Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The farmer decided it was too cruel to fence in the animal, however getting run over by a car was a fate... not worse than death because it died.

What did the pilot say to the female flight attendant? He told her to never tell his wife about the time they spent in mexico or he'd bludgeon her to death with a hammer.

Q: Whats better than not being a Jew? A: Being a Jew.

A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

Why did the grandma stop baking cookies? Because she is an aging widow suffering from depression because her family seems to forget her existance as she barely lives day by day wilting in her 1 bedroom home.

mary poppins' handbag is full of fuckin dick

What is black and hangs on a rope next to a rebel flag in my back yard? A tire swing for my redneck kids to swing on.

What did modern scientists say to Einstein? Neurtinos travel faster than the speed of light! :)

How many blond girls does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, it is a faily simple task

An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have some pints then leave to do their respective tasks for the day.

THER ONCE WAS A jueny WITH A TEN FOOT WENNY AND HE WENT TO SHOW IT TO THE LADY NEXT DOOR SHE THOUGHT IT WAS A SNKE SO SHE HIT IT WITH A RAKE AND NOW ITS ONLY FIVE FOOT FOUR!

Knock knock Fuck off!

a rabbi and a priest walk into a wall

2 muffins are in a oven for 30 minutes, the baker then questions why he only baked 2 muffins.

Q: How do you stop a black man from drowning? A: Quit peeing in his mouth.

Q: Why is asprin white? A: It works.

What happened to the girl who got an abortion? She got an infection.

What do you call a black man with a knife and red liquid on his hands? A chef who accidently spilled strawberry jam on himself.

Finn: Jake, why can your body do all of those magical things? Jake: What do you mean? Finn: Oh never mind. And they both proceeded to enjoy a delicious breakfast.

Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name ia not Mark.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, The first line is spelled wrong, Ha, I tricked you

This Haiku is strange There is a dinosaur WOW Snuffleupagus

Why was the minority sad? Because the police beat him and then he was raped in jail.

what's the only thing worse than losing a pen before a test? getting raped by a pedifile. -teagan doherty-

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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