Measurology: The measurement of your measure can measure the measurement of measures, along with measurements exceeding the measurements of measurement, with measures at the measurement of measuring measured measures. - ToFlyForU_28

Why did the man die in his office? Because a storm five miles away took down a power line that fell onto a truck igniting the fuel in it causing an explosion that started a forest fire that burned down another power line causing a spark to fly out of the man's phone and into his ear, killing him instantly.

A man walked into a bar...Ouch. He received a minor concussion from the impact of the cement wall of the building and a slight goose egg on his forehead.

Why did the black guy get fired from his job. I asked first.

What did the cancer patient get for Christmas? Nothing, cause he didn't make it till Christmas...

Your mama's so fat she's going on weight-watchers to pursue a healthier lifestyle and avoid the longterm effects of obesity.

Frogs with dislocated fingers....................................................CARROT

Why was the stress line down? Because now the population is one-hundred short of yesterday.

want to no whats funny what your mom

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

Roses re red Violets are black You'd look better with a knife in your back

why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? because i shot it.

a couple argue and spend the night 96ing each other

Penis.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was blind and deaf, which would e very unsafe to do.

A gorilla walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a glass of celery. The bartender stands speechless due to the ridiculousness of the given situation.

If I just post the same thing someone else posted and say it was mine, I'm gonna be really popular because everyone is too dumb to realize it's not my original work of genius.

2 scrubbers walk into a room , one says " can you you smell fresh-air spray"?

A knock knock B who's there A your newborn give me your money or I will hang all your kids

Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

What has three legs and bleeds? A cat with a cut off leg.

what do you a call quadriplegic man in a pile of leaves? Rustle

Why did the little boy run away from Michael Jackson? Because he was scared

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The farmer decided it was too cruel to fence in the animal, however getting run over by a car was a fate... not worse than death because it died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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