What do gay horses eat?........ Cheese

What runs faster than a dead baby? Almost everything.

Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and smell

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind.

A black policeman and a white policeman work different shifts, one is during the day and one is at night and the both get equal pay.

Whats the difference between christians and nazis? one suppressed human rights and caused millions of deaths. the others were responsible for the holocaust.

Why are "Polish" and "polish" spelled the same? The word is a homophone.

Whats a good source of iron? A piece of iron.

A man walked into a bar and suffered a mild concusion.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Hodor

I'm gay. Great me too.

Why did the old man die? Because everyone dies

what is white and sticky? glue.

So Mel Gibson walks into a bar, and then everyone left.

What is black, white, and red all over? Obviusly a sunburned panguin.

What has two legs and is red all over? Half a cat.

Why did sally fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

there are two hicks named Billy Bob and Joe. Billy Bob decides to go to college so he goes to sign up for classes. The Dean of the school decides to help him out and tells him he will be taking math, writing, and logic. Billy Bob is okay with the math and writing but then asks "what the hell is logic?" The Dean thinks for a moment and then says "Okay for example, do you have a weedwacker?" Billy Bob says "yeah i got a weed wacker" so then Dean says "So that probably means you have a yard." Billy Bob goes "yeah i got a yard" So the Dean says "so if youve got a yard you've probably got a house." Billy Bob goes "hell ya i got a house!" The Dean says "and if youve got a house that probably means you've got a wife." Billy Bob goes "ya! i got a wife" so the Dean says "If you have a wife then that means you are heterosexual" and Billy Bob goes "of course im heterosexual!" So the Dean goes "See Billy Bob, thats logic." Amazed by this, Billy Bob goes back to Joe and starts to tell him about his classes. He explains he will be taking math, writing and logic. Joe is confused so he asked Billy Bob "what the hell is logic!?" Billy Bob thinks for a moment and goes "okay how can i explain this....okay joe, do you have a weed wacker?" and Joe responds "no Billy Bob i dont got a week wacker..." Billy Bob: "I KNEW YOU WAS A HOMOSEXUAL!"

There once was a genie With a sevenfoot weenie And he went to the lady next door She thought it was a snake So she hit it with a rake And then he murdered the shit out of her.

Hey, did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No He didn't either.

What do you get when you make a website to put jokes on? People repeating the same joke over and over again, and still managing to get good ratings.

Why did the mechanic sleep under a car? He had narcolepsy.

milly, milly, milly, cat

Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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