What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

How to shrink China's population in a few minutes? Nuke them all, simple.

What's worst than the finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worst than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worst than finding two worms in your apple? Finding seven dead babies in a trash can. What's worst than that? Finding one dead baby in seven trash cans.

3 men of different races walk into a bar. The bartender then proceeds to ask, "what would you 3 men like?"

One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

My dad weights 350 lbs. He decided to switch to diet soda.

How do you take a picture of a man with a wooden leg? You can't take pictures with wooden legs.

Peas

Why was the man upset? Both sides of his pillow were warm.

Once upon a time there was a young teenager who was bullied a lot. She died 100 years ago.

You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

what is funnier than a apple? a talking apple

Fiona: SHREK! WHERE WERE YOU TONIGHT? Shrek: Out clubbing with the boys. Fiona: What did you do. Shrek: Eat Jews. Borat: iz vedy naaace

Do ya like waffles? Ya we like waffles.

There was a black guy and a blonde crossing the street. They are not related.

Guns don't kill people, books kill trees.

Ask me Whats 2+2. ? Ok what's 2 plus 2 4 you dumb ass

What is easier than making pie? Making cake!

I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

A black and a white man walk into a grocery store the black man buys fried chicken and the white man buys vegtables. The men both have different opions and enjoy different food groups.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being ripped apart by an angry orangatang because orangatangs have the strength of ten men.

What is the difference between Jesus and jackAwhole lota fat

why didn't the baby cry once it came out of the womb? because it was a stillborn.

How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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