A Man walks into a bar and orders a scotch. His alcoholism is tearing his family apart

Q:Whats the difference between a dead dog and a dead baby? A:The dog has skidmarks in front of it -RDV

An Irishman stays home

Hello

why is there a hole in the wall, i hope a prehistoric mole doesnt come out of that hole in the ball CC

What is the difference between a man and a woman? Genitals

what did the man with no legs get for Christmas? A piano

What did the cheese say to his friend, who was also a cheese, before the cheese took a picture? ''Cheese''.

beiber i straight

One time I was playing hide and seek with grandma but I couldn't seem to find her. I asked my sister for help and she told me she was hiding in the living room on the shelf. I went into the living room but all I saw was a vase on the shelf. Grandma probably didn't know the game was over so I opened the vase to tell her. To this day she hasn't come out of the vase.

What do you call a black person in a pool? A black person swimming.

What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

Billy was walking along the sidewalk. He strayed into someone's yard. He got run over by a lawnmower because he couldn't see with the frog he had stapled to his face.

Knock Knock. F uck off.

Q: Why is winter the best season? A: It eliminates the homeless.

i went to have a wank over anime as well yesterday, the i realised i dont have a penis. -adam fantuzzi

when does the phrase "time heals all wounds" not apply? to people with fatal wounds.

Why would you throw a hooker in a lake? To go fishing

How come Jimmy didn't take his math test? Dead babies can't take math tests!

What does a good joke get for Christmas? no laughs.

#FEARtheFLAMINGOS

Why couldn't santa eat cookies and milk at little Jimmy's house? He has diabetes and is unable to stray from a strict diet prescribed by his local doctor.

Why wasn't Pat able to get an erection? Because Pat is a girl.

Three black guys walk into a gym and play a rigorous game of basketball for an hour

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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