how do you tune a piano, you dont, piano tuners tune a piano, I wasn't talking to you!

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Knock Knock Who's There? Poop. Poop who? HAHAHAHAHAHA you said poopoo

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What happens when a man goes to college? He gets a degree and graduates most of the time or he fails miserably.

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What's brown and sticky? "A stick?" No, poo.

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Why did the man visit 4chan? He heard about it from a coworker and was curious about what it was.

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what did the guy say when he lost his sandwich? wheres my sandwich?

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam.

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Why was the prostitute's throat sore? Allergies.

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Why do Jews have such big noses? They don't; To suggest phenotypic variation along religious lines is preposterous.

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A guy went to McDonalds and asked for a cheeseburger: —Can I have a cheeseburguer? —No

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What do you call a bear with no teeth? A Gummy Bear!!

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Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

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Two muffins are in the oven They didn't say anything.

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Where do cows go in their free time? burger king.

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What does an orange and a lemon have in common? They are both orange, exept lemon

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What did the Chicken say to the Interviewer Interviewer: how do you feel about your eggs chicken: the eggs are actually my periods. Interviewer: how do you feel about your periods ChicKen: you eat my periods everyday. people make cakes, omlettes and all these food out of my period. Imagine the world running on your period. Interviewer: what are your feelings on your periods Chicken: I have a mixture of feelings. i feel really scared because the farmers would kill me if i can have my periods. i feel glorified because the world runs on my eggs and i feel proud. I feel freaked out because the world actualy runs on my periods

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whats the stage after cancer? you die

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family

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How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to commit suicide through vehicular manslaughter and knew that the average human being would not be able to stop before it was too late.

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a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

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Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

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What is more difficult than trying to get blood from a stone? Trying to teach it Japanese in the process. [L]

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops