was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

Jacob Mckeand licks his gooch everynight. Some nights he even covers it in maple syrup. 'mmmmm' he thinks to himself as he licks his 7 inch gooch up and down.

Two muffins are in an oven. They say absolutely nothing because they're muffins and not sentient.

What did the dog say to the rabbit? I quite liked Prince's first album.

jasper walks into a bar, he sees an elephant and can't believe his eyes. he says "HORGWARSH!"

Gerald: Hey did you know I was named AFTER Abraham Lincoln? Gloria: Because he was born in the 1800's and you were born and named many years afterward? Gerald: Ah... I guess I emphasized that joke a little to much - I'm sorry this conversation happened

An alcoholic walks into a bar.... I forgot the rest of the joke but your mother is a prostitute.

What happened to the black man when he was hit by a truck? He died.

What's worse than sex with a midget? Non-consensual sex with a midget.

My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

What happened when barba opened the coca cola? The cap flew off and hit the fence then the train then the moon then the pillow then the sun then the pole and the pole fell and hit the baseball and the cap landed on the floor... Then my turtle died

whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

Q:why did the guy go to the doctor? A:I dunno, he must have gone for a good reason

why did the baby fall down the steps? Because there was big earth quake that blocked his parents on the other side of the house, therefor leaving no one capable of getting to him befor falling

A clown walks into a bar and orders a pie. After about 2 minutes, the bartender gives him a pie. Later, a blonde walks into a bar and orders a cake. After about 1 minute, the bartender gives her a cake. Then a dog walks into a bar. It doesn't order anything because it's a dog.

Why couldn't the kid eat his vegetables? His parents stabbed him...

What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

Knock! Knock! Who's there? Russel. Russell who? Russell Johnson. Oh, come in.

You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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