What's harder than nailing seven dead babies to a tree? My erection while doing it.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the man say when he dropped an apple on his foot? That might have caused some minor discomfort had I not been wearing shoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the boy say after he hit his head? I just hit my head.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why'd the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Whose there? A chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: How many dead people does it take to change a light bulb? A: Trick question...i have sex with them in the dark

thumb_up thumb_down +15

roses are red violets are black why is your chest as flat as my back

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's the difference between zev hatis and a dwarf Nothing. They are both midgets and are going to die by the age of 25

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Your mom is so fat she should be concerned about her increased risk of heart failure.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you tell if your sister is on her period? Cause your dads dick tastes funny...

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How much does a Mexican Parade cost? A Nickel

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How can you tell if a duck is watching you? Look at its eyes

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do yo call SQUIRAL!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Jasper sucks.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Whats the differance between peanut butter and jam? You can't peanut butter your dick into a chicks ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's better than finding a worm in your apple? -The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's the difference between a Mercedes and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Mercedes in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What happens if you're in the middle of counting towels? You finish counting your towels.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

The chicken crossed the road.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What smells worse than an old women's fart? the rotting carcus of a dead baby

thumb_up thumb_down +3

hi my name is? joe

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did Little Jimmy never make it in the NBA? Because he died at age 6.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Fish for a man, he has food for tonight. Teach a man how to fish and he will have one more skill under his belt.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops