What has 2 legs and smells like fish A fish with 2 legs

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I think everybody should have a penis. Does that make me a bad feminist?

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Q: Whats worse then a minor fender bender? A: Dieing a long painful death by getting stabbed 27 times then getting hit by a car 2 hours later your brother finds you and told you that him and your wife have been cheating on you and your kid is his.

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whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

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whats the difference between marmalade and jam? you cant marmalade ur cock up a girls arse

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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Your mother is so retarded. How retarded is she? Very retarded.

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NeroChan, I have said nothing to you, that you have not taught me, if nothing else you have indirectly inspired yourself, you will get back on your feet, you just need to take one step at the time, I know how ambitious you are, but you always focused on helping others, hiding, seeing yourself as a sinking ship, trying to help as many as possible before you pass away. We can work trough this together, it is easy to figure out that you are trying to protect others from what you feel that you have become, something that cannot be repaired, something that was never meant to be fixed, but to be used until it had no more to give.

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2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow

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What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

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Whats red and looks like a bucket? -a red bucket Whats blue and looks like a bucket? -a red bucket disguised as a blue bucket

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? when people don't understand the concept of anti-jokes and post real jokes

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"Knock Knock" "Just ring the bloody bell for once!"

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Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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How do you confuse an English Professor? Light your pants on fire and flop around like a fish.

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Lil Wayne

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What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

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How tall is a tree? Taller than the ground

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a school bus? A dog and a school bus are not sexually compatible and therefore they cannot reproduce.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, the little midget is coming for you. If you don't run and if you don't hide, you will probably be stepped on because of my incredible big size.

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What did the prosecuting attorney say to the defense attorney? I hate you.

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Knock, knock who's there? Not your Dad, because he left and created a better family.

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knock knock whos there **gunshot ...man that gun show next door is annoying

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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