Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

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how many dicks can you fit into mia khalifa's ass

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What's the difference between an orange? A bicycle because a vest doesn't have any sleeves.

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"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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What starts with f and ends in u-c-k? a:****

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Nero7 How are you doing? This is "Eliza" I hope I will be joining, but I cannot reach you by phone, please respond ASAP time is running out.

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Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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Who threw beer on livvy barnett? Cam irwin.

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Fiona: SHREK! WHERE WERE YOU TONIGHT? Shrek: Out clubbing with the boys. Fiona: What did you do. Shrek: Eat Jews. Borat: iz vedy naaace

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(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

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What looks like mud, smells like mud and eats mud? An African

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Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

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Your mother is so obese that she has over the recommended daily calorie intake on a regular basis.

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Why is a bird when it flies? Because the higher it goes the much.

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Miss Jones has 10 apples on her desk. Billy takes half of them away and runs. What does Miss Jones have? 5 apples and a complaint filed for smacking Billy with a ruler.

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Hello. my name is Rhys. and i'm the only person who liked this post.

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wow i bet grass is lucky on st patricks day. why? becuase its green all year. *smacks* ow. i kno. but hey im corn.

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Two men are walking down the street. They both don't make eye contact and continue walking.

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a black guy walks into a store and is caught stealing things the police are called they get there and hes calmly escorted to the police car

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Knock knock. Who's there? Blanket Blanket who? Blanket, son of deceased recording artist Michael Jackson. Ever since his father died there has been so much stress in the family that he could not handle it. He ran away and is now seeking shelter and grief council.

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Why didn't Little Timmy's parrot talk? It's neck had snapped.

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For 10 cents a day you can feed an African...they eat pennies.

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When is a door not a door? When it is thrown away. Then, it will likely decompose in a landfill or be recycled into another product. In either case, it will no longer be a door.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops