What happens when you mix 3 pounds of baking soda, 2 dozen cans of Mr. Pibb cola, and a live tortoise? It makes a terrible mess and your wife gets upset at you for getting the house so dirty. She refuses to clean it up.

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Whats the difference between christians and nazis? one suppressed human rights and caused millions of deaths. the others were responsible for the holocaust.

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A black policeman and a white policeman work different shifts, one is during the day and one is at night and the both get equal pay.

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whats slower then a turtle A FATTY

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A man walks into a store, and says to the cashier: "I'd like to buy 6 fridges". The cashier says: "Why do you need that many fridges?" The man says: "I'm an antelope!"

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What do gay horses eat?........ Cheese

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Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and smell

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That's what he said.

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Chocolate rain Awesome!

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i like potatoes But only mashed baked are a little bad they arent tasty. I like food good because food bad can really hurt me

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I'm gay. Great me too.

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Whats big, hairy, and super long? My big toe you pervert.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Whats big, tall and fat? Most of America.

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The chicken came before the egg. Because eggs are an unborn chicken, and it is impossible for an unborn chicken to ejaculate.

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AROUND

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Why does Michael Jackson like K-mart? He does not; he is dead.

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when the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's a black eye.

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How do you win a war? Drop a fridge on your enemies.

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What did the twin towers get at the pizza place? 2 planes

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A hiker gets lost on a trail and ends up wondering deep into the woods. He comes upon an amish farm. He knocks on the door and an amish man answers. The hiker explains his predicament, and the amish man says "sure you can stay in barn, but promise me one thing, don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course I won't". He then goes to the barn. Right before the hiker falls asleep. The amish farmer comes in and says "make sure you don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course not". So the next morning the hiker is rested, well fed and is about to leave when the amish man approaches and says, "Thank you being decent and christian like."

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milly, milly, milly, cat

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A baby seal walks into a club

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What's green and eats rocks? A green rock-eater.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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