What do you call a dear with no eyes? A no-idear

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Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

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*Walk Into The Bakery* "Excuse me, sir. How much does the challah cost (holocaust)?

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What's worse than celery stuck between your teeth? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

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A guy forgot his 20th wedding anniversary. His wife was really mad, and said that she better have something in the driveway that goes from 0 to 350 in 10 seconds, and he quickly pulled out an AK-47 and murdered her violently.

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Why was the man foolish for buying a new lamp? Because he lived in a small shack with no electricity and was probably going to die soon.

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What did the boy with no mom get for Christmas? He was beaten by his drunken and abusive father.

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i hate it when people repeat the same jokes. i just hate it when people repeat the same jokes.

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Why didn't the man go to the movies?? Because he likes pie.

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What's black and white and red all over? A penuin that got bit by a sea lion.

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A man walks into a bar, he then proceeds to purchase his favorite alcoholic beverage.

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What did little boy with no arms and no legs get for chrismas: a bike

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a

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A kid comes across an injured duck near a lake. Nevermind he doesn't see it he's really high.

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What's green, has six legs and lives in the jungle? A Snooker Table.

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Knock knock! Just kidding.

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What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of babies? One's used for bowling and the other's just sad.

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A terrorist robs a walrus.

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Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, It's none of my business.

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If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Andy. You're late, I've been piss-arsing about waiting for you to get here.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

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Sally has no arms. A: Knock kock? B: Whose there? Not Sally.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops