Q: What do you call a gray box without a joke in it? A: I don't know but you'd better think of something.

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Your mom is so stupid that... She often makes mistakes.

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Q: Why was the man hit by the train? A: He was tied to the rail road tracks...

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which of the following is right -the yoke is white -the yoke are white neither the yoke is yellow

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The new pickup line. The human body has 206 bones in it. I have broken one of them, please take me to a hospital.

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Why are Chinese people only allowed one child? Because their government states so.

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What's the difference between medicine and astronomy ? They're different fields of studies.

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what did the ninja say to the watermelon ? nothing

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Jerry Rice is walking down the streets of San Francisco when all of a sudden he hears sirens coming from the next street down. He hurries down the road to see what's happening and sees a huge fire engulfing a 10 story building. And on the top floor, a lady is leaning out the window shouting to the firemen below. FIREMAN: Come on, lady, jump. We have the tarp here, we'll be able to catch you. LADY: No....I can't. My baby, my baby is up here. FIREMAN: Throw the baby down, we'll catch him. LADY: No, you'll miss. I can't leave my baby. Jerry sees this and steps forward. "Hey, I think I can help. Let me have the bullhorn." JERRY: Hey lady, I'm Jerry Rice, the wide receiver for the San Francisco 49er's. I'm the best wide receiver in the game, throw your baby down and I'll catch him, this is what I do for a living. Being a 49er fan herself, the lady recognizes Jerry and throws her baby down to him. Just as she throws it though, a huge gust of wind comes and takes the baby and starts to blow him off course. Jerry sees this and takes off after the baby. He hurdles the line closing off the area, fights through the crowd, dodges a couple of fire fighters, jumps over the car, and dives forward, just making a fingertip catch of the baby. The crowd around him goes wild and starts cheering his amazing catch. So Jerry jumps to his feet, raises his finger into the air, does a two step and then spikes the baby. If you have any dead baby jokes that are not here, I want to hear from you. Email me your dead baby jokes at skitzopathik@hotmail.com and I'll add them to this page.

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here i am sitting here staring at the wall and beside me is a doll, oh no its moving, i hope it doesnt lick tht popsicle, oh no it just licked tht popsicle, oh no oh no

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he felt like it.

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Q: what do you call a guy with a stolen cat in his pocket A: The police because stealing animals is illegal

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My dad beats my mom At checkers

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An Irishman stays home

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This joke isnt funny.

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What do you call a bunch of black people in a red car.... A jaffa

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Two peanuts were walking down the street and one was asalted

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What do homeless people get for Christmas? Nothing, they are homeless.

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What's the difference between people with aids and people with cancer? People with cancer can get into heaven

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CHEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

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How did two Jews react when they saw a quarter on the sidewalk? They agreed to donate it to charity.

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what did one bum way to the other? we're shit out of luck

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What happens if you're in the middle of counting towels? You finish counting your towels.

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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