Knock Knock Who's there? Tank tank who? You're welcome

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An English man, a German man and a Canadian man stood on the edge of a cliff. The English and German both jump off. What happens then? The Canadian says "they were serious?!" and runs away to fake his death and live the rest of his life as Frank Brown.

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when life knocks you down you don't do anything because life is a mental concept that does not have the ability to knock you down since it doesn't have a physical bodie

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Why is the baby on fire? Because there was a gas leak at the day care facility. It would have been a terrible tragedy had a heroic babysitter not come to the rescue.

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Why did the Olympic gold-medalist lose his faith in God? Because he began to feel that the the reasoning that most religions were based on was fairly spurious.

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Anti - Jokes. com

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How many Mexicans eating a Taco in California does it take to fix a lightbulb? 1

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing Jenga on September 11th.

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Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

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A man walks into a bar. Another man becomes the Limbo State Champion.

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Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent get brutally murdered.

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Why was a black man in a police car? He is a police officer.

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A woman who lived alone with her parrot left her apartment to run to the store, forgetting that a plumber was scheduled to come and fix her sink. A few minutes later, the plumber arrived and knocked on the door. The parrot inside called out, "WHO IS IT?" The plumber replied, "it's the plumber. I've come to fix the sink." The plumber waited for a bit and, seeing that nobody was coming to the door, knocked again. The parrot called out, "WHO IS IT?" The plumber replied, a little more loudly, "it's the plumber! I've come to fix the sink!" Again the plumber waited. After a few more minutes, he knocked again. The parrot called out, "WHO IS IT?" The plumber yelled, as loudly as he could, "IT'S THE PLUMBER! I'VE COME TO FIX THE SINK!" Still, nobody came to the door. The plumber banged the door repeatedly, The parrot called out, "WHO IS IT?" The plumber screamed "IT'S...THE...PLUMBER!!! I'VE...COME...TO...FIX...THE...SIIIIIIINK!!!" and then, consumed with rage, clutched his chest and fell over dead from a stress-induced heart attack. A few minutes later, the woman returned home and, while opening her door, noticed the plumber lying dead in her hallway. She looked at her parrot and asked, "Who is it?" The parrot called out, "WHO IS IT?"

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike.

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What happens when you Shoot a guy with a red Shirt On? He Dies.

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why did the boy drop his ice cream? he had no hands

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"Ask me if I'm a tree," "Are you a tree?" "No."

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Chuck Norris doesnt eat honey, hes allergic to it.

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,What would you call Morgan Freeman if he was White? Morgan Freeman

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What's the difference between a red shirt and a blue shirt? one is red and one is blue

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Haiku's are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigorator

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How does a black woman know she is pregnant? When she pulls her tampon out the cotton is already picked.

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What happened when the president cut the hedge That is a highly improbable solution because he would probably have a body guard do it.

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There was three women stuck on an island, a blonde, a brunette and a ranga. They are saved days later.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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