Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

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Hej Erik och Leo!!

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what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

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How do you get a baby in a bowl? You put it in.

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XD That one was awesome Nero, for a moment I was really wondering if you refer towards a tough guy as yourself as a boy. Now you pretty lucky I like tough guys, and you always have a savage joke at hand don't you?

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Nathaniel Nugnes walks into a bra

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Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

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How many dead babies can you fit in an oven? Depends on if you put them in the blender first.

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How do you post a Tasmanian devil? Recorded Delivery

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

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A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

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This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well shit whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

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hi jonny

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Sammy bought 48 donuts. He ate 36. What was Sammy left with? Diabetes. Sammy was left with diabetes.

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what is your moms favorite website? Wait did I say mom. Oh I'm not very sorry.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding Barney the purple dildo!

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Q: What's green and has four wheels? A: A green car.

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Read a Book.

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what did the iphone say to the galagy s3? nothing they are phones.

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whats big, white and will kill someone if it falls out of a tree? a refridgerater

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A dad says to his son "you better stop masturbating or youll go blind'. And the son says "dad im over here".

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OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

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knock knock whos there? dave dave who ? dave starts to cry because his grandmothers oldtimers has restricted her from remembering her grandson dave.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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