What do you call a black and white ruler? Barack Obama.

How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? Suck its dick.

What has four legs and rocks? Your baby kitten that just got stoned to death.

What do you call a person without any arm no legs and a eye patch? names

why cant the blind man read brail? he has no fingers

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall?? A: It depends on how hard you throw them!!

What did the (real) wrestler say to the U.F.C guy? Probably something nice because most U.F.C fighters were wrestlers.

Q:What did the frog say to the mailman? A:Nothing theres no mail on Sunday's.

Wenn Sie dies zu übersetzen, dann ist dein ein Esel

Who swept the woman off her feet? A kidnapper

How do you make a twelve year old girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear.

what do u call a newspaper boy on brake? your uncle because hes broke and struggling with income.

Want to hear a joke? So do I.

whats a joke

Whats the difference between a baby and a bowling ball? I dont have a bowling ball stapled to my tree

What happened to the fish? It drowned

Actually it was me Josh brown

What did the ocean say the other ocean? Nothing, bodies of water are incapable of speech.

Why did the white girl become a lesbian? Because she was raped and had no more trust in the male gender.

What is a baby chick after 9 days old? 10 days old.

What do you get when a fat kid eats a donut... A Heart Attack.

roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because his face was stapled to the wall.

There are 2 muffins sitting in an oven. One muffin says "Damn, it's getting hot in here." The other muffing replies "Holy Shit! A Talking Muffin!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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