Why did the man eat his cellphone? Because he has a serious mental disability, and did not know that it was not a normal thing to do, and for anybody to laugh at him for doing something like this is just a sick person.

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What do you call an unconscious black man? An ambulance.

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Whats scary about the asian man driving a car? He was blind

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Your Mama is so old, that she is probrably going to die pretty soon.

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Why was the blonde confused? Because someone was dressed in a chicken costume throwing pinecones at her.

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Roses are blue, Violets are purple, I like chicken. Do you like chicken?

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Yo momma so hairy she needs to shave herself.

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A man has a parrot who repeats everything the man says. He constantly complains about his mother-in-law and everytime he says her name it follows with the word bitch. One day she makes a suprise visit and he greets her with a "Oh hello Doris" , he looks in horror to see if the parrot will call her a bitch but instead finds the parrot dead because he forgot to feed it for 4 days.

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What did John's girlfriend get him for their 5 year anniversary? Proactive because his acne bothers her.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree, because it was dead. why did the second monkey fall out of the tree, becuase it was dead. why did the third monkey fall out of the tree, because he thought it was a game!

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to get some exercise. They were getting terribly overweight.

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What does shit smell like? Your maaaa

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What do you call John Lennon without glasses? A skeleton, because John Lennon is dead.

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whay did the monkey fall out of the tree? he was dead. why did the cat fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey.

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What does a black guy get for Christmas? Everything you own

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A man from timbuktu slept on a bed of nails. It was very uncomforable

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm colorblind.

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What happened to the fish? It drowned

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Roses are Blue Violets are red, I need to go the the bathroom

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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I started a pottery course where the two instructors looked like Demi Moore and Patrick Swayze. The only other student looked like Whooping Goldberg. This teacher to student ratio proved invaluable as I am hoping to make a living as an artist and really appreciated all the extra attention.

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What is more black than a Nigerian marathon runner? The night sky

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Why did the girl drop her ice cream? Because seeing as a bus was heading straight toward her, she quickly decided to sacrifice her frozen treat and dodge the oncoming vehicle in order to save her life.

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Actually it was me Josh brown

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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