Why is one side of a geese formation heading south always longer than the other? It has more geese

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Shes dead.

if life gives u lemons....chuck them back and say u wanted muffins instead!!!!!!!!!!!

What's worse than being named Troy Merrill? Being Black.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Dandelions are yellow, and so are sunflowers.

How did Peter Parker tell his uncle that he was Spiderman? He didn't because he was already dead.

Q: Whatcha doin?? A:Ur mom. . .

How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Two.

That's what he said.

Three blind mice walk into a bar, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative

Why....... Because.

why are elephants gray? to tell them apart from blueberries.

What do you call a diving-board factory worker threatening to jump off the roof? Names.

What do you do to a duck with no bill? Please, leave the duck alone, it's bad enough for him having no bill.

How do you win a war? Drop a fridge on your enemies.

what do you call someone that is dying of malaria? someone that should consider visiting a doctor.

What do you call a man which busts ghosts A ghostbuster. Duh

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

The size of Idris Elba's penis

Why did the chicken cross the road? A manufacturing defect in the chain link fence released several chickens who are now freely roaming the area.

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinson's Disease which causes his hands to shake uncontrollably thus making drawing anything relatively difficult and a perfect circle impossible.

What did Helen Keller say when she fell out of a tree? SHFVDHGCIJCBSHG

A man was driving to work when he realized he hadn't told his wife happy anniversary. He turned the car around to head back home only to remember that their anniversary was on Friday, not Thursday. The man shared some nervous laughter with himself as the radio played in the background. He continued on toward work and had a run of the mill day meeting with potential clients.

Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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