Q: what's worse then stubing yout toe? A: getting raped by godzilla

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

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The blonde is in the park withb a rope a man passes and says what are u doing, she says im goin o hang and kill myself. the next day the man comes back and sees the blonde there alive he says i thought u were goin hang yourself she says i tried but i couldnt breathe.

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what would u do if you were having anal sex with a black guy and his penis was sooooo big that it ripped ur asshole? staple it back together

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old spice body spay is so powerfull it can block BO for 16 hours. its so powerfull it can turn of the sun, but then it gets to cold, so it makes another sun........DOUBLE SUN POWWWWWEEEERRRRRRR!!!

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Why did the black man across the road? just kidding he didnt make it across the road i hit him with my car

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why did the man go to prison? he was a serial rapist.

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What is the worst gift a child can get? a gift

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A man walks into a bar........ gets eaten by a lion.

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A black man was walking down the street wearing a ski mask. It was cold outside.

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Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

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A man walks into a bar with a frown on his face His dog just died

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because grass don't eat meat.

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What's the difference between an orange and a banana? they're spelled differently

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What did one butthole say to the other butthole? I'm actually not sure. I wasn't there when he said it.

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Two Mice are sitting on a bridge , one falls down an the other is named Charlotte

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What did the five fingers say to the face? Nothing. Fingers cannot talk.

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Why did the woman not wear a bra? Because she had breast cancer and got a double mastectomy.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferarri? I don't have a ferarri in my garage.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Your one and only! Step away from the door, Francheska. You're violating the restraining order.

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While getting Sherrie's Crabcakes I was arrested by Missy Hepp highway patrol.

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Why a polar bear fell over? He drank so much

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

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A burglar broke into a house one night. He picked up a CD player to place in his sack and a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark, saying, "Jesus is watching you." He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, he shook his head, clicked the light on, and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, he heard, "Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?" he hissed at the parrot "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you." The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?" "Moses," replied the bird. "Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?" "Devout Semites," the parrot replied.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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