- Anti Joke

What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Almost everything.

what do you call a bunch of crap at the bottom of the ocean? A shitwreck!

What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

I'm black and I will beat your children. (This is not an anti-joke)

Can we still mine for gold in the American River? No, anyone seen mining for gold is considered a hobo and all the gold is cleared out by random people in the 17 century

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers. Cheese on toast.

Why couldn't the 13 year old get into the pirate movie? He has cancer and is dying in the hospitable.

9/11 my birthday

Why did the girl fall off of her swing? Because she had no arms.

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A cat walks into a bar. He orders some beer. The bartender asks, why the sad face. The cat replies, "I got laid off"

What do you all a black person on the moon? An Astronaut

"So, what do you fancy doing tonight?" "Does it matter? We'll end up doing what you want anyway..."

Knock knock "Honey, could you get the door?" "I'm tired of doing everything here! Get you ass up and do it yourself!" "Well why don't you just go back to bar you whore?" "This marriage was a mistake, I'm going back to mother!" They divorced 5 months later.

A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

Three friends were walking to school, they all looked in front of them and ran away. What did they see? A 200 ft dragon eating their school.

What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree and onto your head, it will kill you? A pool table.

What's worse then getting followed by a creepy man in a van? Getting followed and raped by a creepy man in a van.

Why do people on this website suck? Because they are n i g g e r s and jews!

a jewish person sees a nickel on a sidewalk and continues walking.

How do you put your babysitter in jail? Kill your kid on her shift.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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