Twitter: @TotalJokes: "So it's been 11 years since the planes hit the world trade centre, time really does fly by."

What is worse than ten babies in the street, eleven babies in the street.

Your momma is so fat, she has her own gravitational pull.

You're such a retard, you have to take special education, live with a mother that doesn't know what to do with you, not understand the real world, and have people look at you strangely for the rest of your life.

Well, its allright then, just tired that is all, leave it be, I mean what if your wife sees it? What will she think?

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side... (other side as in the afterlife, for it committed suicide by crossing the road)

What's an AntiJoke? A joke that has no comical value.

srrsly, the fuk is going down here? read down It`s satanist rituals or something, Are there mmodderators that will remove this things seriusly!Moral stuf is satanism!!!!

What is the difference between a refrigerator? Seven anchors because blue isn't vital for turtles to fornicate.

How do you tell a clown his fly is open? Say sir your fly is open. Then beat him with a pipe until you cant tell what used to be his face.

roses are blue violets are red and just like you they're messed up in the head

What did the fireman say to the people in the burning house I'm going to use this water for my sprinkler rather than saving your lives. I might as well use this for something more significan, like my lawn.

Why was Jesus Christ white? Because it would be a lot better if I had more confidence in myself...

How do you confuse a Mexican? Stand in the middle of a crosswalk while shouting "Cthulu will rise!" whilst looking at the sky and playing "Everybody Have Fun Tonight" by Wang Chung. Works every time.

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

Why did the guy fall asleep? Because he's in a coma.

What's the difference between a ball and a bouncy ball? A bouncy ball is bouncy.

I have a really good knock knock joke. You start. Knock knock. Open the door see who it is and then slam the door in your face THE END

Two men enter a room. Two men and a baby leave the room...

your mommas so fat she jumped for joy and got stuck

Q:Why did the kid drop his ice cream A:He was hit by a car

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

what do hookers and bungee jumping have in common? They are both 100$ to be in/on and if the rubber breaks your screwed

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an orange and finding a worm.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...