So a Jew is walking on the street and he sees a penny, and he decides to pick it up because ever since the fire that killed his family and burned his house down he has been living on the street and he needs all the help he can get.

What do you call a german soldier? A Nazi

A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

If little jimmy has five candy bars and he eats three, what does little jimmy have? Diabetes

What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

What is the difference between a peasant and a pheasant? One's a bird.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from KFC.

Roses are red,violets are blue,hit me once I will break you to Roses are red,violets are blue,I will kick your ass, as hard as to

What do the Africans have for breakfast? Nothing.

Jacob Mckeand licks his gooch everynight. Some nights he even covers it in maple syrup. 'mmmmm' he thinks to himself as he licks his 7 inch gooch up and down.

A black guy and a Mexican are sitting in a car who's driving??? The Cops

Why did the ANTI-JOKE book cry? -It wasn't funny

Me: "If I had Alzheimers, I would break down into tears." Friend: "Why, you would forget why you were crying..." Me: "Who are you again?"

The boy said to the priest, may God be with you. The priest responded with, "And also IN you".

When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

a man was cooking a tortilla. what did he say when he dropped it while flipping the tortilla? oops i dropped my tortilla

How do you kill a blonde? You stab her many times in the ear with a fork......Then finsih her off with a spoon. No knives those hurts

Roses are yellow, Violets are purple, im not color blind you just cant read.

How did Bella fly? Very badly.

Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero? Because it is impossible, the answer is undefined.

Whats more dangerous then a man with a gun? two men with guns.

What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide.

What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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