arse

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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why did susie get hit by the bus? cause the bus driver wanted her ice cream

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Why do Africans live in slums Because they have aids

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Knock Knock Whos there? The IRS *locking noise*

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An Englishman, Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a pub where they are presented with a situation, the Englishman and Scotsman react appropriately but the Irishman does something foolish.

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What did the cheese say to his friend, who was also a cheese, before the cheese took a picture? ''Cheese''.

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Last night I had consensual sex with my long term girlfriend in the missionary position. It lasted approximately 4 minutes before I ejaculated into the durex extra safe condom.

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A black person in the NHL

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What do you get when you cross Arsene Wenger with Darth Vader? Arsene Vader

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A man walks into a pole and freezes to death.

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cheese

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what did the black man do for his family? nothing

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What do you call a brunette between two blonds? Probably their friend. How should I know?

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Q: What do you call a gray box without a joke in it? A: I don't know but you'd better think of something.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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Q: why did the plain crash A: because the driver was a loaf of bread

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Whats the differance between peanut butter and jam? You can't peanut butter your dick into a chicks ass.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he felt like it.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick

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Why did a man get arrested in a bar He was covered in bombs and charged with terrorism

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steves legs

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What do you call a person trying to save his interprise from partaking in a financial collapse by binging on alcohal? An alcoholic.

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what's the difference between babies and a trampoline? I take my shoes off to jump on a trampoline.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops