. and THAT is why fire engines are red....

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I'm Halarious.

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Bill: Did you hear about the black guy that went to college? John: No. Bill: me neither...

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what do u get when you cross a kangaroo and an elephant a genetically disformed animal comes out who dies shortly after

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A guy walks into a store and buys a sandwich.

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How do you keep an italian from talking? You duct tape his mouth.

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Why did the elf cry? Because someone stole his shoe.

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Why'd jimmy drop his candy wrapper? He was brutally melested and stabbed I the eyeballs with forks and cut into pieces before he could make it to the trash can. He was then thrown into the trash can he was going to.

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Three men walk into a bar because they were all blind.

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I know you are but what am I? A queer.

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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why did the guy with cancer die? because he had cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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