What do you call a mexican sleeping in a car tired.

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Are you well? No, I'm not a well, I'm a person.

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If I have $5 and Chuck Norris has $5, we both have the same monetary value.

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Today I had sex with a married man, but thats OK he's my husband

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

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An Arian man walks into a German-owned bar and asks to use the restroom. The bartender sees this acceptable and allows it. Soon after, a Jewish man asks the same question, but this time the bartender said no. The Jewish man thought it was an outrage and demanded why, so the bartender calmly explained to him that the Arian man was still using the restroom and that when he was finished the Jewish man was free to poo as he pleased.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, he didn't my car got to him first.

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Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red Fences are red OMG MY FENCE IS ON FIRE!

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What's worse then having Casey Anthony babysit your child? A girl asking, "Is it in?"

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Why do people often give Jimmy strange looks? Because Jimmy has Down Syndrome

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why did the arrow hit the knee? the same reason pigs cant fly.

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why did the boy drop her ice cream? -he got hit by a bus

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whats straight as a fudge packer kyle grund

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Why can't Tommy the T-Rex clap? Because dinosaurs have been extinct for 65 Million years.

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A catholic priest invited one of Sunday school students to his house one night. They watched a movie and the boy was home before his bedtime.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs wearing lead weights in a pool? Screwed.

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cheese

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Why did the priest renew his...SHIT, A BEAR!!

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Why is Chuck Norris' beard so great? because he grooms it daily.

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What do a Shark and a lemon have in common? They can both swim, except for the lemon

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What did michael J. Fox say when someone asked him to play catch? "sorry, I'm busy".

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How much does a polar bear weigh? About 1,150 pounds.

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Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

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whats green white black red and can fly? nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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