Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

Knock Knock Who's there? Hodor

A pregnant woman takes the bus, once inside she realizes that there are no seats. No one was pollite enough to let her sit down so she felt pretty uncomfortable on the way home.

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar, and have a stimulating discussion about economics

If Vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat? Probably both plant life, sea-based creatures, and land-based animals. However, depending on the personal preference of the person, they can also be a vegetarian or not. They could also be cannibals, but the literal definition of humanitarian would go against any cannibalistic traditions due to the fact that humanitarians help others for the benefit of humanity as a whole, eating people would go against such beliefs.

"What starts with F and ends with a K?" "firetruck?" "no, f u c k"

A man walks into a store, and says to the cashier: "I'd like to buy 6 fridges". The cashier says: "Why do you need that many fridges?" The man says: "I'm an antelope!"

What do you call a monkey? A monkey.

How many jews can you fit in a buick? 6...only if you squeeze 4 in the back.

you know what sucks more than getting raped by a gorilla? getting raped by two gorillas.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind.

Whats big, hairy, and super long? My big toe you pervert.

I man walks into a bar. He got drunk.

why are elephants gray? to tell them apart from blueberries.

Why did the chicken cross the road To go to KFC

Why do redheads have red hair Because they were born like that.

Herman Cain

What do you call a racist guy surrounded by a gang of black pepole? Dead.

What do a comb and a guitar have in common? Neither of them can climb trees.

What did the guy who speaks in tongue say to the other guy who speaks in tongue? Gibberish

What's worse than being a replacement? An insufficient replacement.

If a midget is mentally retarded and always late for work, is it okay to call him a little tardy?

A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released at a nearby park.

Why did the White guy wanna be Black? He liked basketball.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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