So a man walks into a bar, right?

Why did the girl fall off of the swings? Because I threw a refrigerator at her.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

What's worse than a wet sock? Being molested as a child.

Whats black and blue and red all over? An infant after its been beaten with a bat.

Q Why did the chicken cross the road A Nobody knows why because nobody is psych

What did the traffic light say to the car? dont look at me am changing.

What did one ginger say to the other? W are both gingers.

One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

Your mamma used to be fat till Slim Fast came out with dick flavor!

what do you call a man that has a terminal illness and is named James - James

a lazy boy sleeps 23/24 hours. what does he do in the remaining hour ? he takes a nap

Why couldn't the Mexican man get a job? Because he was dead.

what is the difference between an octopus and a dead dolphin? one as tentacles the other is dead.

Your mum is so ugly that i make jokes about how ugly she is

Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

Three midgets walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer, the second one orders whiskey, and the third one ordered water because all three of them had agreed that he would be the designated driver that night.

How do you get a blonde to stop talking? Hit her in the head with a brick.

“DTF”? Says Will. “No” says Harper.

what did batman say to robin before they got in the car? "robin get in the car"

What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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