How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? Well that would be crude and insensitive to ask a person with dementia to do a task so easily performed by a person who is not non compos mentis.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

To pen state administraters walk into a butt

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock, knock. Who's there? Nick. Nick who? Nick Wyatt

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How did two Jews react when they saw a quarter on the sidewalk? They agreed to donate it to charity.

thumb_up thumb_down

knock knock come in

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the indian man take the peanuts out of his lunch? Because he's allergic.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the blonde stare at the carton of orange juice? Because she was lost in her thoughts about her dead husband, and how much he loved orange juice.

thumb_up thumb_down

What happened to the little kid sitting next to a fat kid ? The little kid got DEVOURED

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why didn't Dave buy his wife a watch for her birthday? Because she already had one.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A mushroom walks into a bar, the bartender says, "We don't serve your kind." the mushroom asked why, the Bartender said, "Because your under aged"

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Roses are red Violets are blue And so does your mom…

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Bing

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A black man, a mexican man and a chinese man all walk into a supermarket. Together, they purchase ingredients to make a delicious vegetarian lasagna. That night, they make the lasagna and greatly enjoy it together.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's similar about a black person and an apple? Nothing, an apple is a fruit. It has nothing to do with hanging from trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Three men walked into a metal pole

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, dogs can't speak English.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Two men are sitting in a bar. They finish their drinks and pay the bill before leaving.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

chuck norris

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats worse than having no mother? Having no mother and father, enabling you to have to support a family at the age of 12, using the allowance that your parents are supposed to give you once a week.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Knock Knock Business Man: Who's There? Al Qeada Business Man: Al Qeada who? Al Qeada is flying an airplane into your building Then a commercial airplane flew into the oddly placed door on the 95th floor of the North Tower. That's how 9/11 happened. Have a nice day.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Hey your name is really Tifa? Sorry, I hate scheming, but in this kind of situation I have to play things safe, I have a wife to take care off, I mean it, I really hate it. Anyway, I got your number, location everything, now if you did send people to harm or even worse kill me, you wont be doing that again, trust me, if I die of an assault, you die next, whoever you are.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: What did the man with no arms and no legs receive for Christmas? A: Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what did the nazi say to the jew? hi

thumb_up thumb_down -16

123456789

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops