How did 3 fat women fit under 1 small umbrella and not get wet? It wasn't raining!

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whats red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

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Why do women wear perfume and makeup? They smell bad and they're ugly.

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dallen loves penis

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Why dont you ever see any black mermaids? Mermaids dont exist.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She was too tired and was afraid that if she got behind the wheel it might cause her to fall asleep at the wheel which would result in an accident.

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Why did the college student post unfunny anti-jokes on anti-joke.com? Because he was bored shitless.

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Why did the black guy drink the kool aid? Because there was a glass of kool aid next to him and he was thirsty.

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What begins with "F" and ends in "uck"? There are multiple words or word combinations that begin with "F" and end in "uck," such as fat duck, so you dont need me to tell you, be creative.

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What did Adam Sandler get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

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What's worse than failing a school test for Peter? Nothing, because he is asian.

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David walks into a bar. Someone shoots him. Now hes dead.

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Roses are red My balls are blue Get off Unless You want too

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What did the doctor say to the person who is suffering from obesity? Run fatass Run

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What is worse than torturing, "forcibly penetrate" and then slowly and painfully kill nine billion people? The Holocaust?

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Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

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What happened to the woman driver who drove to Tesco? Due to the pleasant traffic conditions, she arrived slightly earlier than expected and she finished her weekly shop in forty minutes. She returned home, once again in good traffic and ate a delicious lunch of sausages and chips.

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A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

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What happened to the little boy that went to The Penn State locker room? He had a great day meeting the team and watching the football game.

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There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"

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Three men were on a plane. One chucked an apple out the window. Unfortunately, due to the low pressure outside, all the men were sucked out the window.

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How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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