Why was it sad for black guys drove off a cliff? There two more seats

A man walks into a bar and orders a pop because he was a designated driver

What's worse than finding a knife in your car? Finding a car in your knife.

How many midgets does it take to screw in a light bulb about 4

Q:How many Elephants can you fit in a Audi quatro? A:It just sits on a leaf and waits for the autumn... Moral: Just sits on a three and waits for it to turn into four.

why did the kitten drink its milk? because it doesnt have a motor so has no need for petrol.

Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

What did the little girl get for Christmas? A pipe bomb

What is long, hard, and full of semen? An erected penis.

How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to drop it and die of gas poisoning.

What do bluejays and cardinals have in common? They both Were born during the Medevil period.

wh did a man all of his bike? It was a wet and slippery day, he had a lack of control and concentration

Why was Michael Jackson so bad at dancing? Because he had a broken leg.

This guy went to the store because he needed potatoes. So he asked the clerk where the potatoes were at and she said "Isle fiveeeeeee!" So he went there and there were no potatoes ! hahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahhahahhahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahajhahahahahhahahhahahhahahahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahhahahhahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahahhahaahhahahahahahahaahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhaahhahaahahahahahhhhahha

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

what's the worst lie in the universe? I swear to god that was my last piece of gum

A man asks his doctor if you can die from drinking to much water. The doctor replies 'Yes you can'

Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

A frog walks up to Steve, and says "Hey, Steve." Steve is terrified because a frog knows his name, and is walking.

Your mom's so fat that when she stepped on the scale at the doctors office the doctor said " hey i wanted your weight not your phone number"

How does it change many dyslexics take to a lightbulb.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia And so do I..

An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have some pints then leave to do their respective tasks for the day.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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