Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings

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So I walked upstairs and I told the guy, "No." And he then asks, "Why?"

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A man walked into the white house and security escorted him out because he didn't have a pass.

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Why was the baseball player arrested after stealing a base? Because he pulled out a knife and stabbed the shortstop in the chest.

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Whats the difference between your mother and a mallard with a cold? There are far to many differences between humans and birds to consider for this question. A small list might include wings, feathers, and mating habits to name a few.

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a black guy and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? a taxi driver.

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Chocolate tastes good.

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How do you check that you are not dreaming, but in actual fact, you are wide awake? Try to bite off our finger (this is actually possible, but the brain does not allow you to do it).

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whats slower then a turtle A FATTY

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What do you call a cow with big horns? A bull.

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What's more boring than watch grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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What rhymes with sloth? Cloth

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"What starts with F and ends with a K?" "firetruck?" "no, f u c k"

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its shoulders.

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar, they then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, peace, harmony and understaning between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, essentially they are all the same, and want happy existences with family and friends, and that equality and peace between religions should be a prime focus of religious institutions and governments. They then band together to criticize aetheists, who present a much more probable explanation for why the Universe is the way it is. An eavesdropper then mulls over the idea that the various religions represented behind him are willing to debate philosophical standpoints, so long as their monotheistic beliefs are not contradicted.

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What do you call a monkey? A monkey.

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What do gay horses eat?........ Cheese

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Why doesn't Rick Moranis come out with anymore movies? He left the film industry in 1997, six years after the 1991 loss of his wife, Anne, to liver cancer.

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im jewish

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your worst nightmare!! Ohh.... Do come in it's raining outside.

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A black policeman and a white policeman work different shifts, one is during the day and one is at night and the both get equal pay.

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knock, knock, TRICK OR TREAT

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nathan palmer has a big head !

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Why did sally fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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