Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

Do you want to hear a joke, Women's rights

What does a homeless man get for Christmas? A gun to kill himself with

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 8, 9, 10

What do you get when you cross isopropil alcohol,ammonia; dish detergent fluid, water, vinegar, and lemon oil? Window Cleaner.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

Why did the blonde turn down prostitution? She knows it is illegal and has better moral values than that.

What does the blond say when she walks out of the salon Nothing, she is hit by a car, and promptly goes into a coma and hasnt said anything since

There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

Why are women bad drivers? -There are no roads in between the bedroom and the kitchen.

give me a gun or i will shoot you i dont know what with but i will kill you so run run or i will come and get you

your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you are just a figment of my imagination.

Shelly tells Rob to go home... Thats what she said

What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

We started this thing together, I do not get it, he is like you said, just a little nerd...

Knock knock... Home invasion

Why? Because.

Q: What's green and has four wheels? A: A green car.

What's more absurd than a goldfish astronaut? A jew that cares about palestinians

What do you do when you see four black people and a Jew? You buy them

so a man walks into a store looking for a new sheet,the cashier he goes to is chinese He leaves with a new sheet and is satisfied with it,oh wait,he gave me a pile of shit,sorry guys i had to -chuckles

What is green and red and flies 100 miles an hour? Super Frog.

a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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