9/11 my birthday

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why couldn't the 13 year old get into the pirate movie? He has cancer and is dying in the hospitable.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I'm black and I will beat your children. (This is not an anti-joke)

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Can we still mine for gold in the American River? No, anyone seen mining for gold is considered a hobo and all the gold is cleared out by random people in the 17 century

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers. Cheese on toast.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't Why can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllpeople tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't Why can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllpeople tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't Why can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllpeople tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't Why can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllpeople tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllll

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you all a black person on the moon? An Astronaut

thumb_up thumb_down -2

"So, what do you fancy doing tonight?" "Does it matter? We'll end up doing what you want anyway..."

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A cat walks into a bar. He orders some beer. The bartender asks, why the sad face. The cat replies, "I got laid off"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the girl fall off of her swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What happened when the nigga looked up his family tree? A gorilla shit in his face

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Two friends are sitting on a couch watching TV. One friend accidently turned on a pornography channel. The other friend felt awkward and went home.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you keep children off your lawn? Touch them.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why doesnt Squidward wear pants? Because he likes to hang loose

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Rebecca Black walked into a stadium. There were so many seats to choose from. But, she sat down in the nearest seat she could find and enjoyed the football game.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

An Aussie, American and Englishman were all drinking beer on a plane to Hawaii. All 3 of them were very excited for their vaction, which they all saved hard for and their breaks from work were well deserved.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Almost everything.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

a cow walked into a bar and asked for a large whiskey on the rocks, 'long day, eh' said the barman, 'yes' replied the cow, 'first a large moving obstical was cutting down my food, and then my friend was raped from his milk.'

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats the difference between a bench and a black man? A bench is an inanimate object incapable of speech, emotion, or thought process.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what do you call a bunch of crap at the bottom of the ocean? A shitwreck!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops