What goes in long and hard and comes out soft and sticky? Chewing Gum

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What happens when you read every anti-joke on anti-joke? You spend a lot of time in front of a screen. This means you should have a 10-15 minute break, so that your sinuses can rest and you don't develop a headache.

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A woman comes home and finds her husband with another woman. Their marriage collapses and the husband goes on to marry the other woman and his ex-wife commits suicide.

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Two muffins were in the oven. One muffin goes "whoo! It's getting hot in here!" the other muffin goes "ahhh! A talking muffin!!!"

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When life gives you lemons... you probably just found lemons...

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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what did batman day to robin? get in the car robin.

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What's black, white and red all over and can't turn around in a corridor? A nun with a spear through her

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What smells worse than a skunk? A dead skunk.

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yo mamas like a spider always getting wrapped up in her own cu*

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What do you tell a 500 lb. Sumo wrestler who's eating your food? Stop eating my food.

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Why did the bugger cross the rode? He was tired of getting picked on

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Why couldn't Ray Charles read? Because he was blind.

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What's the only type of wood that doesn't float? Natalie wood.

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whats better than sex? cookies

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Why doesn't the mexican have a job? Grad school is taking up too much of his time.

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13 for violence and brief nudity.

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A man walks in to a bar, the bartender asks "what will it be?" The man says i don't know, what will it be?"

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Why was Jimmy afraid of coming out of the closet? He had agoraphobia.

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derp

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want to no whats funny what your mom

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Q: Why does the blonde have the biggest tits in the third grade? A: Because she's 21

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What's the difference between 2 flies? Their DNA

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what do you call a man with blue eyes??? a man with blue eyes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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