why did the man die? he got shot

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What's similar about a black person and an apple? Nothing, an apple is a fruit. It has nothing to do with hanging from trees.

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What did the chicken do before it crossed the road? Looked both ways and then crossed with caution while looking out for oncoming vehicles.

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Why did a hipster walks into a health food store? To buy some healthy food.

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What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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whats bigger than a 4 school bus pile up? genocide.

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How many Somalians can you fit in a Shopping trolley? Well rather unfortunately there is a lack of Shopping Centers in Somalia due to its corrupt government and its general poverty in comparison to a 1st world country, needless to mention the civil wars. I would guess 7 though.

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What do you call an anti joke website? http://anti-joke.com

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If Pythagoras was racist, he would have made hypotenuses.

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Why Did the throw up He was sick

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An Irishman walks into a bar and orders a Coke.

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Why did lady gaga set her alarm? So she could get up in the morning.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? One is food the other, fuel.

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once there was a man named steve. he happily sniffs pot every day after work. especially on sundays. one day, his family finds him sniffing pot. they are disgusted and disappointed in his bad decisions. so they join him

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What's the problem with blonde people? They don't have black hair.

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Rob Bell

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How do you make a baby cry? You hit it in the face with a hammer.

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A englishmen an irishmen and a ginger walk off a bridge gingers have no souls

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Two girls were sitting quietly. Badum tss

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if you are what you eat then arent pornstars considered vaginas?

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Two black people passed me in an alley at night...... They said hi

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What do black men do in the South? Hang around

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Humpty dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty dumpty had a big fall. All the king's horses and all the king's men did not come to help him because the United States does not have a patriarchal system of government.

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If Vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat? Probably both plant life, sea-based creatures, and land-based animals. However, depending on the personal preference of the person, they can also be a vegetarian or not. They could also be cannibals, but the literal definition of humanitarian would go against any cannibalistic traditions due to the fact that humanitarians help others for the benefit of humanity as a whole, eating people would go against such beliefs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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