What's black, white and red all over and can't turn around in a corridor? A nun with a spear through her

whats the difference between a mexican and an elevator? An elevator can raise a child.

If I just post the same thing someone else posted and say it was mine, I'm gonna be really popular because everyone is too dumb to realize it's not my original work of genius.

Q1: How do you get an elephant to laugh? A1: Tell it a joke. Q2: How do you get a cow to laugh? A2: Cows can't laugh.

A gorilla walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a glass of celery. The bartender stands speechless due to the ridiculousness of the given situation.

What happens when you read every anti-joke on anti-joke? You spend a lot of time in front of a screen. This means you should have a 10-15 minute break, so that your sinuses can rest and you don't develop a headache.

What has three legs and bleeds? A cat with a cut off leg.

What do you tell a 500 lb. Sumo wrestler who's eating your food? Stop eating my food.

yo mamas like a spider always getting wrapped up in her own cu*

What does a cat sound like when it's being raped by a human? MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWW!

A woman comes home and finds her husband with another woman. Their marriage collapses and the husband goes on to marry the other woman and his ex-wife commits suicide.

what's funnier than Norm Mcdonald? EVERY THING

Roses are red violets are blue. I have amnesia so say hello to your nan when you get home

whats better than sex? cookies

Knock knock. Who's? There Where? Right here.

Why was the woman crying I kick her in the ass really really really hard... With steal toe boots... That had a spike on them... That was biped in poison... And man did she scream.

Knock knock. Who's there? To get the other side!

What's worse than sitting in a car that's steered by a woman? Sitting in an airplane steered by a suicidal pilot.

What's the similarity between a plum and an elephant? Both are purple, except for the elephant.

What's the difference between 6 and 7? 1.

what do you call a man with blue eyes??? a man with blue eyes

Horse tits

Two muffins were in the oven. One muffin goes "whoo! It's getting hot in here!" the other muffin goes "ahhh! A talking muffin!!!"

What do you call something with no legs or arms swimming in the lake? A fish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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