Q: where did the pickle live? A: In the desert

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Think of a number between -1 and 1 That's how many friends you have

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what did the nazi say to the jew? hi

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Teacher: Maria please point to America on the map. Maria: This is it. Teacher: Well done. Now class, who found America? Class: Maria did.

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marble

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What's long, hard and full of seamen? A submarine.

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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why were there moans coming from the sandusky household Mike sandusky, was having sex with his beutiful wife, maria meanwhile Mike's cousin, jerry was sitting in a jail cell

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I JUST HAD SEEX! How blantant, eh?

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A: make me a sandwich woman! B: your a sandwich.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? I was eating an orange in the park last week when I saw four men brutally murdered before my very eyes.

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your moms so fat she has a heart attack when she walks to the pantry.

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wanna hear a joke yo mamma just died

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Why did the 1,000 pound woman start crying? Because her son got hit by a car.

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What's the difference between Stevie Wonder and Kevin Bacon? There's none. Neither of them is a taxi driver.

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What is the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry Potter escapes the chamber.

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A plane carries 500 bricks. 1 falls out. How many bricks are left? 499. How do you put an elephant in a fridge in 3 steps? Open the fridge, put in the elephant, and close the fridge. How do you put a deer in a fridge in 4 steps? Open the fridge, take out the elephant, put in the deer, then close the fridge. The Lion King is having a party. All the animals are there except for one; who is it? The deer: He is still in the fridge. An old lady is crossing a swamp, but it is a crocodile swamp. How does she cross? Normally, all the crocodiles are at the Lion King's party The old lady dies at the edge of the swamp. How? A brick falls from the sky and kills her.

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Did you see that van with the word "Free Candy" painted on it? I'm also glad to see a successful entrepreneur capable of advertising free wares as an incentive to attract customers in such a recession. It's a great deal for both parties.

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Q. why didnt the boy get a christmas present from his dear grandmother? A. because she died on thanksgiving

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Your momma's of a reasonable figure and weight.

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GooglePlus.

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whats blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF

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Two muffings are in an oven. One leans towards the other due to rising of the batter and says nothing. The other cupcake, unable to yield the cognitive process to speak utters nothing and cooks to an internal temperature of 175 C.

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What do black men do in the South? Hang around

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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