why did my girlfriend get pregnet? i didn's use a condom, and my semen entered her long muscular tube, also known as a vagina.

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Knock knock. Come in.

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What's more fun than nailing babies to a wall? Ripping them off again.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You touch yourself. I do, too.

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Wanna hear an inside joke? Cancer.

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What's black and blue and red all over? Due to the infinite nature of the universe many items both natural and manufactured could be described in this manner.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You just glass her.

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Q: what do you call a black guy on the moon A: An astronaut you resist bastard

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Ask me if I am an orange. "Are you an orange?" No.

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The jinx machine just stole your money... ... this poem was supposed to be funny

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Two guys jump off a cliff... the third guy calls an ambulance.

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "what can I get you?" The man replies "what do you recommend?" The bartender says "get a beer." The man says "okay."

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What did the african american ninja say to the jewish bartender? Can I have a beer?

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What did the 16 year old boy say to the obese girl who failed at typing? "sucks for you bitch-face."

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Guess what? You just lost the game.

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What's the best part of having sex with twenty-eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

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Why do women fake orgasms? Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane A pilot.

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A man walks into a bar and says "ouch". The nearby patrons ask him what is ailing him.

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Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Why couldn't Jimmy ride a bike Because Jimmy was a fish

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Why was sally crying? she was sad

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, Fuzzy Wuzzy had cancer.

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A women leaves the kitchen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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