Why did the girl not apply for her American CItizenship? She was already an American Citizen.

thumb_up thumb_down -48

One man said to another 'I think I'm going to have a chinese tonight.' the other replied 'it is wrong to eat people, even if they are chinese.'

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Roses are white Violets are white I did it in the garden

thumb_up thumb_down -50

What's big, black and long? The line in KFC

thumb_up thumb_down -92

Why are blonds so stupid? Because our society is insecure and we need a common denominator to pick on, so we can feel more comfortable with our mediocre lives.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

A black man, hispanic man, and white man walk in to a bar. They are all friends. They enjoy a few beers together then call a taxi to take them home because it is irresponsible to operate a motor vehicle while under the influence of alcohol or other drugs.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

Knock Knock Whos there? smell map smell map who?...really? I was in the middle of a phone call with my paraplegic wife's doctor, who was telling me that her condition has gotten worse and doesn't think she'll make it to the end of the month. You interrupted that in order to get me to say something that sounded like "smell my poo". Forget being allowed into my house, you should be worried about being allowed into heaven. Hopefully as you walk home today, someone will murder you.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Whats the difference between your mother and a mallard with a cold? There are far to many differences between humans and birds to consider for this question. A small list might include wings, feathers, and mating habits to name a few.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What's the only part of a vegetable that you can't eat??? His wheelchair

thumb_up thumb_down +45

"What starts with F and ends with a K?" "firetruck?" "no, f u c k"

thumb_up thumb_down +43

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar, and have a stimulating discussion about economics

thumb_up thumb_down +43

why does andy thomson speak that slow because he speaks that way

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What's worse than being named Troy Merrill? Being Black.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Knock Knock. Who's there? Your worst nightmare!! Ohh.... Do come in it's raining outside.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

thumb_up thumb_down +39

How do you starve colored people? deny them food stamps

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What do you call a banana that's about to be eaten? A Banana

thumb_up thumb_down +37

A black policeman and a white policeman work different shifts, one is during the day and one is at night and the both get equal pay.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch!" Passersby notice the man is blind, which caused him not to notice the bar. He later died in the hospital from severe head trauma

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Q: What did the Miracle Whip say when the refrigerator door was opened? A: Nothing. Miracle Whip cannot speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

There's a American, Mexican, and a Canadian stranded in the desert. They couldn't find any food, water, and shelter. They were all really hungry and thirsty. Later that day the Mexican dies from a very bad infection on his neck.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What is the hardest part of a vegtable? The wheel chair 0.o

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A farmer goes out to the coop to feed the chickens. They're all dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What do you call someone who's black? A person you asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops