A man says to a boy. I bet you I can jump over that mountain. The boy wins the bet because it is a physical impossibility to jump over a mountain.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A waste of time because they just be playing soccer

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What is Wonder Woman's drug of choice? Heroine.

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What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

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Why couldn't the blonde have kids? She had Ovarian Cancer.

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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How many dead babies can you fit a bathtub??? It depends on how you slice them!

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what do you call a man with no arms or legs jetskiiing? I don't know but it seems a highly improbably situation.

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Shes got a big booty so I call her by her first name, women deserve respect.

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why did the other chicken cross the road peer pressure

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Why was the woman on video chat? She was videochatting with her husband, he was out of town.

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whats black & white the colombo school shooting citv footage

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How do you get a baby to stop crying Cut its head off

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What do 10 dead babies in a blender sound like? Idk because I was too busy masturbating.

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what did the white car look like... a black car but the color is different

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Did you know that you can drink lava? You can only do it once though.

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School is like a boner. It is long and hard unless your asian.

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But I don't use all those things myself Nero, I do however teach people how to use it.

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Why do bees fly? Because evolution made them

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A man said to another man," you are so stupid you climbed a glass wall to see what was on the other side." The second man said," well you were on this side of the wall and I'm going to kick your ass." The second man had been drinking that night.

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A burglar broke into a house one night. He picked up a CD player to place in his sack and a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark, saying, "Jesus is watching you." He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, he shook his head, clicked the light on, and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, he heard, "Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?" he hissed at the parrot "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you." The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?" "Moses," replied the bird. "Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?" "Devout Semites," the parrot replied.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the mountains? A: Bear food.

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what's the difference between a jew and a bar of soap? You don't rub your nuts with a jew.

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Q: Whats red and not a penis A: A lot of things

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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