In soviet russia, child molests you! Unfortunately true

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What's a worse place to be besides the friendzone? On your grandmas lap crying because your parents just died in a car crash.

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what do you get when you give a man viagra? A man with an erect penis. Viagra is known to increase blood flow and vascularization in the penis, allowing for erections for people with erectile dysfunction.

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whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

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If these walls could talk - the public would pay large sums of money to see this marvel of science. On a more serious note, they might also tell the cops about the many dead hookers stowed within them.

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Dude, you were so drunk last night that you got in a terrible car accident, and now you are paralyzed from the waste down for life.

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Did you know that Hellen Keller had a roller coaster in her backyard? Neither did she

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What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

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What time is it in Florida? Time To Eat The President Of The United States!

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Q: What do you call a barn full of black people? A: Antique farm equipment.

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Yo momma so fat she couldn't even fit in a house

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How does Batman's mother call him to dinner? She doesn't, she's dead.

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what do a toothbrush and an ice maker have in common? ....They're both in your house.

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Why is it OK to make fun of a deaf person? Because they can't hear.

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why did the boy call the girl a bitch? Because she was beautiful.

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A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

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Why did the cop pull over the car full of black people? Because, they were going 65 in a 35 mile per hour speed limit zone, Which is against the law.

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I'm schizophrenic and so am I. I also happen suffer from multiple personality disorder. Schizophrenia refers to separation of mental functions, manifesting in anti-social behavior and delusions, and is unrelated to the separate disorder of dissociative identity disorder, popularly known as multiple personality disorder, characterized by at least two distinct and enduring identities and dissociated personality states. Both are crippling to normal behavior and function due to lack of public awareness and funding. Now get out of our ghost train or we'll cut you.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because chad makes babies cry.

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Bill is walking down the street when a girl who had a crush on him 20 years ago sees him, goes up to him, and says, "I think I know you, what is your name?". Bill says, "Timmy," and keeps walking because he is an asshole.

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Roses are red, Wait. Why start this poem when you cant finish it Refrigerator

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.It got ran over by a bus.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your boyfriend's gay

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Why did the black man go to jail? Because he committed a criminal offense.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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