Q: What did the man with no arms and no legs receive for Christmas? A: Cancer

why are their no mexicans in hell they all jumped the border

Why did the Jew pick up the penny? Because he dropped it

abortion, it really brings out the kid in you.

Why was the little boy's head so big? He had a tumor in his brain.

One orphan said to the other, 'what are your parents called'

What's the best thing about sex with 24 year olds? They're in their sexual prime.

Why did the women cover up her vaginal area? She was with her friends, queefed, and was extremely self conscious.

wanna hear a joke yo mamma just died

What is the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry Potter escapes the chamber.

What's worse than finding gum stuck on the bottom of your desk? A clown following you around carrying a shotgun and throwing toothbrushes at you.

How do you put an elephant in the refrigerator? Open the door and let him in. How do you put a giraffe in the refrigerator? Open the door and let the elephant out then give the giraffe a reasonable amount of time to enter.

ur mother

What happened to the chicken who crossed the road ? Quite obviously he got to the other side to be greeted by a 50 foot half man half chicken who had one leg.

Why couldn't the woman go grocery shopping? She was paralyzed from the neck down.

throbbing slobber

what did the duck say to the dog. quack

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

Why was the baseball player arrested after stealing a base? Because he pulled out a knife and stabbed the shortstop in the chest.

What did the bullied schoolboy do when he got home from school? He cried himself to sleep.

The WNBA

If Vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat? Probably both plant life, sea-based creatures, and land-based animals. However, depending on the personal preference of the person, they can also be a vegetarian or not. They could also be cannibals, but the literal definition of humanitarian would go against any cannibalistic traditions due to the fact that humanitarians help others for the benefit of humanity as a whole, eating people would go against such beliefs.

Niko isnt a mexican douche

why did the mother beat the young boy? Because he was adopted

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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