what do you a call quadriplegic man in a pile of leaves? Rustle

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Your mama's so fat she's going on weight-watchers to pursue a healthier lifestyle and avoid the longterm effects of obesity.

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a couple argue and spend the night 96ing each other

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A woman comes home and finds her husband with another woman. Their marriage collapses and the husband goes on to marry the other woman and his ex-wife commits suicide.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The farmer decided it was too cruel to fence in the animal, however getting run over by a car was a fate... not worse than death because it died.

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What's the similarity between a plum and an elephant? Both are purple, except for the elephant.

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Roses are red violets are blue. I have amnesia so say hello to your nan when you get home

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Q1: How do you get an elephant to laugh? A1: Tell it a joke. Q2: How do you get a cow to laugh? A2: Cows can't laugh.

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no one walks in to a bar bar tender: shit!

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Your Mother is so kind that when I see her I say hello and ask her how she has been

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What goes in long and hard and comes out soft and sticky? Chewing Gum

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whats better than sex? cookies

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whats the difference between a mexican and an elevator? An elevator can raise a child.

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What's the difference between 2 flies? Their DNA

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What do you tell a 500 lb. Sumo wrestler who's eating your food? Stop eating my food.

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Penis.

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A jew walks into an Oven....

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why did the little boy cry? some gang killed his family infront of him.

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If I just post the same thing someone else posted and say it was mine, I'm gonna be really popular because everyone is too dumb to realize it's not my original work of genius.

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yo mamas like a spider always getting wrapped up in her own cu*

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2 scrubbers walk into a room , one says " can you you smell fresh-air spray"?

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what's funnier than Norm Mcdonald? EVERY THING

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Two muffins were in the oven. One muffin goes "whoo! It's getting hot in here!" the other muffin goes "ahhh! A talking muffin!!!"

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A gorilla walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a glass of celery. The bartender stands speechless due to the ridiculousness of the given situation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops