Whats the difference between your mother and a mallard with a cold? There are far to many differences between humans and birds to consider for this question. A small list might include wings, feathers, and mating habits to name a few.

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Q: Why cant Helen Keller drive? A: Because shes dead.

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no

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A dog walks into a bar. The bartender asks the dog "what will ya have?" The bartender is then recognized as The Dog Whisperer

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What's the only part of a vegetable that you can't eat??? His wheelchair

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what do you call the one eyed man in the land of the blind? You call him an outcast

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How many jews can you fit in a buick? 6...only if you squeeze 4 in the back.

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What's the best part about Africa? Nothing.

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if life gives u lemons....chuck them back and say u wanted muffins instead!!!!!!!!!!!

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Chocolate rain Awesome!

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what is white and sticky? glue.

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What's the worst thing about being homeless? Not having a home.

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Q: How many babies does it take th paint a barn? A: I dunno, how hard are you throwing them?

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when the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's a black eye.

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The size of Idris Elba's penis

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Knock knock Whos there? D D who D's nuts!

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Lockerbie bombing

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Why did the black man run? There was a mass murderer chasing him with a chainsaw.

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What do a comb and a guitar have in common? Neither of them can climb trees.

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A man was driving to work when he realized he hadn't told his wife happy anniversary. He turned the car around to head back home only to remember that their anniversary was on Friday, not Thursday. The man shared some nervous laughter with himself as the radio played in the background. He continued on toward work and had a run of the mill day meeting with potential clients.

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What did Tommy's father tell him on Christmas? Nothing, he was violently stabbed to death on Christmas Eve.

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Why did the old man fart?? Because he had gas

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What do you call someone who can't move their arms or their legs A quadriplegic

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What's better than winning the Silver Medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops