Why can't Micheal J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because there is no such person as Micheal J. Fox. Michael J. Fox, on the other hand, cannot draw a perfect circle because he has Parkinson's disease.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didnt a black guy ate him.

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Roses are red violets are blue. I have amnesia so say hello to your nan when you get home

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When life gives you lemons... you probably just found lemons...

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What goes in long and hard and comes out soft and sticky? Chewing Gum

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What's black, white and red all over and can't turn around in a corridor? A nun with a spear through her

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What happens when you read every anti-joke on anti-joke? You spend a lot of time in front of a screen. This means you should have a 10-15 minute break, so that your sinuses can rest and you don't develop a headache.

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Knock knock. Who's there? To get the other side!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, Knock. Who's there? ........Chicken...?

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Knock knock. Who's? There Where? Right here.

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What does a cat sound like when it's being raped by a human? MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWW!

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What's the difference between 2 flies? Their DNA

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Fine then, its me Tifa, I am sorry for going against your ideology, I was trying to emulate and copy you, but yeah... Bad thing is that yeah I taught these concepts to a real shitload of people Nero, on the bright side, its not much compared to what you know. Sorry for being all rude, but thirty something? I mean I never seen your face nor even the color of your skin Mr Doctor Doom, but you always struck me as very, very old. I kinda appreciate you calling me the girl with the big red scared eyes, most people call me you know, most people never look me in the eyes, not that I really blame them.

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Horse tits

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what do you call a man with blue eyes??? a man with blue eyes

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Q1: How do you get an elephant to laugh? A1: Tell it a joke. Q2: How do you get a cow to laugh? A2: Cows can't laugh.

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What do you tell a 500 lb. Sumo wrestler who's eating your food? Stop eating my food.

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A man walks into a bar and orders some grapes. The bartender says he does not have any grapes available. The man leaves.

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no one walks in to a bar bar tender: shit!

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Why was the woman crying I kick her in the ass really really really hard... With steal toe boots... That had a spike on them... That was biped in poison... And man did she scream.

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What's worse than sitting in a car that's steered by a woman? Sitting in an airplane steered by a suicidal pilot.

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Knock knock! "Who's there?" "It's me, xx" "Okay, come in."

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Why does kelly keep going on about breasts ? cus shes into chicks !!!

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Q: Why does the blonde have the biggest tits in the third grade? A: Because she's 21

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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