Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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why did the bird fall out of the sky? it had been shot by a bird hunter, as it was bird season.

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What happens if you're in the middle of counting towels? You finish counting your towels.

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Why did a man get arrested in a bar He was covered in bombs and charged with terrorism

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Why was the man running from the cops? His car broke down.

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Men's rights

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he felt like it.

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What do homeless people get for Christmas? Nothing, they are homeless.

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whats the diffference between pizza and a jew? burning a pizza makes me sad, burning a jew is worthy of a party!

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What happened to the little kid sitting next to a fat kid ? The little kid got DEVOURED

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A mushroom walks into a bar, the bartender says, "We don't serve your kind." the mushroom asked why, the Bartender said, "Because your under aged"

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What do you not want to get when playing scrabble? Diarrhea

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How do you keep black people out of your back yard? Just like you would anyone else: buy a dog.

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Your mom is so fat she beat up snorlax from pokémon, than got charged for abbuse because it is illegal to use physical violence on pokémon unless in a battle or in attempt to capture one.

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Three men walked into a metal pole

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Your mother is so fat that unfortunately she can not fit into her picture for her passport and is not allowed to leave the country to go visit her dying mother.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a big dick, Lets have sex.

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A man runs into a bar and warns everyone about the hurricane.

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How come the twin boys wanted to climb a tree for fun today? Because They both wanted to commit suicide...

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Hey your name is really Tifa? Sorry, I hate scheming, but in this kind of situation I have to play things safe, I have a wife to take care off, I mean it, I really hate it. Anyway, I got your number, location everything, now if you did send people to harm or even worse kill me, you wont be doing that again, trust me, if I die of an assault, you die next, whoever you are.

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Knock Knock Business Man: Who's There? Al Qeada Business Man: Al Qeada who? Al Qeada is flying an airplane into your building Then a commercial airplane flew into the oddly placed door on the 95th floor of the North Tower. That's how 9/11 happened. Have a nice day.

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9/11 was a shocking time for all of us.

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What's more satistfying then good sex? A nice loud, stinky fart.

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Statutory Rape.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops