Q: What's the difference between a Boyscout and a Jew? A: Boyscouts come home from camp.

What's worse than putting stones in a blender? Putting a baby in a blender.

Why? Because.

What is Cleopatra's favorite cookie? A: Chips Ahoy

Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

A duck walks into a bar and orders 2 beers and a shot. The bartender says "That'll be four fifty." The duck says he doesn't have any money and asks if the bartender can put it on his bill. The bartender says "No." He then picked the duck up by the neck and raped him mercilessly. "That's what he gets" one patron said. "Yeah, he was asking for it"

Sally bought a shakeweight. She is an alcoholic and is ruining her family.

Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have STD's, Now so do you!

what is your moms favorite website? Wait did I say mom. Oh I'm not very sorry.

What do you call a flat-chested woman with a penis? A man.

What's more absurd than a goldfish astronaut? A jew that cares about palestinians

Q: A man walked into a bar and said, "Ouch!" Why? A: The man walked into a METAL bar.

Knock knock! Who's there? Joe Barkley. Joe Barkley who? ...

There's this traveling merchant from Flint, MI. He goes door to door trying to sell shampoo. He is having a lot of trouble selling shampoo in Flint because they were hit hard during the recession and now ahve trouble affording even the most seemingly cheap products.

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Love and attention from his parents.

so a man walks into a store looking for a new sheet,the cashier he goes to is chinese He leaves with a new sheet and is satisfied with it,oh wait,he gave me a pile of shit,sorry guys i had to -chuckles

What's worse than being raped? Finding out it was your uncle.

What do you call a black man on the moon An astronaut

What is worse than torturing, "forcibly penetrate" and then slowly and painfully kill nine billion people? The Holocaust?

Why did the kid poop his pants? He was a baby

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

Der Ter-Rerks, nern ter serrentersts ers "Terernerserers Rerks", wers er dernerser dert lerved ern der Certersers perrerd. Ert wers er mert erter, prering ern smerler, plernt-erterng dernersers serch ers herdrersers ernd serrerperds. Ert erser hernterd der herned herberver Tersererterps, werd erverderns erf ferts ferned ern der ferserlersed rermerns.

my parents let me say words that start with sh and end in it. shit what else could it be

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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