An Israeli, a Palestinian and an American walk into a bar. The Israeli shoots the Palestinian and says it was self defence. The American agrees with him.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? I don't keep a Ferrari in my garage. (????)?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was a self-absorbed prick. And, honestly, the chicken and the road weren't that great of friends anyway.

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What is black, white and hungry? A woman with a rare skin disorder known as Vitiligo which causes discolourtion of the skins pigment in patches; who is hungry.

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Why can't Tom go horse back riding? He is paralized from the neck down

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Why are anti jokes funny....cause morons come up with them...

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whats the difference between a mexican and an elevator? An elevator can raise a child.

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There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

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You wanna know what sucks about your face? . . Everything.

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I friended Paul Walker on Xbox, but he's always in the Dashboard.

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What's worse then the holocaust? Sphagetti trousers of mordor

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Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

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what do you a call quadriplegic man in a pile of leaves? Rustle

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Chuck Norris was a famous actor that starred in Walker, Texas Ranger and Missing in Action. He is a normal person, just like you and me.

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what's funnier than Norm Mcdonald? EVERY THING

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Horse tits

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Why did the bugger cross the rode? He was tired of getting picked on

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What does the English major do? Write anti-jokes because he has no job

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A man walks into a bar and orders some grapes. The bartender says he does not have any grapes available. The man leaves.

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Why did the little boy run away from Michael Jackson? Because he was scared

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A knock knock B who's there A your newborn give me your money or I will hang all your kids

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A gorilla walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a glass of celery. The bartender stands speechless due to the ridiculousness of the given situation.

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Knock knock. Who's? There Where? Right here.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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