What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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What do you say to a black man driving a car? Taxi

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I admit I don't know what the future holds, but one thing I know for sure is that... Lance Armstrong has only one ball.

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Q: What do you call an orange if it isn't orange? A: Nothing. Chances are you won't see it until it has ripened.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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What do you call a black man that is on fire? A Man on Fire. The fact that he is black has no relevance in this situation.

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What's big or small, can come in different colors, and would kill you if it was forced inside you? A refrigerator.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Mormens...

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A woman walked into a college.....which wasn't suprising because she never learned to read

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ask me if im a fence are you a fence WALNUTS!

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A kid walks into the car and the dad says, "Wear your seatbelt".

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Why did the cat cross the street? It didn't. I cut off its arms and legs so it couldn't walk.

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"Have you heard the skyscraper joke?" "No." "Oh. Well I don't feel like telling it to you."

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What's worse than requesting a three-some to your in-laws? Forgetting to suggest that they me too fragile and disabled, resulting in one of their limbs breaking.

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How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE!

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What's worse than eating half a worm? Eating somebody's brain.

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What's worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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How do you get children to behave? Chop them up.

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How do you write an anti-joke? With the keyboard Or voice recognition software

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A penis walks into a bar..

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What did one dog say to the other? Nothing silly...dogs can't talk.

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John: what is blue and goes blub blub Phil; I don't know, what? John: a blue blub blub. What is green and goes blub blub Phil; a green blub blub John: no green blub blubs don't exist, what are you stupid?

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Know what im sayin'? No but im wearing pants

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What did the oak tree say to the pine tree? Nothing tress dont speak regardless of the kind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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