don't do anything i wouldn't do first

In soviet Russia...things are different

what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

roses are red, violets are blue, Hitler killed 6.6 million jews.

A man walks into a bar. Splash.

Once upon a time there was a young teenager who was bullied a lot. She died 100 years ago.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No neither has he.

Why can't hank swim? Hank is a rock.

A gay man watches football.

What do you call an Asian who can't drive? Underage, and therefore has not required his license to do so.

A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

3 men of different races walk into a bar. The bartender then proceeds to ask, "what would you 3 men like?"

Why doesnt Squidward wear pants? Because he likes to hang loose

What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

how many flys in a box six --sticksack

How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

Knock knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

Why did the African boy die? He was denied any antibiotics to heal his severe case of mono and AIDS, and was living on dirty water and dirt.

Why did the boy throw his alarm clock out of the window? Because he was angry at the alarm going off

When does Adolf Hitler get horny? When his hormones start at it when looking at women.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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