What do you do when a girl you gave roofies to wakes up? Take your tongue out of her ass and run!

To pen state administraters walk into a butt

Why did Little Jimmy never make it in the NBA? Because he died at age 6.

Don't you hate it when you're reading a sentence and it doesn't end how you testicles. _._._

I can't think of a joke!

If you look up stupid in the dictionary the definition would say stu·pid? ?[stoo-pid, styoo?] -er, -est, noun adjective 1. lacking ordinary quickness and keenness of mind; dull. 2. characterized by or proceeding from mental dullness; foolish; senseless: a stupid question. 3. tediously dull, especially due to lack of meaning or sense; inane; pointless: a stupid party. 4. annoying or irritating; troublesome: Turn off that stupid radio. 5. in a state of stupor; stupefied: stupid from fatigue.

Knock Knock. F uck off.

Q: What is Paul's nickname A: His name is Paul, he doesn't need a nickname

What did a cat said to another cat? Nothing because cats dont talk.

What did the chicken do before it crossed the road? Looked both ways and then crossed with caution while looking out for oncoming vehicles.

why did the football coach go to the bank? to make a deposit into his account

What did one Rhino say to the other? My, I'm sure glad we found this decadent watering-hole.

A blonde girl walks into a screen door. She is blind.

What do you call a pig standing on its back legs? Yo mama

why did Suzy drop her ice cream? doesn't matter, why is she out of the kitchen.

Yo' mama's so fat, she has difficulty finding clothes that fit

I met a man today. His name was John.

Roses are red Violets are blue I need some money.

A girl walks into a bar. She's a lesbian.

Roses are red. So is bacon, Poetry is hard . bacon.

why did the man have solar panels on his house? because he had some money left over cos he won the lottery

Two small boys are walking in a schoolyard. One of the boys sits down under a tree looking distraught. The other asks him "Well whats the matter Eddy?" "Every time I walk to my bus-stop in the morning, Jimmy Krugan, pushes me down and takes my money. " The first boy thinks for sec.. "Well here's what you do Ed; go to your Dad's shed and grab a 2X4, paint it bright blue. In the morning, walk to school with it under your jacket and when Jimmy starts in on you give him a good wallop. He wont be bothering you anymore." The following day the boys are in the yard again. Eddy is seen under the tree seeming just as distraught. Confused, the boy asks him.. "Well Ed, did you do what I told you?" "No."

Daddy daddy daddy. What. Will you buy me a porn for my birthday. What! I want porn daddy. Shut up gosh your a 8 year old girl

A englishmen an irishmen and a ginger walk off a bridge gingers have no souls

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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