Roses are red Violets are blue We decapitated some little children Now I'm in jail too.

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Why was the road crossed by the chicken? Because as an animal, incapable of understanding human languages and consequently lacking in education, it was unable to understand the convention of not using the passive voice in English prose writing.

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Q: Why is asprin white? A: It works.

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Bible Games aka Bible Buffet: SEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEGAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Sometime after the death and return of Superma... Jesus. God: RAISE FROM YOUR GRAVE! Jesus slays holy white beasts: POWER UP! POWER UP! HOMO UP! Uh did he say homo u... ARGH! CANNOT CONTAIN LEVEL OF HOMO! TURNING FURFAG/ALTERED BEAST. A wild Saten appears!: WELCOME TO YOUR DOOM! Jesus used gay wolf punch, it was not very effective... wild Saten uses OMFG HE TEARS OFF HIS OWN HEAD AND THROWS IT AT JESUS! Its super effective! Jesus Dies. Moral: Second coming? He came back to meet his disciples and crap AFTER quoting "ill be back", did he promise some third coming? Is that why people have been waiting for over 2000 years? :P

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What did the plane say to the world Trade Center on 9/11? Nothing a plane is an object therefore cannot talk.

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 has been convicted on multiple accounts of murder and Grievous Bodily Harm

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Watching your mum get sandwiched by two black guys...

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How you know when dislextic

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An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

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Do you know why, when geese fly south for the winter, one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

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What's big with fat all over it? Your mom on this dick

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Why was six afraid of seven? He wasn't. that joke is just a way to convince you that seven is a scary number.

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what movie can a retarded 8 year old play the lead role in. Zathura

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what happens when a mexican makes love to an octopus? It makes a freaking weird looking animal

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What did the child get from there parent on Christmas? Nothing. He's an orphan.

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Listen Supervisor, this is Agent Clarke of the GOV and the WHO, I suggest you respond ASAP, I suggest you put set me in touch with either Lady, or Axel Knight right away, this is a matter of your personal security.

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Why is the spine-tailed swift is the fastest bird? Because its faster than the second fastest bird

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Why do cow say moo? Because you touch yourself at night

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Why did the boy fall of the swing He had no arms

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What did the boy who was in a chainsaw accident yell to his mom when he was on a rollercoaster? Look ma, no hands!

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? -Because he didn't have any arms!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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Q: What would you think if a homeless person asked, "Spare change for drugs and cigarettes?" A: At least he was being honest.

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What's white and sticky.... Jizz

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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