A man walks into a bar a bartender says, 'why the long face'? the man says 'I just walked into a bar'!!!

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How did the baby survive the car accident? He didn't. He was killed on impact.

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What did the caterpillar say to the robot? Nothing. Caterpillars do not have vocal chords and there are not, as yet, any truly portable robots capable of comprehending speech so to speak to one would be pointless.

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Q: What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: The pizza does not scream in the oven.

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What is worse than an 11 year old getting raped You getting caught

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What do you call a guy sleeping with little boys? Michael Jackson

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. wow i missed the entire purpose of this.

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Whats included in over 90% of all car crashes? A Car

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What did one cannibal say to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

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You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

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How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

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Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

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Hamsters are a lot like cigarettes. They're completely harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.

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Why do midgets laugh when they run? The grass tickles their balls.

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Ernie: "Hey Jim, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Jim then breaks down and cries deeply at Ernie's question as the fact that he was born without a tongue continues to slowly tear him apart.

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What's worse than dropping a dollar down the drain? Getting a needle shoved up your penis and it scrapes the insides of your balls open so that all of the sperm pours out of your balls and you are screaming in agony and you can never have children in the future.

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what do you call a shitty anti-joke? A shitty anti-joke.

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So a man walks into a bar. Unfortunately, he had brittle bone disease, cracked open his skull and bled to death on the pavement.

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A tall German man and a short Ukrainian woman walk into a pub and sit down for a drink. The German, not wanting to seem rude, asks the Ukrainian how her day has been. The Ukrainian smiles confusedly as she doesn't understand German.

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"bluar blah blah blarRR/ the stupid pointless part" dead people/ animals/ objects can't talk/ drive/ operate compueter, lol I'm so focken funni

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Whats big and blue and white and if it falls from a tree its sure to kill you. A fridge with a denim jacket on.

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what does lady gaga have that some people dont have? a penis.

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What do elves get for Christmas? Overtime.

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A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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