What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

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why did the arrow hit the knee? the same reason pigs cant fly.

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Your mom is so fat, she has diabetes.

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Why can't Tommy the T-Rex clap? Because dinosaurs have been extinct for 65 Million years.

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what do you call a black guy in a house? a burglar

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What is worse but similar to Jenga? The September 11th attacks.

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Q: what do polo bears have for lunch A: iceburger

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Why are Chinese people only allowed one child? Because their government states so.

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God is religiously proven to be real

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Last night I had consensual sex with my long term girlfriend in the missionary position. It lasted approximately 4 minutes before I ejaculated into the durex extra safe condom.

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What's the difference between zev hatis and a dwarf Nothing. They are both midgets and are going to die by the age of 25

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Jasper sucks.

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What do yo call SQUIRAL!!!!

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What do you call a jew in a room full of gold? I highly improbable scenario in which the circumstances of how this "man" seemingly got into a gold room are unexplained.

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Whats the differance between peanut butter and jam? You can't peanut butter your dick into a chicks ass.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? Well that would be crude and insensitive to ask a person with dementia to do a task so easily performed by a person who is not non compos mentis.

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Why does LeBron James keep his phone on vibrate? Because he is often in the company of others and he does not want a ringtone to distract others from the current topic of discussion.

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What's the difference between a Mercedes and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Mercedes in my garage.

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hi my name is? joe

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What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

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What do you do when a girl you gave roofies to wakes up? Take your tongue out of her ass and run!

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Q: what do you call a guy with a stolen cat in his pocket A: The police because stealing animals is illegal

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PENIS

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why did the kid go in his room and lock the door. to masturbate

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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