Why was the little boy's head so big? He had a tumor in his brain.

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How do u save someone from dieing of cancer? U shoot them in the head

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A girl walks into a bar. She's a lesbian.

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What's the difference between a porsche and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a porsche in my garage.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? I was eating an orange in the park last week when I saw four men brutally murdered before my very eyes.

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Whats black and white and red all over? An interracial aborted fetus

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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once there was a man named steve. he happily sniffs pot every day after work. especially on sundays. one day, his family finds him sniffing pot. they are disgusted and disappointed in his bad decisions. so they join him

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One kid clicks his pen. The kid sitting next to home clicks his pen. They next 3 kids click their pens. The teacher walks by and says "monkey see monkey do." And the kid that first clicked his pen responded and says "monkey pees all over you."

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra but like he actually did not a bar a womens breats.

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Q. why didnt the boy get a christmas present from his dear grandmother? A. because she died on thanksgiving

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Your momma's of a reasonable figure and weight.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was A bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy went through chemo. Fuzzy Wuzzy wasn't very fuzzy was he?

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Yo mama so poor... that she possesses substantially less money than the average person working hard in order to accumulate money today.

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Q: Why don't blind people skydive? A:Because it is scary

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of the ocean? Dead.

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what is the worst thing in the galaxy? runing out of dr.pepper :(

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar, they then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, peace, harmony and understaning between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, essentially they are all the same, and want happy existences with family and friends, and that equality and peace between religions should be a prime focus of religious institutions and governments. They then band together to criticize aetheists, who present a much more probable explanation for why the Universe is the way it is. An eavesdropper then mulls over the idea that the various religions represented behind him are willing to debate philosophical standpoints, so long as their monotheistic beliefs are not contradicted.

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why did the blond cross the road? she doesnt know either

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

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you know what sucks more than getting raped by a gorilla? getting raped by two gorillas.

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So what happened after 911?? What do you think?

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What did the giraffe say to the monkey? Nothing

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That's what he said.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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