What did Marshawn Lynch say? Yeah

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13 =B you just learned something

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Dane Cook makes a joke.

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What happens when you tickle a rabid iguana? It bites you and you die.

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why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

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My grandpa died in the holocaust. How? He had gas.

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why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? when people don't understand the concept of anti-jokes and post real jokes

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What has two legs and is red all over? Half a dog.

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How do you keep a dummy in suspense for 24 hours? Tell him his wife suffered from a severe concussion and that he'll have to wait until morning to see if she's okay

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Half a worm... What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being Gang-raped!

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1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft's all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired. 8. Just turn your back and drop it. 9. Hold up. I've got to wash my balls. 10. Damn, I missed the hole again.

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On Wednesday night, a drunk man was walking on the cliffs of dover. his funeral was saturday.

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Whats is worse than a dog bite? A shark bite. Whats worse than a shark bite? The Holocaust.

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What happened to the black man when he was hit by a truck? He died.

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how do u get the baby to stop choking? take ur dick out of its mouth!!!

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Q: How do you make a fireman cry?? A: Drown his wife

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Why did the midget fall from a tall building? Because somebody pushed him.

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Whats SxB-Tin+Shack+b= SB FUCKING B

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Q:What happened when the bear walked into the bar? You cannot answer because you were seriously injured by the bear.

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Why did the girl throw away her hairspray? Because she realized the harmful contaminants emitted from the nozzle were expediting the deterioration of the ozone layer thus contributing to global warming.

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What is an offensive way to refer to black people from the time of the Flint Stones? Niggers

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How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to change the light bulb and two to file a lawsuit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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