What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13 for violence and brief nudity.

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Why does kelly keep going on about breasts ? cus shes into chicks !!!

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Why did the bugger cross the rode? He was tired of getting picked on

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What's black, white and red all over and can't turn around in a corridor? A nun with a spear through her

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What's the only type of wood that doesn't float? Natalie wood.

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What did the cancer patient get for Christmas? Nothing, cause he didn't make it till Christmas...

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Two muffins were in the oven. One muffin goes "whoo! It's getting hot in here!" the other muffin goes "ahhh! A talking muffin!!!"

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What do you tell a 500 lb. Sumo wrestler who's eating your food? Stop eating my food.

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Penis.

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Why couldn't Ray Charles read? Because he was blind.

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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What happens when you read every anti-joke on anti-joke? You spend a lot of time in front of a screen. This means you should have a 10-15 minute break, so that your sinuses can rest and you don't develop a headache.

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whats better than sex? cookies

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You know how geese fly in a V formation and sometimes one side is longer than the other. Do you know why that is? Because there are more geese on that side.

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Why was Jimmy afraid of coming out of the closet? He had agoraphobia.

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Why did Ralph fall off the swing He was distracted because he had a perfect view of the twin towers when 9-11 was happening

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What's the difference between 2 flies? Their DNA

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why didnt the boys drink the coffee? because she coughed on it

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What does a cat sound like when it's being raped by a human? MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWW!

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What goes in long and hard and comes out soft and sticky? Chewing Gum

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What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? Me :'(

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A man walks in to a bar, the bartender asks "what will it be?" The man says i don't know, what will it be?"

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A man came up to me and said," you suck" You know what I told him "YOU SUCK!"

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want to no whats funny what your mom

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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