What's brown and wears glasses? A poo with bad eyesight.

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Why did the old man fart?? Because he had gas

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How do you stop someone from dying of cancer? Shoot them in the head.

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Penis

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how do you wash clothes in the diswasher? you turn it on.

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Two parrots are in a cage. The one looks at the other one and says, "answer the phone," and the other one says, "where are my car keys."

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What do you call someone who can't move their arms or their legs A quadriplegic

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running. From the forest. That hell hole. He had got away, but he could remember. The darkness. The silence. Until the unmistakable scream of the guns and then- The Running. The Screaming. The Blood, oh the blood. Seeing Charlie. Oh, that damned soul Charlie. The bullet went right- But that was long ago. So long. But sometimes, in the silence, Chicken remembers. The Running. The Screaming. The Blood. And he screams.

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What's the difference between ignorance and apathy? Most people are ignorant of the global sex slave trafficking industry and apathetic about global hunger.

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Duncan Traywick is hilarious.

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i am predestal

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whats the difference between santa claus and jewish people santa claus goes down the chimney and jewish people go up

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Hypothetical questions are a waste of time and you are not achieving your full potential by reading this during work.

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Q: Why can't Helen Keller drive? A:Because she is a woman A: She is blind deaf and dumb A: No seriously because she is dead.

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whats red and looks like a bucket a red bucket whats blue and looks like a bucket a red bucket in diguise

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Are you well? No, I'm not a well, I'm a person.

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Q: What's worse then stubbing your toe? A: Coming home from school and your house is burnt down and your whole family is dead.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting attacked by an evil demonic llama.

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does your face hurt? yeah, neither does mine.

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What's harder than nailing seven dead babies to a tree? My erection while doing it.

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johann grayson being liked

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Your Momma's so fat when the whales see her they don't say anything as they are unable to speak the human language.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The undeveloped cerebral cortex vital for comprehending irony left the chicken incapable of finding humor or possibly feeling self-disgust in the acknowledgment that it had just wandered across said road, this being a grandfathered human jest.

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Why do people often give Jimmy strange looks? Because Jimmy has Down Syndrome

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops