What did Helen Keller say when she fell out of a tree? SHFVDHGCIJCBSHG

thumb_up thumb_down +26

No.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A van drives into a car. An hour earlier, the man who was driving the van walked into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Slavery

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running. From the forest. That hell hole. He had got away, but he could remember. The darkness. The silence. Until the unmistakable scream of the guns and then- The Running. The Screaming. The Blood, oh the blood. Seeing Charlie. Oh, that damned soul Charlie. The bullet went right- But that was long ago. So long. But sometimes, in the silence, Chicken remembers. The Running. The Screaming. The Blood. And he screams.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What did Sally get for Christmas? Nothing, Sally is dead

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What did I say when I fell of THEEeEeeeeeeee...

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What is 18 inches long and makes a woman scream all night? Crib death.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's brown and wears glasses? A poo with bad eyesight.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Penis

thumb_up thumb_down +22

why did the boy buy a dirty magizine? he should not have, its been on the floor. who wants to read the rolling stone magizine if it has dirt on it. how dumb of him.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the black man sit at the back of the bus? Because all of the seats were taken by other people of different races. Luckily for the man, there was one empty seat at the back which he was able to sit on to make himself comfortable.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's worse than losing your job? Getting brutally sodimized and murdered by a serial rapist.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for his 8th birthday? Prosthetic arms and legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a serial rapist with a violent temper.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

One day, Little Timmy asked his mother this question, "Mommy, why are boys and girls different?" She responded, "You're adopted and Santa Claus is dead."

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Hahahahahhaha...................................black people

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What does a girl with no arms on a swing? Falls.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's the difference between a zombie, a vampire and a werewolf? One is a zombie, one is a vampire and one is a werewolf.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

1 + 1 = 11 Just kidding, it's 2 you moron.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A black man, a Mexican, and a Jew walk into a bar. The white bartender kills them all because he was a huge racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

there where 3 guys at a magic pool. if you jump in and say anything it appears in the pool. the first guy runs, jumps and says money!! he gets a bunch of money. the second guy runs, jumps and says gold!! he gets a bunch of gold. the third guy runs, slips says SHIT!!!! and lands in the pool.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How do you know when a Mexican has died? Well based on the large mass of people inside and outside the funeral home who mostly seem to be of a mexican background and cultue, it would be safe to say that those are his/her friends and family who care deeply about them and therefore you could conclude that a Mexican person probably passed away. It's actually quite sad and going to be a rough few days for those closely connected to the person who died.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A Starfish walks into a bar. He sits down next to a man with a concussion. Q: What did the man say? A: Nothing because he was in a concussion and was no longer able to say words.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops