What are you going to get your mom for mothers day? I have two gay dads.

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A buddhist walks up to a hotdog stand asks the server to make him one with everything

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Did you know: it is scientifically proven that people who have more birthdays live longer

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why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

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Why did the black man have a gun in his hand? He was crossing through a dangerous neighborhood and was offering protection to himself and his family.

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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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How many theropists does it take to change a lightbulb? -only one, but it takes a very long time and the lightbulb has to want to change.

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what did the chickpea say to the raison when he got called big but? Atleast i dont have a stick up my but.

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How are a chicken and a grape similar? They're both round. Except the chicken.

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what's 2 + 2 ? 4, unless you add it up wrong.

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Yo mama's so fat when they asked her if she wanted fries with that she said yes

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What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and my cousins? Nothing.

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Did you see Helen Keller at the movie theater? I didn't either, she's dead.

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Hey there, I like bananas! No you don't.

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Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

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What's difficult and tedious to do? Trying to find a joke with 0 thumbs up/down -Sykes

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A man was found dead, in an ice cream van, the other day. He was covered from head to toe in hundreds and thousands, with two flakes sticking out of his ears. The police say it was a tragedy and will be informing his next of kin in the next few days.

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What do you find at a black guys yard sale? A bunch of reasonably priced items since he comes from a low income household.

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Q. How do you know when you've had too much too drink? A. Your dead(No because when your dead you can't think.)

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What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

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Roses r Red Violets r Blue I'm schizophrenic So am i too!

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Billy and Joseph are playing Rock paper scissors. Billy says paper. Joseph proceeds to throw a rock as hard as he can at Billys face and sends him to the emergency room where he was later diagnosed with terminal testicular cancer.

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What do you call a bunch of black people at the bottom of the ocean? Cocoa puffs

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And now a word from our sponsors

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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