Why is it unpleasant to eat a meal with lots of basketball players? Because they will be focussing entirely on discussing tactics (especially if there is an upcoming game), and therefore will probably not be displaying good manners or making polite mealtime conversation.

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What did the man do with the naked baby girl? He put some clothes on her and proceded to lay her down for a nap.

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

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What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

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Why was the black man arrested? He was tried and convicted in a court of law for being an accessory to murder.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock...

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What did one cannibal say to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

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i know you talk the talk but can you talk the talk

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

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A deaf man walks into a bar. Someone yells, "FIRE!" and everyone evacuates. The deaf man does not hear him and dies horribly.

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What's worse than a dead baby? A dumpster full of dead babies What's worse than that? One is still alive at the bottom What's worse than that? It had to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It came back for seconds

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How did the mom quiet her screaming baby? She threw it out the window.

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Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

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Roses are red, Violets aren't. This doesn't make sense. Potatoes and brown.

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How does an elephant climb a cliff who cares

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How do you stop a black man drowning? Take your foot off his head

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sorry, wrong house.

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What's black and at the top of a burning building? A paraplegic

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What does it say on the back of Superman`s cape on the "new" movie? My other actor was an awesome dude, all I got now is this asshole... Moral: Christopher Reeve... takes lasers... shotguns, eats lava with his cornflakes... falls of a horse... dies... Moral2: HEY What is the booing for? This is the ANTI JOKE! SECTION... but now to my sincerest thoughts... Moral 3: R.I.P Christohper Reeve, he lived and died with hope... Dying happy while suffering from one of the worst things that can happen to a human being, is an inspiration to us all! True superman!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops