A black guy walks in to a bar.

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Why did the burglar rob the bank? because he needed money due to the economic decline.

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what do you call the one eyed man in the land of the blind? You call him an outcast

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper with some red stuff on it.

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What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun. What did Santa get for the young boys sister? Nothing, the boy shot Santa. Who sent out presents the next Christmas? Not Santa.

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Why does my girlfriend pee standing up? Because he is a man.

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Your momma is SOO FAT that I had to call my doctor. He said you should go on a diet and exercise. I called my local gym and gave your mom a 3 months membership. Monday to Friday. Your welcome and good luck.

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what do you call someone that ran into a wall hurt

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How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? If you need an electrician to screw in a lightbulb, you're a moron.

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Why was poor justin killed His mother kicked him into a pool of blood-thirsty aligators.

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What's worse than being named Troy Merrill? Being Black.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken probably crossed the road because of some sort of impulse or external stimuli (most likely a bug or a worm located on the other side of the road) in which he or she responded to by proceeding to cross the road in order to get to the other side as chickens have a sense of cause to effect in which the effect would be consuming the bug or other living life form.

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why are these jokes so funny? why are u so fat bitch

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How do you know that a woman is having an orgasm? They go like OH YAH OH YAH:D

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What did the twin towers get at the pizza place? 2 planes

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How do you keep a woman entertained? A delightful romantic comedy

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There once was a rich man who owned a really big mansion, he's a very organised man and likes routine, every day at 6.30pm he goes for an hour long jog. One day he goes out for his jog, when he gets back his mansion is on fire and he can see a little orange man running away in the distance. But he thinks nothing of it. The man has lost a lot of money, but can still afford to move into a slighty smaller, yet still very large house. The next day he goes out for his jog and when he gets back his big house is on fire and again, he sees the little orange man running away in the distance. He thinks nothing of it, but has now lost even more money, and has to move into a regular size house. The next day he goes out for his jog, when he gets back his house is on fire and again he sees the little orange man running away in the distance. He thinks nothing of it and has lost even more money. He is really gutted by this point and now has to move into a single bedroom flat. The next day he goes out for his jog, when he gets back his flat is on fire and again he sees a little orange man running away in the distance. He still thinks nothing of it and has now lost all his money, and has to move into a cardboard box under a bridge. The next day he goes out for his jog, when he gets back his cardboard box is on fire and again he sees a little orange man running away in the distance. He is sick of this and decides to chase the little orange man. When he catches him he tackles him to the ground, turns him over and asks.. did you burn down my mansion, my big house, my average sized house, my flat, and my box? The little orange man replies no.

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What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza? One is a popular Italian food and the other is a human being.

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Hey! did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she...

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What do you call a cool pig? SPIDER-PIG!!!

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Why did the lion get lost? -The jungle is massive

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a man eats at a restaraunt alone, because all the people he loved died in a tragic boating accident while he was out of town on a business trip

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Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducked.

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What did one deer say to the other? Nothing. The second deer was killed while they were eating and now the first deer is scarred dot life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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