Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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What happens when you read every anti-joke on anti-joke? You spend a lot of time in front of a screen. This means you should have a 10-15 minute break, so that your sinuses can rest and you don't develop a headache.

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roses are grey violets are grey everything is? grey i'm colour blind fml

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Whats the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair

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Two muffins were in the oven. One muffin goes "whoo! It's getting hot in here!" the other muffin goes "ahhh! A talking muffin!!!"

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Roses are red violets are blue. I have amnesia so say hello to your nan when you get home

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What do you tell a 500 lb. Sumo wrestler who's eating your food? Stop eating my food.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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A jew walks into an Oven....

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What do you call something with no legs or arms swimming in the lake? A fish.

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What's the similarity between a plum and an elephant? Both are purple, except for the elephant.

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why did the little boy cry? some gang killed his family infront of him.

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What did the cancer patient get for Christmas? Nothing, cause he didn't make it till Christmas...

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Your mama's so fat she's going on weight-watchers to pursue a healthier lifestyle and avoid the longterm effects of obesity.

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What is the saddest part of a Jew's life? The fact that every single day the world turns more and more 'jokingly' anti-semetic until the point that the Jewish people have become so overwhelmed by depression that they begin committing suicide until the point of Jewish extinction.

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What has three legs and bleeds? A cat with a cut off leg.

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whats the difference between a mexican and an elevator? An elevator can raise a child.

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You wanna know what sucks about your face? . . Everything.

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A woman comes home and finds her husband with another woman. Their marriage collapses and the husband goes on to marry the other woman and his ex-wife commits suicide.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The farmer decided it was too cruel to fence in the animal, however getting run over by a car was a fate... not worse than death because it died.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was blind and deaf, which would e very unsafe to do.

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How many men does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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Why was the alpaca sad He just got raped

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Chuck Norris was a famous actor that starred in Walker, Texas Ranger and Missing in Action. He is a normal person, just like you and me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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