How did the guy drown if he wasn't in water? A shark threw up on him

What do you not want to get when playing scrabble? Diarrhea

If TACOS are Mexican PASTA is Italian HAMBURGER is American Then what is pizza???..... Dough, Cheese and Sauce Just Kidding, that was bad..... Turtles..... :D

A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some chapstick, put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because as all people know, Ducks cannot speak, however, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need chapstick anyway, since he has no lips.

Come in

your family is so poor that you require healthcare to recieve money

What is x (4 - 10) + 6879 (333) x 678912345 - 9.87537 when x equals pi? Answer: YOUR FACE!!!

Benevolent villain.

Why did a hipster walks into a health food store? To buy some healthy food.

25

What's 6+2? 16

What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, dogs can't speak English.

What do you call 3 horses in 1 boat, in the middle of the Dead Sea? Lost

Two men are sitting in a bar. They finish their drinks and pay the bill before leaving.

What's the differance between a pile of leaves and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a pile of leaves burning in my backyard.

Why did the Jew pick up the penny? Because he dropped it

why are their no mexicans in hell they all jumped the border

Q: What did the man with no arms and no legs receive for Christmas? A: Cancer

abortion, it really brings out the kid in you.

Why was the little boy's head so big? He had a tumor in his brain.

Why was the little Latino boy sad? Because his father sexually molested him earlier in the evening.

One orphan said to the other, 'what are your parents called'

What's the best thing about sex with 24 year olds? They're in their sexual prime.

why did the man have solar panels on his house? because he had some money left over cos he won the lottery

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...