Roses re red Violets are black You'd look better with a knife in your back

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Chuck Norris was a famous actor that starred in Walker, Texas Ranger and Missing in Action. He is a normal person, just like you and me.

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Why was the stress line down? Because now the population is one-hundred short of yesterday.

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What did the cancer patient get for Christmas? Nothing, cause he didn't make it till Christmas...

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What does the English major do? Write anti-jokes because he has no job

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So there are 2 ninjas in a dojo, The first ninja turns to the second ninja, and says something in Japanese

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You wanna know what sucks about your face? . . Everything.

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What does a cat sound like when it's being raped by a human? MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWW!

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Your mama's so fat she's going on weight-watchers to pursue a healthier lifestyle and avoid the longterm effects of obesity.

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A knock knock B who's there A your newborn give me your money or I will hang all your kids

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What happens when you read every anti-joke on anti-joke? You spend a lot of time in front of a screen. This means you should have a 10-15 minute break, so that your sinuses can rest and you don't develop a headache.

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whats the difference between a mexican and an elevator? An elevator can raise a child.

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I friended Paul Walker on Xbox, but he's always in the Dashboard.

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Whats the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair

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a couple argue and spend the night 96ing each other

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what did batman day to robin? get in the car robin.

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Why can't Micheal J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because there is no such person as Micheal J. Fox. Michael J. Fox, on the other hand, cannot draw a perfect circle because he has Parkinson's disease.

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What has three legs and bleeds? A cat with a cut off leg.

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what do you a call quadriplegic man in a pile of leaves? Rustle

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The farmer decided it was too cruel to fence in the animal, however getting run over by a car was a fate... not worse than death because it died.

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Your Mother is so kind that when I see her I say hello and ask her how she has been

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whats better than sex? cookies

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want to no whats funny what your mom

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A woman comes home and finds her husband with another woman. Their marriage collapses and the husband goes on to marry the other woman and his ex-wife commits suicide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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