what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

What do you get when you cross a lion and a tiger? A Ligor.

roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

Knock knock. Who's there? The bailiffs, we have come to take your house

what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Reading re-posts of classic anti jokes posted by lonely teenagers.

What do you call a black man with a guitar? His name

Officer i'm dot nrunk, beriously you gotta selieve me!

Why did the water in the lake disappear? There was a toilet at the bottom.

Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

Roses are red , Violets are blue You little dumb ass bitch Ain't fuckin' with yoouuuuuu

What do Barney and a butchers knife have in common? One of them is purple

The boy said to the priest, may God be with you. The priest responded with, "And also IN you".

An Aussie, American and Englishman were all drinking beer on a plane to Hawaii. All 3 of them were very excited for their vaction, which they all saved hard for and their breaks from work were well deserved.

Life is confusing. Really how so? He just walked up to me five minutes ago with a pair of socks taped on both sides of his face saying humanity is screwed and ran off after peeing on my carpet.

Q:Why was 6 afraid of seven? A:Because seven ate (eight) nine

What's worse than a crying baby on a trans-Atlantic flight? A hungry lion on a trans-Atlantic flight.

Why wasn't the elephant allowed to the pajama party? Because he didnt have any pajamas.

a man was cooking a tortilla. what did he say when he dropped it while flipping the tortilla? oops i dropped my tortilla

I found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school. I said, "Wow, I can't believe I just found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school." Later that day, my principal gassed the kindergarten classrooms with cyanide while shouting, "GO RAIDERS!"

What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

Why did Jimmy not go to school? Because Jimmy, along with his family, were killed in a horrible house fire. Knock Knock? Who's there? Not Jimmy...

Roses are red,violets are blue,hit me once I will break you to Roses are red,violets are blue,I will kick your ass, as hard as to

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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