Why did the blonde girl drink lots of water? Because the fat comments got to her and she changed her diet to nothing but water

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What's worse than catching aids? - already having aids.

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Roses are red, Violets are violet They are not blue You stupid twat

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What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? Jokes related to finding a worm in an apple.

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What's grammatically incorrect about this sentence? Nothing. I lied.

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Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

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what do you get when you have an albino black man, a lesbian middle eastern siamese twin of the female gender, a polygamist indian and a jewish native american? A very cultured and diversified posse of hostages. Take your pick.

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A banker makes some poor economic investments with other people's money. turns out the people can never get the money back. the banker walks away like nothing happened. the government does nothing to prosecute the man. Somewhere in there his wife leaves him.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue.

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So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down, and orders a drink. After giving the pirate a drink, the bartender looks down and notices that there is a steering wheel on the pirate's penis. "Sir, are you aware that there is a steering wheel on your penis?" The bartender asked. "Arrrrrrr, it's driving me crazy!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon," said the bartender, "It looks very uncomfortable and could be dangerous to your health...not to mention your penis is out in the open." "Yes, you are probably right," the pirate agreed. He proceeded to get a ride from a friend to the nearest hospital, for drinking and driving can be dangerous, and steering wheels on penises are not safe.

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What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

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Why did john have to have back surgery He needed his back "screwed" up

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An orange walks into a bar....orange you glad I didn't say banana?!?!

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What happens when an alien goes out in the rain It gets wet

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a man dyslexic into bar walks a

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Ask me if I am a Truck Are You a Truck No

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I went to the opticians to get my eyes checked. The optician said "you need glasses".

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What did Jamaal say when he was in Walmart? I'm Jamaal and I'm in Walmart.

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Why didn't the man get into Harvard? Because he had bad grades

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What's the difference between Colonel Sanders and a barrel of olives? Colonel Sanders isn't in a barrel.

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Vote this down and get DOXED

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A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are about to be executed by a firing squad. Before they shoot the brunette, they ask if she was any last words. “Look, a tornado!” Then they shoot her.

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What's worse than a guy staring at you? Two guys staring at you.

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What is the funniest shirt Emil heskey has ever worn? A shirt that had this joke on it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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