If Pythagoras was racist, he would have made hypotenuses.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Roses are red Violets are blue I need some money.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q. Why cant Stephen Hawking walk into a bar? A. Because he suffered being paralyzed and is unable to walk. So theoretically speaking it is impossible to walk when paralyzed and in a wheelchair unless the victim is out of his or her wheelchair. Please note that the chances of walking when paralyzed are extremely slim.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did Sally Fall Off The Swing? She had no arms Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why was the little boy's head so big? He had a tumor in his brain.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted to see his mother before she passed away of terminal cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A fellow walks into a bar very down on himself, so he goes into the bathroom and hang himself from the pipes.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A Muslim, a Jew, a Christian, and an Atheist are eating at the same table. They are friends, and they do this from time to time.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the women cover up her vaginal area? She was with her friends, queefed, and was extremely self conscious.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What did one muffin say to the other? I don't know, but you need a psychiatrist.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

A dyslexic man walks into a bra but like he actually did not a bar a womens breats.

thumb_up thumb_down -72

What does spongebob do to get high. Nothing, spongebob doesnt exsist.

thumb_up thumb_down -78

Whats worse than one pregnancy scare... two pregnancy scares...whats worse than two pregnancy scares? being forced to having consensual sex with a grizzly bear.

thumb_up thumb_down -114

How do you put an elephant in the refrigerator? Open the door and let him in. How do you put a giraffe in the refrigerator? Open the door and let the elephant out then give the giraffe a reasonable amount of time to enter.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

Why are blonds so stupid? Because our society is insecure and we need a common denominator to pick on, so we can feel more comfortable with our mediocre lives.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

what did the duck say to the dog. quack

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Humpty dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty dumpty had a big fall. All the king's horses and all the king's men did not come to help him because the United States does not have a patriarchal system of government.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

A pregnant woman takes the bus, once inside she realizes that there are no seats. No one was pollite enough to let her sit down so she felt pretty uncomfortable on the way home.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

A black policeman and a white policeman work different shifts, one is during the day and one is at night and the both get equal pay.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What do you call a retarded man? Nothing, because it's inappropriate to call retarded people names.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What happend when Chuck Norris did a push up? He did one push up.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What do you call a monkey? A monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

husband; do you come here often wife: i live here

thumb_up thumb_down +37

That's what he said.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops