Whats long and hard? a pole

Q: what do you call an icy road? A: dangerous

A bear walks into a bar. There were 4 fatalities and 3 were taken to the hospital.

what do you call a black priest? holy shit!

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar..... Wait..... How?

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

why did the man come out of the closet? because the dark scares him and it smelled like moth balls

A hiker gets lost on a trail and ends up wondering deep into the woods. He comes upon an amish farm. He knocks on the door and an amish man answers. The hiker explains his predicament, and the amish man says "sure you can stay in barn, but promise me one thing, don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course I won't". He then goes to the barn. Right before the hiker falls asleep. The amish farmer comes in and says "make sure you don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course not". So the next morning the hiker is rested, well fed and is about to leave when the amish man approaches and says, "Thank you being decent and christian like."

What's the difference between ignorance and apathy? Most people are ignorant of the global sex slave trafficking industry and apathetic about global hunger.

Why did elmo jump of the cliff caus he wa depresed

Why can't Hank swim? Hank is a rock

what do you call a fish with no gills? I dont know what youd call that creature...but its no fish.

i have 2 penises

A policeman asks a suspect in a murder investigigation about his alibi. The suspect gives him a solid alibi. The suspect go's home to his wife and have dinner.

In Soviet Russia! People were much more finacially secure than they are now.

What's brown, hairy and goes up and down? A kiwifruit in an elevator.

A lady goes into the store to buy potatoes. Then she eats them.

What do you call a man who just died 5 minutes ago? Dead.

Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

What did Sally get for Christmas? Nothing, Sally is dead

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive Cause she's a woman

What does Chuck Norris do when he breaks his legs? he calls a doctor.

What did the man say to hitler? hi hitler.

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...