How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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Why was the monkey on the floor? Because it was dead.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing... she's ugly

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A member of the KKK is walking along the street enjoying the nice weather. He then turns his attention to a black man on the other side of the street and stopped dead in his tracks. He stepped on a land mine.

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If Pythagoras was racist, he would have made hypotenuses.

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Why couldn't the girl charge her phone? The charger wasn't plugged in.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? I was eating an orange in the park last week when I saw four men brutally murdered before my very eyes.

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Why did the black guy get arrested? Homicide.

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A blond, a brunette and a redhead are all trapped on a desert island. They work together and manage to survive until help arrives.

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Whats worse than one pregnancy scare... two pregnancy scares...whats worse than two pregnancy scares? being forced to having consensual sex with a grizzly bear.

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Q: What did the cop say to the deaf man? A: Nothing worth hearing about.

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A man buys free health care...

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What happened to the chicken who crossed the road ? Quite obviously he got to the other side to be greeted by a 50 foot half man half chicken who had one leg.

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Why did the little girl fail her test? She had mental retardation.

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I tried to post an unfunny punch-line-less joke on anti-joke. It worked and I got tons of emotional affirmation from it and stuff, so thanks.

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So I walked upstairs and I told the guy, "No." And he then asks, "Why?"

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Yo mama so poor... that she possesses substantially less money than the average person working hard in order to accumulate money today.

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A man walked into the white house and security escorted him out because he didn't have a pass.

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What do clowns put on bagels? Cream Cheese

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Commie. Commie who? Commie Johnson. We went to high school together.

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Why is one side of a geese formation heading south always longer than the other? It has more geese

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Is your refrigerator running? Because your dad just hung himself

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A man and a woman are in bed together and really want to do something, what is that something? Sleep.

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What do you call a banana that's about to be eaten? A Banana

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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