What starts with the letter P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn

Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

Once there was a giant Pringle. His family was dead, his wife committed suicide. So one day he was walking to work, when he met a genie! The genie granted him three wishes. The Pringle's first wish was to have lots of money. His second wish was to have his wife back. Before he could complete his wishing, he awoke in a hospital where he was hooked up to life support and was in severe pain. His wife wasn't really dead, but he was out drinking and accidentally walked across a motorway and got hit by a huge lorry.

Your mom is so nce that when you got into college she taught you to be more independent so you could succeed later in life.

1)Roses are red... 2)5 black men... 3)dead babies walk into a large crowded bar before dissolving into oblivion at the literary incongruency 4)of the whole situation.... 5)yes chicken got to the other side BEFORE me #)stupid chicken (aka duck rose man help....)

Do you play piano? No

what did the duck with roller skates say to the camel? how are the wife and kids?

A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"

What's worse than stubbing your toe? Slavery.

What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

What happened to the little boy that went to The Penn State locker room? He had a great day meeting the team and watching the football game.

Knock-knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Knock-knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Knock-knock Who's there? Banana Banana who? Banana you glad I didn't say banana?

Whats funnier than a baby in a jar? A baby in ten jars.

what ddo you call someone that has a small dick benjamin

why was the black man scared of cats ? Because a gang of cats ate his family

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

Burrinbar Smells like incest anal sex!

A Priest and a Rabbi find a very young lost child. They both agree that their religions obligate them to find the child shelter.

The Dali Lama walks into a pizza parlor and asks the owner to make him one with everything. After 20 minutes or so the owner brings the Dali Lama a pizza with every available topping. After he finished eating the Dali Lama thanked the owner and left a nice tip.

Why did the Mexican cross the border? To get into the USA for a better lifestyle.

Next Q: What's worse than a bee sting? A: Two bee stings. Q: What's worse than two bee stings? A: Three bee stings. Q: What's worse than three bee stings? A: Sexual assault.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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